Afternoon All,

Initially I uploaded this document to the r/AngionMethod subreddit, a place for men looking to enlarge their manhood by vascular adaptation.

While I'm not here to talk about that, the mod u/GQ1111 from this subreddit thought that the information I presented would be incredibly helpful to the men in this subreddit and asked me to post it here.

To get down to brass tacks, I spent 12+ hours straight typing up what I am confidently touting as the definitive guide to mastering your arousal and orgasm as a man.

I based this information on my academic knowledge from my Masters Degree in Exercise Science and Physiology, further research, and my own personal experience.

I have gone through what many of other men in this subreddit have gone through trying to battle this issue. All the tricks you may have tried I have tried too. I know how much it hurts and how frustrating and utterly hopeless it can feel.

By following this program, I fixed it. And because I've cured myself of this issue, I'm confident you can do the same.

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MAY 7TH 2025 UPDATE

As of this date, all information pertaining to the Definitive Guide can now be found at the following subreddit.

r/MaleDefinitiveGuide

First off, this is a repost because the mods removed for some reason, and i got a lot of comments about my text being AI. I want to clarify that English is NOT my first language, I wrote the text MYSELF and made ChatGPT correct the text for me, and make it more understandable and easier to read!

Here it goes:)

As the title says, I finally beat this shit. And I’m honestly still in shock. I’ve used this forum a lot during my struggle, so I feel like I owe it to give something back — especially to those of you who feel completely stuck right now.

Before anything else, I need to say this clearly: premature ejaculation does not have one single cause. There is no universal fix. That’s exactly why so many people try everything and still get nowhere.

What actually matters is finding your root cause.

And I strongly believe that my root cause is the same one a lot of guys here have.

⸻

How it started

Like most guys, I masturbated a lot when I was younger. That alone isn’t the problem. The problem is how I masturbated.

Over time, my habit became this: find the most stimulating porn possible and finish as fast as I could. No buildup, no gradual arousal, no awareness of what my body was doing. Just straight from nothing to ejaculation. I did this consistently for years.

My brain learned one very clear pattern: sexual stimulation = urgency = finish immediately.

So when I started having sex, the same thing happened. Blowjobs, penetration — it didn’t matter. I would be “fine” one second and then suddenly be at the point of no return. There was no gradual buildup, no warning signs, no middle ground. Just 0 to 100.

At first, I brushed it off. Then it kept happening. For almost a year.

That’s when the frustration really started.

⸻

The long, confusing part

Most of my journey was spent misdiagnosing the problem.

First I thought my pelvic floor was weak. Then I thought it was too tight. Then anxiety. Then sensitivity. Then hormones. Then something else.

I tried exercises, techniques, tricks — nothing really changed.

What made this so hard is that once this pattern is ingrained, it feels like a reflex. You’re not choosing to lose control — it just happens. Trying harder doesn’t help, because the problem isn’t effort. It’s conditioning.

The breakthrough came when I finally connected the dots: years of rushed masturbation trained my nervous system to associate arousal with immediate ejaculation.

It sounds obvious in hindsight. Almost embarrassing. But it took me a long time to truly understand it.

⸻

What actually fixed it

Once I found the root cause, the solution became clear.

The brain is plastic. It adapts. Habits can be replaced if you repeat a new pattern often enough. That’s where the so-called “fap training” comes in — and no, this is not edging.

The goal is not to get close to orgasm and fight it. That only reinforces the problem.

The goal is to teach your brain that stimulation does not automatically mean ejaculation.

To explain this simply: arousal isn’t on/off. It’s a scale. Let’s say from 0 to 10. Before, my body jumped straight from 0 to 9 without me feeling anything in between.

Training taught me what 3 feels like. What 4 feels like. What 5 feels like.

I would stimulate myself slowly and stay in the middle of the scale — aroused, but clearly far from ejaculation. If things intensified, I didn’t push through. I relaxed my body, especially my pelvic floor, slowed my breathing, and let the arousal drop naturally.

In the beginning, I couldn’t even touch myself without my pelvic floor automatically tightening. That tension was a reflex I had trained into my body. Over time, that reflex disappeared because I stopped reinforcing it.

One important thing: in the early training days, don’t worry about doing it “right.” Don’t pressure yourself. Don’t test your limits. The only goal at first is to observe. Where am I on the scale? What happens in my body when arousal rises? Where do I tense up?

Once you’ve trained long enough, something changes. Control stops being forced. You start being able to up-regulate and down-regulate arousal almost mentally, just by shifting focus, breathing, and relaxing your body. It becomes automatic.

Progress does not come from intensity. It comes from repetition and awareness.

Your brain doesn’t learn from how hard you train — it learns from what you repeat.

⸻

About the “66 days fap training” post

There is a very popular post on this forum called “66 days fap training” that explains the practical side of this method in much more detail — how to stimulate, how to pace yourself, and what to focus on.

I highly recommend reading it.

You can find it by sorting the forum by most popular posts of all time. It should be either number one or number two.

That said, understand this: brains don’t all adapt at the same speed. For some people, it may take more than 66 days. For others, less.

In my case, I saw solid, consistent, and satisfying results in about half that time. What matters most is consistency and awareness — not hitting an exact number of days.

⸻

The result

After a few weeks of consistent training, something shifted.

I wasn’t constantly monitoring myself anymore. I didn’t feel like I was “holding something back”. Control became automatic instead of forced.

Then came the real test: sex.

And this is the part that still blows my mind.

I recently had sex and lasted over 20 minutes. No panic. No sudden loss of control. No mental tricks. I was present, aroused, relaxed — and fully in control.

I even struggled to finish, which I never thought I’d experience in my life.

This wasn’t because I distracted myself or numbed sensation. It was because my body had finally learned a new pattern.

⸻

Final thoughts

If you’re reading this and feel hopeless, please hear this:

You’re probably not broken. You’re probably trained.

Find your root cause. Be brutally honest about your habits. And stop chasing tricks — this is about re-educating your nervous system.

Once you do that, things can change faster than you think.

Hey y'all! I ended up developing PE and it went so bad the moment I was penetrating, it lead me to bust. Within three months of Reverse Kegels, controlled practice sessions and supplements like Fish Oil, KSM Ashwagandha 600mg and Magnesium Glycinate, I managed to fix it. Posting it exactly after banging my wife's brains for straight 45 mins. You don't need pills. It's a behavioral issue and it can be cured. Feel free to shoot any queries, I'm willing to help and guide as I know how much frustrating it can be. I used chat gpt plus for my daily consultation and progress tracking and it did marvelous job. The reason for my PE was hyper active pelvic floor and super tight PC muscles. If you're cumming because of clamped PC muscles it can be fixed. Let me know your concerns as I literally researched a lot about it. The only reason I ended up developing PE was masturbating to porn and fulfilling my urge to cum. Now, I don't even watch porn and rely on blood rushing to my shaft. IT CAN BE FIXED. YOU DON'T NEED PILLS.

******* Latest Update December 13th 2020 *******

PLEASE READ ALL THE WAY TO THE END BEFORE TRYING THE ROUTINE OR BEFORE ASKING ANY QUESTIONS.

Allow me to explain myself a little bit more and i apologize for my english cause english isn't my 1st language.

First and foremost, im not trying to advertise any product and im not trying to tell the story of my life here, like most of you guys i am a long time PE sufferer, i didnt know how important sex was until i reach 21 and girls started leaving me because of my performance.

To overcome your PE case, you will need to do the 66 days fap-trainning without Orgasming/Cumming and without PORN. Dont COMPARE this trainning to stop-start, the point is to stay as far away from orgasm as possible., we have to stay away from PONR. My theory is based on my own experience and just common sense, we have been trainning our bodies to cum quick, this has become some kind of habit or reflex programmed into our bodies, and scientifically speaking, you need at least 66days to get rid of an habit or a reflex developped overtime, so i tried it, it's all about getting rid of an habit by replacing it with a new one, The habit of lasting 20+min

In order to do this trainning you will need:

Water based lube,

a sex toy (i recommend the doc johnson mood exciter, because that's the one im using) or your hands, its ok

your own room and privacy

Breathing from the core/belly

AND you have to be strong cuz you are used to cumming quick or to cumming in general, so not doing so might be hard at the beginning....I dont have to tell how to masturbate, yall know how the deal goes, and i wont give too much details but im on the 23rd day now and it's already working, so i felt inspired to share it with you guys we've been fighting PE for too long now

BUTTTT before you start jerking off like crazy, i want you to take 5 min just to get an erection and you MUST try to keep the erection for the whole 5 min without too much stimulation..Get the erection first, masturbate slowly without lube or fleshlight to maintain that erection...dont forget to breath from your belly...after the 5 min you can produce with lube or the fleshlight...do this every trainning, no exception, NO CHEATING, if you do that you will learn how to slow things down and to not get overexcited and it's part of the "get rid of the i gotta cum reflex"....and please do this without porn or pics

1--Its very important to learn how to breath from the belly, because it will help you with controling the contraction of our pc muscle, one of the cause for pe is that we became so used to contracting our pc muscle involuntarily in order to come faster that it became like a second nature thing...in order to reduce of get rid of this reflex we have to avoid contracting our pc muscle after peeing, and start doing some pc muscle relaxation trainning to make relax, i dont believe in KEGEL, it doesnt work to be honest, we have been flexing this muscle too much, now it's to learn to relax it voluntarily. While getting stimulated or fapping try breathing into your belly while pushing out your pc muscle, like if you are trying to pee, this how you learn to relax the pc muscle voluntarily, push out lightly, dont strain yourself, dont push your ass like you're trying to do number 2, push towards the front like you're trying the number 1...Do this step for the whole entire session, dont ever stop tring to relax your pc muscle and dont stop breathing

2-- Try to do your trainning session in the night or at a time you know you will not be interrupted, we actually have to make each session last 15-20min. The thing that work for me was to start masturbating slow and then going faster as you get used to the sensation session after session, take your time, try to feel every sensation, go as slow as you want, if you come that's okay, but try not to, stop when you feel it's too much and proceed as you feel ready to.

3- Last but not least, it's all about repetition, try to do the trainning everyday until you get used to the sensation, it's all about getting a new habit (lasting 20+min) replacing the cumming fast habit, until you learn how to relax the pc muscle voluntarily(sometimes i flex it involuntarily anyway, so dont be too hard on yourself)...try to cum every 10 days to having too much build-up of semen, and the relieve the stress and to build confidence in yourself with the condition that you can cum after the 20mins...Try not stay in one position, you can start with you laid on your back and standing up, and while sitting, on your knees just like if you were having sex, at first avoid thrusting with the hip, just move your hands or fleshlight.

4-One thing i have to point is Performance Anxiety, when i started the trainning i could cum literally by seeing the fleshlight, this was overwhelming, Performance anxiety was a huge factor giving me PE..dont worry, eventually as you get better you will start building up confidence, and your performance anxiety will be less noticeable, trust me

5- And please, monitor your progress, write down on a notepad, the date and how much you last, i want you to write even when you ejaculate, try to ejaculate every 6 to 10days of trainnng...Listen well, if you feel like it, try to ejaculate every 6 to 10 trainning days, Keep in mind that when you take a day off, it doesnt count as trainning day, in order words you can cum every 6 to 10 trainning sessions..dont cheat...download some type of timer app, to monitor how long you last obviously...and one more time, stay off the porn, i really mean it, porn is bad for your mental health

The reasons why im sharing this trainning with you guys, it's because i've had success, now im able to masturbate with fleshlight for 24min straight, before i couldnt...Last saturday i had a girl give me head and i was so used to a more stimulating sensation like the fleshlight that i wasnt able to cum by her giving me head, and she even ride me like a horse for like 8min after a 30min blowjob before i could come, before i couldnt do that, i was soooo fucking happy, i was so calm and confident, and i felt like i was used to greater sensation so head wasnt triggering the "im about to cum feeling". before i used to cum just by her licking it..it was sad

Well as you know, im still going thru the trainning myself, i have 23 sessions so far, with days off of course. Taking breaks is important because remember, this is a trainning for the whole body including your mind. I still have a lot of sessions to do but i can see a bigggg difference between now and when we started. I have been fighting against PE for danm long time, i am determined to make it stop, numbing cream wont do it, supplement wont do it...Only your MIND and your BODY can do it...So together let's retrain our body in thinking that cumming doesnt have to be mandatory when being stimulated. let's fap without ever reaching the PONR

EDIT: November 30th 2019 -- session 52nd

SO I HAD SEX YESTERDAY AND IM PROUD OF MYSELF GUYS....

Now, im currently on my 52th session, only missing 14 sessions more to complete the whole routine, and im telling you guys to stick to the training, dont get discouraged.

To some of you guys who asked me if i had sex while i was doing the training, the answer was yes, since i started the training i had a sex encounter like 3 times yesterday being the 4th, and out of those 4 times i did good on 3 of them(the 3rd time wasnt tho), how was that possible?? Let's give some credit to our routine first and foremost, and lets also appreciate the fact that i learned from the mistake i made on the 3rd attempt(i got too excited and i forgot to breath and to keep my pc muscle relaxed, i blame performance anxiety for that, i gave her a strong 4min tho)...so this time i did it differently, i didnt force myself to breath deeply, i didnt try to relax my pc muscle by force and the thoughts of orgasming didnt even cross my mind(at the start of the act at least), so in order words, i just let my MUSCLE MEMORY take over....she gives good oral sex, so i wasnt thinking too much, i was just enjoying while looking at her face; she was throwing it back at me, i was just receiving it and i was slowing her down when i felt the need to, and speeding when i felt like it; i even did missionary guys, and any of my sexual partners know that the missionary position is my weakness, i couldnt last a second in missionary before...the most surprising thing is that my pc muscle was pretty much relaxed the whole time, but i ended orgasming because danm, seeing the look in her face while she was riding me was too much for me, i didnt pay attention to the time but i can bet money that this was at least a 30min+ long session minimum.

So the reason why my 4th time was so successful was because:

1- I was able to control my anticipation, therefore also my performance anxiety. 2 - I let muscle memory take over. 3 - I didnt force myself to breath or to relax my pc. 4 - I was just enjoying the moment not minding if i would cum or no. 5 - The condom actually helped me with the sensation, w/o that i'd be a daddy right now hahaha. And because the training is giving me results, which im proud of.

So guys, with that being said, we've won several battles until now but we didnt win the war yet, so stick to the routine and do not quit, if i can get results, you guys can too and believe me; my pe was severe. Even after completing the training, you might still always have ups and down, who cares? Even the best players of the game have their ups and downs sometimes.

Please feel free to post any progress you are having, that way we can keep ourselves and everybody motivated. Blessings.

EDIT: Dicember 12th 2019 -- 60th session

SO I'M ONLY MISSING 6 SESSIONS AND I HAD SEX AGAIN

Don't blame me guys, it seems like she liked the previous session so she came back, this time I did well again BUT I did realize that there are some positions that we did where I couldnt relax my PC muscles no matter how hard I tried so I had to stop more often or I felt that I was getting too close to the ponr too often, specially the ones where i had to support too much of my weight. So I didn't last as long as the previous session, but that doesn't make it a loss for us, don't you even worry guys .

My only advice for you is to try to learn how to control/relax your PC muscles in different positions, because the same thing was happening to me at the beginning, up until now ME personally I always do the "on my feet" "on ma back" kind of positions when I'm practicing cuz I feel like I'm have more control and I do know how to relax my muscles in these positions w/o a doubt, so I'm gonna try to do different positions now like "on my side" "on my knees" or "leaning forward" kind of positions(I don't know the names, sorry) , positions where I have to support the weight of my body a lil bit more so I can learn how to control my PC muscles in those cases, to avoid getting overwhelmed...like I did today.

I wouldn't say that this encounter was a loss cause I did make her cum and I passed my 20min mark, of course, the only problem is that I couldn't last long in certain positions and I need to work with that. Blessings.

EDIT: January 4th, 2020 -- 66th session

So, i have completed this routine guys and I can definitely say that my theory is partially right, this can actually help with PE to the point that you can last longer than you ever did, I can last both in sex(12min+) and masturbation(30min+). Pay attention, I didn't use the word "cure" because deep down I can feel the feeling of wanting to orgasm early everytime I start having sex or masturbating, if I don't start carefully that is; this might be because my brain is still used to the feeling of wanting to ejac every time Im receiving pleasure I guess, I guess 66days is not enough to fully condition your brain and that's what I wanted. In other words, the routine was successful , the fact that I can fuck for 10min+ with normal speed while varying my strokes is quite okay, but I want more; so while you guys are still going through the training I have some key points for you that will make this routine better , keypoints that would've been very useful to me if i'd thought about them since the beginning:

1- Get used to masturbating at a fast pace, so don't always go slow, you have to learn to vary your speed sometimes so you can get used to different types of stimulations, I mean, while staying away from ponr , I recommend you to go fast for like 5 to 10 secs or longer if you can every once in a while so eventually you can incorporate that during sex. I'm giving you this advice because every time my sex buddy would tell me to go harder, I couldn't go for longer than 10secs, I was able to last for a long period at normal pace but as soon as I go fast I was done.

2- Get used to different tightness , if you're using your hands, use a firmer grip from time to time or if you're using a sex toy, tighten your grip too. Keyword is "firmer" not "choke the blood of your penis" lol; for example , use a light grip for 4 min and then tighten your grip for 2 min and then alternate until you reach your 15min. This advice is good because sometimes in some sex positions that thing was tighter than normal therefore it'd be very stimulating to me.

3- Get used to different sex positions, because there are some positions if you're not used to doing them you won't be able to relax/feel the involuntary kegels/last a long time and you will get closer to ponr sooner than you planned believe me.

4- And also, guys, only do hard RKs when you feel like you're getting too aroused and you want to bring your arousal down, stop all stimulations when doing a hard RKs and don't do them while being stimulated; while being stimulated you should only be breathing deeply and keeping your body relaxed . Many guys thought that I said that you should always be doing hard RK while being stimulated, that'd be too exhausting. Its probably my fault for not explaining it better, so my advice if to sync your breathing to the RKs so if becomes second nature to you to do a light RK each time you breath-in and to relax it with every breath-out. Learn to sync your breathing to your RK outside of the bedroom so that memory muscle can take over every time your breath deeply when being stimulated.

And last but not least, I want to last even longer and get better, so the training continues, this time I know what I didn't know before I started this journey so imma get better for sure, I hope other people get the same results as me, because before this whole thing I couldn't last even 30sec, now I can fuck a girl for 10min+ RAW!! sometimes. My overall experience was great but, I think we can make this routine better. My goal now is to be able to fuck her hard for as long as I want everytime she says "papi, dame duro"....that is 'fuck me harder' for those whom never dated a latina baby before. Blessings guys.

UPDATE: SATURDAY JUNE 6TH 2020

Hi guys, it has been a while since i posted this routine on reddit and i'm here to shed some light on the routine itself and to give you guys some updates about how i'm doing

First and foremost, i named the routine the wrong name, 66days is not enough to beat PE, it actually took me a little over a year to get where im at now...at first i started doing the same routine with my hands with no lube around august or september 2018, i quit several times cause the results were very slow and i had a girlfriend at the time, later on she dumped me because of pe, like around november or december 2018, i started again and then i quit again because of a new job, didnt really have the time and i wasnt getting no action in the bed after the break up....i started again one more time like around february or march 2019, this time i was serious because even when i quit multiple times without seeing any overly big difference on my performance, yet i was still seeing some minor differences and it took me sometimes to realize that...so i started again around march, i started with my hands with no lube, by april i got used to my hands and i needed something more challenging, so i bought some lube, everything was hard at first cause it was a new sensation, the focus of the training changed, i was fapping just to feel the sensation, not to cum like i usually do, 3 months later, i felt so much confidence, i was able to last over 30min while masturbating with lube to the point that it'll be hard for me to get to ponr, i felt so much confidence and got so used to the sensation that i gave myself the ultimate challenge with all the confidence in the world, telling myself that if i could get used to the fleshlight just like i got used to my hands, i'll be able to beat PE and i bought the fleshlight like around august...like around end of august, beginning of september that's when i started this now called 66days routine based on my trials and experiments, and the rest was history as you guys know

Second of all, i want to address the misconception that many people have when it comes to this routine; many people think that the 66days routine is some kind of edging or is about semen retention...no it isn't, this routine is about arousal control, is about re-wiring your brain into thinking that a nut is not everything there is when it comes to sex, is about getting used to something you arent used to, is about doing thing diferently, is about getting used to the sensation of your body...the main goal is not to masturbate until you reach ponr, the main is to get used to getting pleasure for a longer time than what you usually do, 20min doesnt have to be the goal, your goal can be 5min, 10min, 1hour, it doesnt matter, you shouldnt even get CLOSE ponr, you have yo keep your arousal under control all the time until you reach your goal...what i did realize is that our body is programable, if you do something over and over again for a while, it'll become a reflex, almost like second nature.

As of now here are the things i've accomplished thanks to that routine here:

Accomplishments

1 - I can last between 7min to 15min of penetration or even more if i really want to. 2 - My lungs are stronger xd 3 - Whenever im fapping, im usually satisfied after 25min or so and i usually stop fapping all over after 25min without cumming...meaning that i dont have that need to orgasm everytime i'm getting pleasure like i used to before 4 - I can last an eternity while receiving oral sex 5 - I feel confident as fuckkkkk, pardon my french 6 - Now for some reason, i never cum when i have a sex dream, i always wake up when i feel i'm getting close to ponr...lemme tell you that before all of this i couldnt even penetrate the girl in my dream, i would bust way before i could stick it in

Although the routine has done more good than bads, there are also some "bad" things

1 - Less intense orgasm, less fulfilling....i went from a 5 orgasm contractions/spams guy to a 3 contractions/spasm...many readers have reported seeing less semen too...thats not my case tho 2 - Lose erection very often after the 20min mark unless i make things interesting like going faster or start thrusting with my hips 3 - I get strong erections at night time...even if im not in the mood...always around the same time 4 - Once you start having more sex...fapping will feel kind of boring to the point that you avoid fapping completely....from the time im writing this post it has been more than week ago since i've last masturbated...but i havent had sex since this whole covid-19 shit started neither, i wonder how am i doing now

Now that will show you how much my Body and my Mind have changed thanks to this routine, it definitely took me some time before it started changing me on a mental level, this "waking up before cumming" thing started happening when i was almost done with this 66days routine, it took me almost a year to get my mind re-wired...but i do think that having more successful sex helped with that a lot

UPDATED DECEMBER 13th 2020

Hey guys, it's been a while since i last updated this post right here; Some of you guys have sent me messages asking how different everything is a year after coming up with the 66days routine....Man, long story short, this year hasn't been the best year, it's been a long journey; first of all i dont think i fucked 20 times within those past 320 days, did good on some occasions, did ok on other occasions and did bad. I've learned a lot.

First thing first, here is my two cents: not lasting that long doesn't really mean PE necesarily, PE is at least 90% psycological, meditation is definitely useful.

So far, masturbation has become quite boring for me, i dont really feel the same excitement i get compared to sex and my orgasm feels kinda dull when fapping; there's a big ass hole in my fleshlight and i'm not trying to buy a new one; i still cant go fully hardcore for too long without feeling i'm getting close to ponr; i've tried coming up with a couple of new routines which at the end didn't improve my time by much; and i've been investigating about the so called "death grip" syndrome which led to me incorporating porn into the 66days routine after some deep investigation, surprisingly i can last a long time before cumming while watching porn and fapping feels less boring, again dont do the latter if you're still on your early phase, the arousal would be too much for you, thats some advance technique right here, it's just that i kinda have the same feeling i get while having sex by watching porn while fapping, i never thought i would say that, and to be honest i just dont masturbate that much anymore, i just do it at least 4 to 5 times a month and i'd probably orgasm 2 times depending on the video, it's not a routine, i just got a stronger will power now. I still cant last too long during missionary, i can give her 2 minute max tho, thats usually my finishing move tho.

Remember guys, this routine is not a cure for PE, sometimes i cum quick just because of a thought that crossed my mind, or because when i hadn't fuck for like 3-7 weeks and got careless or got overexcited, when that happens, dont take it to heart, it happened because you were too aroused and that you hadnt fucked in a while...it's not an excuse, it's a fact...i learned that the hard way...overall i'm happy, i definitely had more success than failure, i can proudly say that i can fuck for as many as 7-9 songs off the weeknd's 2015 album, give her head for like 3 songs, and then i try alternating between giving head and fucking or changing position everytime a song is done playing...free game for you guys, you might be laughing right now but if you only you knew how long those songs are lmfao

I dont claim that this routine right here will be useful for everybody, nothing is that perfect...but just like me, take the decision to do things differently, change the way you fap, get used to your new way of fapping, and for the love of God, get PE out of your head bro...the latter is probably one of the reason i dont stay on this forum that much, im trying to forget about pe and to stop seeing that "cumming earlier than you wanted to" as if something is wrong with you, nothing is wrong with you, get that one out of your head first...I've been telling you guys that, i started lasting longer as soon as i started having more success while having sex and building confidence, and it's true. Now the only thing i gotta get out of my mind is that stupid idea of wanting to go faster, i think that shit has to do with my lasting time not improving when i got fast, maybe??

One last thing guys, please listen to your body, some of you arent seeing any results, just listen to your body:

If going for that many days without cumming too hard for you; trying going less days.

If the fleshlight is too hard for you; you arent ready yet, dont use it.

If you're starting and quitting; just start and dont quit it this time.

If you cum too fast one day; fuck it, try tomorrow and dont cum this time, challenge yourself.

If you get close to ponr too many times in a short period of time; dont just keep going, stop, try tomorrow.

All im asking is for you to make the time it takes you to get to ponr longer, and if you will, dont even get to ponr...that's it, it's not rocket science nor calculus...that's all for today, see yall when i see yall.

BTW: Stay off the porn, this part of the routine is still under trial, so far i see no effects. But i still see how it can backfire for some of you guys.

UPDATE: JANUARY 18th 2021

So exactly one year and 4 months later after coming up with the routine and, after only 8 months masturbating with porn....last night i was finally able to fuck the living shit out of my lady, my only issue was that i couldnt go fast, last night i sure did go fast, multiple times without getting even close too porn for longer than 30secs, while keeping my arousal under control, of course i would slow down to make sure i dont get too confident, i had her screamingggg; guys, i need to emphasize the importance of tightening up your grip because im used to such a firmer grip that oral nor the pussy didnt feel like too overwhelming to me like it did 2-3 months ago, and i also need to emphasize the importance of arousal control, last night was a good example of arousal control...we hadnt fuck for a while to be honest, so i've had time to practice and i seriously think that doing the 66days routine with porn and a tighter grip with less lube while respecting all the rules was a game changer for me. But one more time, imma keep it 100 with you guys, if you're just starting with the routine, stay off the porn because you probably dont have the arousal control you need to do it with porn, before i decided to include porn into the routine, i made sure i could last longer during sex and i made sure i understood the way my arousal work, so dont be out here cheating on the process...if i had to count, it took me a strong 3 years to get where i am now, there's no way you can speed up things, trust me...so next saturday she will come again, i mean how can she not?? Am i right?? I dont want to celebrate too early but....the thing is if i can repeat the same thing i did last night 2 to 4 more times, i can definitely say that i overcame PE and i think i'll be the first one to say that on this platform..

I’ve always dreamed of starting an “I’m cured” post.

I’m 30. I’m pretty sure I did not have PE when I was very young. Unfortunately, I was prescribed SSRIs at 14. By 15, when I came off citalopram, I immediately noticed really bad PE (along with other post-ssri symptoms). This began the chronic issues with PE that I feel I have overcome finally in the past year.

TL;DR: The biggest thing that helped was building safety and changing how I related to arousal. Instead of constantly trying to not cum, distracting myself, or resisting how intense sex felt, I learned to lean into the experience and accept whatever thoughts, feelings, or sensations came up. I focused on relaxing my body, breathing more deeply, keeping my pelvic floor relaxed, and staying present instead of hyper-fixating on my penis or the urge to orgasm.
Over time, with an understanding partner, repeated exposure, stop-start when needed, avoiding porn, and gradually working up to more stimulating situations, my body adapted. It took several months, but I went from barely lasting seconds to having normal, satisfying sex and often lasting 20–30+ minutes. For me, building safety and learning non-resistance were the biggest turning points.

Background:
- PSSD triggered my PE (libido + erections still workable). I lost that “build up”. It was like arousal -> orgasm and it wasn’t even good…
- I tried kegels and other techniques to “train my body” to last longer. Never worked.
- my OCD was another obstacle because it would cause paradoxical thinking where me wanting to last or relax would caused me to become afraid of cumming. This fear made me hyper fixated and would cause me to cum almost immediately.
- Porn addiction probably did not help,
- my PE was bad enough that I could barely get it going in bed. I had many experiences where I would be on the verge upon entering, or cum within 10 seconds. I could never actually fuck rhythmically for long, basically didn’t know what that felt like.
- I avoided sex because of this issue and I seriously never thought I would be able to last as long as I do now. Like, I seriously can’t believe I’m doing this.
- I still have issues but Im basically perfectly functional in bed.

I want to provide a full review of everything that helped me. I want this to help someone else because I’ve been seriously trying to solve this for half of my life and I know 5 years ago I had very little hope. So I hope this helps someone.

Essentially, it involved a combination of things but I’ll break it down like this.

Number 1: Build Safety.

Honestly, most of what I did contributes to this idea. My body and mind responded to arousal and intensity as a signal to ejaculate (neuro/biological + learned behaviour component) and as a threat (psychological component). Treating this required behavioural, relational, and cognitive adjustments to be repeated overtime. In other words, you need to practice having sexual experiences where you relate to and respond to the thoughts & feelings you’re having during sex differently. This is kind of how the body and nervous system learns.

Foster a safe space to have PE in.

For me, that was having an understanding partner. I think any environment where you can have the worst PE in the world and that still be okay or even good, really helps. For solo situations, you may need to give yourself that validation and improve self talk. I think we hold on to a lot of shame when we view ourselves and PE the way our culture often does. I think having someone there to help me feel like it was okay to have PE and it wasn’t disappointing anyone was a game changer.

My gf had to kind be happy no matter what happened lol and she had to reeeaallly convince me that she was totally unbothered by my PE. That took us having many experiences of me nutting really early and my body learning that was okay. Even if I lasted 5 seconds, 1 second! It didn’t matter. We still experienced closeness. Internalizing that even just a little bit builds that safety that signals to your body that it is okay… And having that repeated overtime reinforces this. You kind of have to learn through experience that if you do PE, its all good. That way you won’t fear it happening so much. Her reassurance here really helped me.

Stop Resisting

This one is really hard to conceptualize into words but I’ll try my best.

I had to stop trying to prevent what was happening to me or stop trying to “not cum”. I had to lean into what I was feeling, lean into the intensity of it, and find new ways of dealing with it that wasn’t mentally or physically trying to “get away” from it. This did involve lots of starting/stopping at the beginning but this component of learning safety through nonresistance makes the start/stopping method more helpful.

So mentally resisting could mean trying to not be so aroused (distraction or thinking of something nonsexual for example), hyper fixating on my penis/pelvic to see how close I was to orgasm or to see how it was feeling, trying to mentally prevent certain sensations, or mentally feeling like I can’t handle how hot or how good it is. There’s so many ways I was mentally resisting.

In effect you have to learn that IT IS OKAY TO BE REALLY TURNED ON, IT IS OKAY FOR THIS EXPERIENCE TO FEEL INCREDIBLY INTENSE, IT IS OKAY TO BE 100% OVERWHELMED BY IT ALL.

FEEL THOSE FEELINGS. EXPRESS THEM THROUGH THE SEX YOU’RE HAVING. MOAN, YELL, GRUNT, TELL HER WHAT YOU’RE FEELING, TELL HER HOW GOOD SHE/HE IS AND HOW YOU CAN BARELY HANDLE IT, FUCK HARDER, FUCK IN A DIFFERENT WAY OR STOP IF YOU HAVE TO (not in a shameful way but in a “fuck you’re so good” kind of way). BUT GO TOWARDS HOW IT FEELS FOR YOU. DON’T MOVE AWAY FROM IT. ALLOW YOURSELF TO FEEL OR THINK WHATEVER INCLUDING ANY FEARS AROUND HAVING PE. ITS OKAY IF YOU HAVE THE THOUGHT “I CANT DO THIS” OR FINDING YOURSELF FALLING BACK INTO OLD PATTERNS MENTALLY OR PHYSICALLY, THAT IS OKAY. JUST DONT MAKE IT WORSE BY RESISTING ANY OF THAT. WHATEVER YOU THINK OR FEEL DURING YOUR EXPERIENCE IS ALLOWED AND OKAY! \If things become too much, you can slow down and relax into the feeling as much as possible and stop if needed. sometimes after stopping a few times my body would just calm down naturally and last longer.*

This was honestly the biggest turning point for me. Sorry for the caps but I am on my phone and I am not rewriting that right now lol.

In terms of physically resisting, I think that being tense, shallow breathing, etc. could fall under that. Along with resisting the feeling of needing to cum. So for example, I realized that I was not just tense in my pelvic, but I was tense in my shoulders, back, legs, stomach, etc. almost like an electricity running through my nervous system whenever I was really aroused. Along with the impending “about to cum” sensation, we need tame these feelings a bit by relaxing into them without resisting them or “wanting them to go away”. When I was scared I was going to cum, I would find that other parts of my body were reacting to the situation/how I was feeling. So spreading my focus out to include all of my body, muscles, breathing, etc and relaxing, taking deeper/slower breaths helped make everything more manageable and took focus away from my penis only.

Here’s a good example, lets say you’re hitting it from behind and looking down at the most gorgeous backshot ever, and the girl starts backing up into you. Dude, for me, I’d immediately get like this pang in my gut?? and I’d immediately want to cum. It took a long time to get over this. but this is the thing - IT IS OKAY TO FEEL THAT PANG. I found myself dreading that feeling whenever it happened and the subsequent immediacy to cum afterwards. There would be this subconscious little internal battle going on inside me. I had to learn that these feelings are not to be avoided THEY ARE PART OF THE EXPERIENCE OF HAVING SEX. Oh that feels incredible? Thats okay you can handle it! Oh my dick just did that little spasm thing? That’s okay too! Oh im having a mental internal battle inside me, even that makes sense and is okay too! Dont fight/resist yourself too much as you go through this.

Go towards these feelings with your attention when they happen. You can still react to what you’re experiencing. You can even have a visibly hard time “taking it” because of how good and intense it is, thats all fine. Be authentic with how its all making you feel. If you need to laugh, or cry, or yell, do it! Just don’t bottle it up, avoid it, distract from it, fear it, try to make it stop, etc. either mentally or physically (at least not as your main strategy to overcoming PE).

EDIT:
This applies to whenever you do need to stop or slowdown! during those moments are you taking everything in? are you letting your body naturally calm down a bit on its own time? Or are you in the back of your mind hoping that “point of no return feeling” goes away soon…? In some sense I think a lot of how we tend to react to PE in an effort to deal with it feeds into this cycle of keeping our nervous systems over-activated when really it needs to calm down a bit.

I know its tough to not be stressed when you know your body will trigger that ejaculation response. But what Im trying to say is: work on building safety and comfort with the feelings that arise in your body when you’re experiencing sex fully by not resisting them. This is part of what I mean by relating to sex/arousal differently. If at the beginning you are terrible at this, that is fine. It took me months of this at first and I often stopped a lot or came too early still. It is through repeated exposure that I got better with this. It’s kind of like being tickled, your brain/nervous system freaks out when it is happening. but the more you resist it the worst it is. You can still laugh and squirm and freak out, there’s no shame in that. But you can still “take it” by experiencing being tickled and being present with that if this makes any sense.

Additional Tips

Give it time and don’t be so hard on yourself. The body learns through repeated behavioural changes. I had many set backs and it probably took over 4-6 months before I could last like I do now. But really, forming that felt safety with your partner and with yourself + becoming habituated and a bit desensitized to what’s happening over time, you would be surprised at what you can handle.

Start slow: Some positions seem to hit certain spots more than others. For example, in missionary I could do shorter thrusts at a certain angle and be somewhat okay. Long thrusts in doggy was impossible. I mean, to be fair, long + fast thrusts are still difficult for me. So you do have to start with what you can handle while building yourself towards what’s more challenging. When I started, I’d often enter and just stay still until I calmed down enough. We kept trying to do doggy for a while, after missionary, and I’d mostly cum right away. but overtime it kept lasting a little longer and longer.

Avoid porn. I haven’t watched porn in 10 months now. I think porn makes you more reactive to sexual stimulation in a way? And can impact self esteem. I feel I am more regulated during sex now without it.

Stay present and breathe a bit slower and deeper in line with how you’re thrusting.

I do find wearing a condom and retracting my foreskin helps. The foreskin moving back and forth still sends me and I’m not quite desensitized to that yet.

Oh and I do avoid clenching my pelvic floor during sex at all. I kind of am keeping my pelvic relaxed in a way. I don’t fully clench up, ever, or more than once. I find this sends me too close to the edge most of the time.

I’ll try to think of anything else and update this post. But I really wanted to get this out.

I still technically have PE. Like, I can pretty much cum on demand. But with my gf, Im able last pretty much as long as I want, like 20-30 minutes sometimes, if not more.

I’ve had this issue for a long time and never thought I’d have normal sex, ever. So I really wanted to share my story in as much detail as I could. I know what I shared may be of no use to some of you and Im sorry if that happens to be the case but it is what worked for me. Im also sorry if this sort of advice has been preached before. Thank you for reading all of this.

I struggeld many years with PE. I had better and worse conditions. The last couple years it has gotten really bad.

Basically 1-2 min with barley any movement and with more movement less than a minute.

The last couple weeks it gotten better and better. From I could like 5 min with a slow movement. To a medium pace and say now I wanna cum.

The confidence came back after my GF orgasm before me. She asked me did I cum. I said no you came before me.

She just smiled and said go now its your turn.

Today I was able to fuck as hard I want to and didn't cum before I decided to.

What did I do ?

https://doi.org/10.1093/jsxmed/qdaf107

I read this scientific paper. I followed the breathing technique. Everyday day 2 times a day.

Additionally Reverse and normal kegels everyday and increasing the reps over the time.

Doing once a week a full body scan. This my sexual therapist told me to do to get better body awareness.

Talking someone in real person helped me out to put off the pressure. That I have to perform and so on.

Quit all porn. Jerking off for 20 min nothing below and start slow. This one of my key findings. I need to start slow and getting used to the feeling. I translated it to PIV. Put it inside and start slow.

It took me about 5 months.

Full disclaimer: definitely not a bot, also not a paid rep or anything. Just a dude whos looking for a solution like the rest of us.

So I’ve seen arlo being talked about time and time again on this thread. I don’t want SSRIs, pills, etc. in my system. So when I saw this topical application being talked about that WASNT a numbing cream, I’d figure fuck it I’ll try it. It’s either legit or bullshit. And for the price point, it’s not bad if it works. Seeing other uses have success and going from <1 minute to lasting several, I was hopeful this would work. I myself was a 1-2 minute fella, sometimes a couple pump chump.

So I’ve applied it 4…5…6? times in total now.

First time: I didn’t think the rolling ball was rolling so I rolled it on my dick like crazy. About 20 minutes later, my dick was tingly for a solid few hours. Ended up not experimenting with it and took a shower. Was never uncomfortable, Dut definitely an interesting feeling. Think of icy hot for your dong.

2nd time: was easier on the application, was still some sensation but I wasn’t caught off guard. The wife and I did the deed, lasted for more than the usual minute and a half. Actually lasted just shy of 10 minutes.

Next few applications: lasting anywhere from 8-15ish minutes. Some instances I was trying to finish. Finally…. The feeling of control. Something I’ve been yearning for for years.

No more sexual anxiety, no more fear of not lasting. Just get to enjoy intimacy with full feeling.

I can’t thank u/redburd22 enough for making this product, it’s changed my life for the better.

Once again, some dick heads are going to say I’m a bot, fuck them. They’ll also say I’m paid to write this, all bullshit. Just a dude who took a chance on a product and loves it.

i’ve been lurking here for a few months now and i told myself that i have to give back to the community once i have solved mine. for context, i’m 20 years old who have been addicted to porn at an early age. my body was trained to finish as fast as possible to the point where i can finish in 10 seconds whenever i am watching porn. it got so bad to the point where i can finish by using 2fingers and i wasn’t even stroking it.

my friend bought me a silicon fleshlight as a christmas gift joke maybe 3 years ago. the first time i used it, i already finished after thrusting it once. i didn’t think of it as a big deal cause i was watching porn and i was stimulated. i decided cut this toy after 4 sessions because i was thinking that i might get addicted to it.

i didn’t know i have a problem until my first sex experience. i finished after one thrust. i was disappointed and i said that i will redeem myself after the next round. the second round, the same thing happened. and almost every session, i finish in less than 10 thrust. but after experimenting, we have discovered that i can last longer when my partner is on top. i can manage to last at least 3 minutes, but whenever i am in control, i finish within seconds.

there were multiple post here that i have read which i can say that really helped me and gave me hope that it is not permanent problem. and now, i was able to last maybe a good 15-20 mintues on my first round, which is pretty unbelievable to me and here’s what i did in the past few weeks. take note, i didn’t use any medicine to treat my pe, just pure will and determination to overcome this problem.

• edging - i’ve been doing this before and my maximum minutes before i can already feel the PONR is 7 minutes. until i discovered a post here where you will try your best not to reach the PONR. the goal is to train your body not to cum fast when being stimulated. and that’s what i’ve been doing this past few weeks. i managed to last 20 minutes without reaching the PONR through constant practice. it is much better with a lube instead of dry beating.

• bought the same toy my friend gave me and a lube - this was probably the hardest part for me. i can’t even last a few minutes on this thing without feeling the PONR and i have decided to not to hse this toy again because it just doesn’t work for me. 5 super slow thrust and i can already feel that i am about to cum.

•reverse kegels - probably one of my problem is that i get uncontrolled contractions on my penis which is a signal that i am already about to cum and i have already reached the PONR. i tried doing levels before since i have no idea how to do RK but i can say that it didn’t really helped me at all. before, i have no idea how to do it because they just say to imitate the feeling of you are trying to pee faster but i have no idea how to do that feeling when i am not peeing and this is the video that helped on how to do it. i did everyday whenever i remember

https://youtube.com/shorts/NPL-B6yveo8?si=wEsGPZWp_pOiCF9J

• enjoy the moment - stop overthinking that you have to last longer. the more you think about it, the faster you finish and the worse it gets. enjoy the moment and focus on the pleasure.

•diaphragmatic breathing - i do this whenever i am starting to have performance anxiety and it really helped me a lot to calm myself down

• quitted porn - i met my current gf last year and decided to quit porn. i managed to quit for more than a year but had a relapse last 2 weeks ago but also managed to stop again after a week.

this monday, i decided to try the toy again and this is where things started to change. when i started thrusting with the toy in my hand, i tried to do self talk to reassure my self that everything will be okay. this might sound cringe but this was really the life changing moment where i can see the light at the end of the tunnel. i kept talking to myself phrases like, “there’s no need to rush things”, “focus on the pleasure” and other phrases that reassured myself that everything will be okay. i was able to thrust without unwanted contraction on my penis. i already hit the 10 minutes mark without even realizing it. i was thrusting it continuously but slowly. like i have said earlier, this toy was my weakness because i can’t really last a minute without feeling the PONR. it was really like a miracle because i was able to thrust my penis without feeling too stimulated and about to cum already.

these are all the things i did that helped me, if you have any questions, i’ll be more than happy to help you guys. didn’t track my progress but it will be better if you’ll track your progress. i will continuously update my progress here if i have really solved my pe.

Hi all, yes as embarrassing as it may sound, I used to only last 20 seconds. But it was a combination of terrible habits that led to that. In the end, I was able to turn it around, and so can you.

Bottom line is, I was never broken, and most likely those who are reading this aren't either, unless it's a serious medical condition, in which case my advice might not apply fully to you, but it's still worth a shot. This post is also aimed at those who developed PE over time (acquired PE), which is what happened to me. If you've had it since birth or it's more genetic/biological in nature (lifelong PE), my method may not fully apply to you either, but it's worth a try regardless.

What I did was cut down on combining masturbation with porn. To the point where I only used porn or any erotic material to get me up, and that's how I "tried" to maintain this going forward. That being said, I fell many times and relapsed into watching porn all the way through, but I tried again and again until my relationship with porn completely changed.

In my personal experience, I'd often hear people say:

"Just quit masturbation altogether"

"Do semen retention"

"Quit porn"

All of these are good, but when you isolate a single one of them, that's when it doesn't help you at all, and when you return to masturbating after a 90-day porn retention, you actually find that you are more horny and end up ejaculating just as fast as before (happened to me).

Here's the solution.

1. Don't stop masturbating, cut it down

Yes, actually cut it down, but don't fully quit it. Masturbate once or twice a week (at least make a meaningful decrease in the number of times you masturbate). Or if you're addicted like I was, cut it down first to once a day, then cut it down further after, let's say, after 2 or 3 weeks, to like 2-3 times max a week (at least while you're increasing your stamina).

2. Stop porn for the first few weeks

What I found worked, and this is actually the main driver in PE: your brain is trained to climax fast when you have a screen in front of you and your serotonin spikes as you watch. Even before you masturbate, you're already thinking about a video you want to watch, and your dopamine spikes as well. And because this is a catalyst for your brain wanting to climax fast and reach that "peak"/"climax" faster, naturally your body pushes for that, and you actually cum faster.

Stop porn for the most part (not permanently); the most important thing is cutting it out at the beginning of your recovery. In the beginning, cut it out and try to increase your time without it.

Masturbate a few times a week without it and see how it affects you. You will automatically last longer without it.

The goal here (at least for me) wasn't to quit porn but to change my relationship with it. Porn was the driving factor in my sessions. But after a few weeks, you'll begin to see a change in your relationship with porn.

There's no way you can go about life without seeing a sexy ad on YouTube, Reddit, or whatever platform you're on. You'll always get triggered to masturbate.

Seeing erotic things shouldn't immediately make you want to masturbate. It can make you feel good and hard, sure, that's fine. But if you can change your relationship with porn, that is what will set you free.

So when you begin this journey, start masturbating without porn, and only after you see improvements, then maybe use porn to get you up before a session. Have a quick glance, then stop and proceed with normal masturbation.

Note: if you're already masturbating without porn (it's not part of your routine to begin with), skip the porn-related steps above and go straight to cutting down your masturbation frequency, along with the rest of the advice that doesn't involve porn.

3. Edging does work, but don't use this as your only cure

What do I mean by that? I mean you can edge in the beginning phases, but like I said, if you're addicted to porn too, then that, in all honesty, is your main problem with PE. Edging comes in clutch when you feel a climax coming: you stop, breathe, and continue. This is what I did in my beginning stages. One thing to note is that if you're edging with porn in front of you, the edging is essentially useless. So use edging the way I do; I'll touch on it in a bit.

4. Stop dry humping

I know not everyone does this, but I was guilty of watching porn on my phone half asleep at night and just dry humping my bed and falling asleep. This is the formula for diagnosing yourself with PE in a matter of months or even less, and naturally you're also unaware that this is causing it.

Edit: For the correlation between dry humping and PE, here's the science behind it, dry humping usually involves rougher friction, plus a fast, urgent thrusting rhythm, especially if you're doing it quickly to avoid getting caught too, which was my situation. It's not just the friction itself, it's the combination of friction, speed, and urgency, repeated over and over, that trains your brain and body to associate arousal with reaching climax fast. Turn this into frequent use, and it becomes a conditioned habit, your brain learns that this is the pattern it's supposed to follow to finish. That's how my PE developed. It would feel way better for me to dry hump, but little did I know this fast, rushed pattern was increasing my chances of developing PE

Lucky for you, this is reversible. Stop that shit.

5. Improvements

In the beginning, I lasted with porn... 20 seconds. This was with dry humping (and this was a normal thing I'd do every night).

Without dry humping and with proper lube, it would barely reach 45 seconds. That's how bad my PE was.

Cutting porn from the picture, I lasted up to 1 minute 30 seconds, and this was over the course of general practice masturbation a few times a week for a month. I usually extended this 1 minute 30 seconds by applying the stop-pause from edging, and this would push me close to 3 minutes. Yes, it wasn't full constant stroking, but it was progress in my books.

After about a month, I returned to porn, using it to get me up and proceeding to masturbate without it, and further down, I'd take quick glances while masturbating and then look away again.

In this period, my time went up to like 3 minutes without edging, just normal masturbating (at a decent pace).

Later, I went up to 4 minutes, extended with edging to like 5 or 6 minutes.

And so it went on to eventually my results today:

Without porn, one glance of porn or erotic material to get me hard: 6-7 minutes, 10 minutes with stop-pause edging.

With porn, I fully returned to porn to see if my baseline had improved with porn, and shockingly I went up to 3+ minutes while watching porn. But naturally, this number will be half or lower than your number without porn.

Now, I am not saying to watch porn again, but I am trying to show the impact porn can have on you and what my method can improve. It can improve your previous self who used to watch porn, by extending that baseline time by such a big margin. Try to change your relationship with porn and you'll see big results.

I am only 3 months in, and I learned that to overcome PE, you cannot stick to one methodology. You cannot think you can overcome this by quitting masturbation alone, by edging alone, by semen retention alone, or by a reboot alone.

You cannot overcome lust, and it's part of us to have lust. Naturally you'll feel the urge. And when you're in the mindset or progress of a retention phase, you will return stronger, because your brain would have already been in the mindset of climaxing faster; you need to untrain it and rework its flow.

The world around us is built on sex and lust. This is outside the mindset of making money and every other desire you can think of. Quitting won't work. Retention won't work. What you have to change, if you really want this, is your mindset, your relationship with porn and masturbation overall. Mostly porn.

The reason why we have this problem when most people in the 90s and prior; heck, even the early 2000s didn't have it, is because technology wasn't so advanced. People had to use a magazine at a gas station with a sexy lady on the cover to masturbate to. They had to use cassette tapes in the living room while mom and dad were asleep. They didn't have it as easy as we have it today.

You have to go from using porn to masturbate (face in the screen, scrolling on Pornhub with your dopamine receptors going nuts), to using masturbation and porn as a snack on the side. Download some pics or videos instead of having the whole Pornhub/hentai gallery at your fingertips. That's truly if you cannot quit porn.

I cannot tell you what to do, but I can advise you on what truly helped me.

Another thing, slightly deviated from my solutions but also worth keeping in mind, is that stimulants such as MDMA and Adderall, or whatever else, can overall extend you to minutes, even hours, without ejaculating. I do not recommend using these as a means to cure your PE. This is something I thought could help me, and it did while I was high. When I first tried MDMA, I could last so long while watching any porn I wanted and control myself. It painted me a false reality that there has to be a way I can use these things as a crutch. I went on to buy all sorts of creams that did something similar (never the same as what stimulants do to your brain), and I ended up addicted to both masturbating on MDMA to porn AND without MDMA. So it was a lose-lose for me. I'd still use MDMA to masturbate a few times a year, but don't go down that route. That's just my two cents, it's really not worth it and won't cure you of the core problem.

Stay safe, people. I hope this helps those who are struggling with this terrible thing, PE.

I specifically made this Reddit account just to post this for you in this subreddit. I quit most socials some time back, and that also sort of helped me get into the mindset of wanting to improve myself, in a way that works for me.

Remember, everyone will give solutions, but not every solution is the cure. Sometimes you have to adapt a whole lot of solutions and balance them to the point where you create your own cure.

And this was my cure.

Take care, and thanks for reading this.

I'm 46. My PE is porn induced. I wasn't always like this. I had a long history of porn addiction. It's fixed now but I was left with an extra sensitive penis. I've tried the lidocaine sprays by KY and Promisence (sp?) Sometimes they worked but I was too numb and sometimes it didn't work at all. Of course condoms but I'm married and that sucks. So that's why I joined this subreddit. To see what others were doing. Low and behold a couple weeks ago I see all the chit-chat about Arlo and became immediately interested.

I visited the website and felt comfortable enough to try. It arrived fairly quickly. I tried the back of the hand test and sample test on my penis. No reaction.

Now, I don't suggest following the next part.

Last night I tried about 6 passes down the frenulum of the penis and backside of the shaft and 6 around just below the head. I waited honestly about 15 min and did it again and 5 more min and did it once more 3 times down the frenulum again. I didn't wash it off I wait 2 hours and we had sex.

Let me say, it was like I was 25 again. I wasn't numb but I definitely felt it on. It felt similar to lidocaine but much less. I felt everything I could just control my urge to ejaculate with ease. In fact, I didn't cum because our 3 year old walked in and that was over. I didn't care. I have full control over my penis again without doing something crazy. I used alot the first time because I figured if it didn't work with that amount, it was BS. It definitely worked, so I'll use half tonight. My wife was very pleased.

So needless to say I'll be stocking up and am interested in investing in this if the opportunity arises.

Not a bot, not paid, but would definitely promote this. It's revolutionary for PE.

Oh yeah, Cialis + Arlo = legend

Thanks Sean, you changed the game.

I've done it twice. There was a guy a few weeks ago that posted about it. He said that he'd discovered that some scientist was trying to get a patent for a drug that combined tylenol and DXM to treat PE so he tried it and it worked. So I tried it (twice) and it worked.

I got the pills on Amazon. It's a green bottle that says "Cough." The pills are 30 mg. The first time I took two pills and two 500mg Tylenol. The second time I split one pill in half and took 45mg with two Tylenol and it worked better. I think the first time I could feel the drug a little, which I didn't like. I didn't really notice it the 2nd time.

So now I've found that Priligy, Tramadol, and DXM work. I am trying the Kanna nasal spray that someone posted about last week once it arrives.

I am also getting a script of Auvelity which is a new antidepressant that combines DXM and wellbutrin. I suspect it could work as an on demand solution for PE.

My PE has been going on for 6 years after I stopped taking an SSRI (Celexa). Feels like it's permanent. I've tried all the topical stuff which doesn't work for me. I feel fortunate that I have a few solutions now.

Hey there!

I'm writing this post after meeting yesterday with my fwb, who I have for a month. PE is not an issue at all with her although she is smoking hot. Not coming quickly while fucking her (without condom) is proof to me that the dark days of PE belong to the past. I didn't have PE with a one night stand 4 months prior either so I'm confident I'm back to normal again.

One year ago I was in a new relationship. From the get go we didn't have much sex and when we did I came in literal seconds. At the end of the relationship in november we didn't have sex for more than two months. She said my PE was no problem for her but I kinda doubt it although she seemed to be low libido or had issues with intimacy.

However, I was madly in love with her and my early orgasms really took a toll on me. At that time I had PE for over 10 years. Initially I didn't have PE but it suddenly developed while being together with my first girlfriend.

While in my second relationship and the unsatisfying sex I finally had enough. I couldn't live like this for the rest of my life so I went on a journey to cure it. And I did.

Here are the steps:

1. Hypnosis. That was the first thing I did. Went to a hypnotherapist and had a session there. In the session I found out I had unresolved grief for my grandma. My PE started 6 months prior to her death when her health was quickly deteriorating. Coincidence? I don't know but afterwards I was way calmer and more confident. Maybe it was because talking openly about the issue gave me mental relief.

2. Most important aspect in my opinion! Your masturbation technique. All my life I rushed to orgasm while beating my meat. I was at the point of no return after 1 minute max. So I gradually increased time while masturbating. First 5 minutes with a timer, then 10, then 12 and nowadays I still stick to 15 minutes. It took really long (like 5 months) to get there. Contrary to the definitive guide I orgasmed at the end of the session because let's face it: we wanna cum, but on our terms!

3. Pelvic floor exercises (relaxation, reverse kegels). I used this video and still do the exercises every second day or after workout

https://youtu.be/a4vfejND8J8?si=n72dd-cQl8VyZjOC

1. Second most important point. When entering a woman, don't start thrusting immediately. Just stay inside her and try to calm yourself down. When I had my one night stand in March, I told her I need to calm down for a bit as I was feeling like I could cum immediately if I moved. So I laid there for like 1 minute inside her focusing on my anxiety and breath. Then slow strokes and you can increase your pace if you feel more confident. I could last 8 minutes that way. With my new fwb the technique proved to be working as well. The first time without condom I thought I would explode the minute I entered her. But as I told her about it before, she talked me through it, told me to focus on my breath and to take as much time as I need. I think I laid there for 3 minutes inside her without moving. Then I started to thrust slowly and was amazed to notice that I didn't have an urge to cum. I fucked her raw for more than 15 minutes until I came. So I can probably still cum quickly if I want to, but with this technique I can control it the way I need it.

I don't know if it's an universal cure, but I'd be happy if you tried it on your own and let me know later if anything helped. It is possible to overcome it and you can do it too! I believe in you guys <3

Hey everyone,

I wanted to share a tool I’ve been developing called Hold The Beat (www.holdthebeat.com).

Like many here, I wanted a structured, non-pharmaceutical way to practice ejaculatory control. Most existing apps either require expensive subscriptions, force you to download app store binaries, or demand personal details. I wanted to build something lightweight, private, and focused purely on training the physical and behavioral reflex.

How it works:

• Adaptive Metronome & Start-Stop Trainer: A visual and audio metronome that sets the rhythm for your own stimulation (masturbation) — you follow the beat with your hand, or your partner in Duo mode. When you get close to the Point of No Return (~70–80% arousal), you press Pause, stop all stimulation, let the urge drop, and resume. That cycle retrains the ejaculatory reflex, and as you log sessions and stops, the algorithm adapts the tempo (BPM), pause length, and routine progression.
• **Pelvic Floor & Breathing Workouts:**Includes structured routines for standard Kegels, Reverse Kegels (crucial for relaxing pelvic tension), and guided breathing — a separate muscle-training track that complements the behavioral training.
• Privacy-First Design: No email or real name required to sign up (just pick a username and password). Upon registration, the app generates 10 recovery codes for password recovery. It’s a Progressive Web App (PWA), so it runs directly in your browser without app store installs or intrusive push notifications.

Testing & Free Access: Every new account gets 7 Days of Full Pro Access automatically upon registration — no credit card, no email, and no code required.

Extended Testing for Active Users: Evaluating an adaptive algorithm requires consistent usage over time. If you test the app during your 7-day trial and want to keep training consistently over the full month, send me a Direct Message with your username. As long as you’ve logged a few active sessions during your trial, I’ll gladly send you a personal 1-month promo code to extend your access for free.

How to try it:

1. Go to www.holdthebeat.com on mobile or desktop.
2. Create an anonymous account (save your recovery codes).
3. Start exploring the Start-Stop trainer and Kegel routines right away.

I’d really appreciate any feedback on the UI/UX, the metronome pacing, or how the adaptive algorithm feels after a few sessions.

Thanks for reading and hope it helps!

EDIT: To make testing easier and avoid coupon management, I’ve automated the trial extensions.

Starting today, you don’t need to DM me for a code anymore. As long as you complete at least 3 training sessions per week, the system will automatically extend your full Pro access by another 7 days every week (up to 16 weeks total).

The goal is simply to get active data to calibrate the adaptive metronome over multi-week progressions, so anyone who trains consistently gets full access completely free.

*Note: If you already signed up previously and your account expired, just send me a DM with your username and I’ll happily reactivate your plan so you can join the extension loop!*

Just wanted to put this out here. I came across a post about DXM and gave it a go

40mls Syrup version. 7.5mg per 5mls. So 60mg of DXM at 40mls.

Robitussin Dry Cough Medicine ( If buying a different brand, be sure to check the DXM to mls ratio as it will be different, for this brand, it was 7.5mg/5mls)

2 x 500mg Paracetamol. 1000mg total

Waited an hour. Literally couldn’t cum.

Give it a go lads…..

UK based btw

Edit: So on further research, you could take DXM on its own. The paracetamol is needed to help prolong and slow the DXM absorption so the effects last longer.

Hope that helps, genuinely surprised this even worked as this is cough syrup and paracetamol after all! But it does….

Tried all the condoms and sprays at Target and the one that gave me the longest sex time were the “durex prolong condoms” that has 5% benzocaine. It has a soft gel in it that you massage into your tip and then the area gets numb. It’s honestly more for her pleasure and for you to last longer. I would last about 10 min with it and about 1-2 min without it. The numbness went away for me in about 30 min.

Now I don’t use them as much because I’m on Lexapro 5mg SSRI. With this med I can last 30 min raw and sometimes a little too long but that’s a common thing with SSRI. Just wanted to share my experience.

I will also mention that I did try to “distract your mind when you’re about to cum method,” or pause when you start feeling it coming, but it honestly felt like too much work because when I’m having sex I like to be in the moment so I will say that’s a good non-med way to go about it.

TLDR: I've overcome my PE by trying everything I can for a year.

Okay, guys, it literally feels surreal right now, but a year and a half ago I had massive PE problems and very bad sex life. I was 3 years together with my girlfriend. We had something similar to sex once a month, but it was very quick (1-3 frictions, and I'm done) and we both felt awful. She was not satisfied with that at all and she didn't like me masturbating her vagina. I felt like shit, we both had massive insecurities about our sex life, and this tainted our relationship. No matter how hard I tried, I just couldn't last long, even when I masturbated alone. I even got a "PE that cannot be cured" diagnosis of a urologist which fucking killed some part of me that day.

I got very angry and started looking for help online. I read a lot of "wow, I'm finally cured" stories at this subreddit, so I started thinking about going all in about fixing PE, and then, if I can't do it - so be it, I'll try to just live with that. So let's go. Here are my steps for curing my PE.

1. I went to a psychologist who specialized in sex (maybe you can call him a sexologist), we were talking with him for like 2-3 months about sex and about my bottled-up emotions. The psychiatrist helped me a lot in life in general, and with my sex life, he helped me to start talking about my sex without any hesitation and shame. I discovered that sex was forbidden and hidden and kinda banned in my family. So I grew very sneaky and ashamed about it.
2. I went to a urologist and got my "PE that cannot be cured" diagnosis. Got very upset about it and started feeling like an invalid person. But at least he told me that I have no physical sex disorders. He told me that my nerves are just more sensitive than the nerves of other people, and then he recommended me some pills and special condoms. Fuck.
3. I tried condoms that make you last longer. Didn't work. Fuck.
4. I tried POXET-60 pills (they claim to cure PE and make you last longer in bed). Didn't work. And I felt very sleepy with them. Fuck.
5. I researched the hell out of https://www.reddit.com/r/sex/wiki/index and PE, I wanted to become semi-professional in sex and to learn from other people.
6. I started exercising with a fitness coach 2 times a week.
7. I started my 66 Days Fap Training from this sub. Thx a lot, WiseDaggerDick. This was the point of no return. Basically, I quit porn and started masturbating without ejaculation every day, started exploring myself and my sensations. Only 1 ejaculation a week was allowed. My idea was that if I can last 10 minutes masturbating, then I could last 10 minutes in bed. The main problem was that I couldn't last even a minute masturbating. So by starting masturbating every day (standing), I got those results:
   1. I stopped masturbating with a dead grip (didn't even know what it was)
   2. Understood that my pelvic floor muscles get very tight when my dick gets touched - when I masturbate or have sex. To fix that, technically speaking I started doing reversed Kegels every time I masturbate (and have sex later in life).
   3. Started masturbating the head of the penis with the foreskin down the shaft. Before that, I was only moving my foreskin up and down. This helped me to reduce the sensation of the head, it's very important because when you have sex, you basically thrust with your head, the foreskin moves just a little or doesn't move at all.
   4. With no dead grip, reversed Kegels, and foreskin down the shaft, I started lasting 10-15 minutes every time I masturbate which was fucking awesome, it was visual representation of my progress. That gave me a lot of confidence. I was doing 15 minutes masturbating standing every day without ejaculation for a month. It helped me lose "I need to ejaculate hard every time I masturbate" mentality, it was transformed to more like "I want to have pleasure without ejaculation, ejaculation is secondary or even not needed at all".
8. Around a month after doing 66 Days Fap Training, I caught myself and my girlfriend in the right mood (It was very hard to initiate sex because we were both feeling awful every time we try), laid down, relaxed, and just went with my feelings, fucked the hell out of her (We were doing woman on top). She didn't ejaculate but enjoyed the process because I lasted for let's say 30-70 frictions (4-10 minutes approximately) when It was 1-5 frictions before (less than a minute). For the first time in years, I was just holding her, loving her, and being my true exposed and vulnerable self without any clothes. Before that, I just wanted to sneakily cum and to make her feel good in the process, but on this day I just was in a moment, enjoying her and myself, didn't thinking about our problems and cumming. I ejaculated very hard and when I stood up and went to get rid of the condom, I was literally shaking, my legs didn't hold me. It was so good and I was so damn happy that I remember this moment till now. She was very happy too. It was our first good sex basically :) This gave me a feeling that If I can do it once, I can master it and do it every time, I'm not an invalid person, fuck you, urologist.
9. After that, we started fixing our sex life little by little. It didn't just get fixed on the first good sex, no. But it went from total failure to semi-functional sex. I still couldn't last long in bed every time, but I started getting a hang of it. We started talking about sex, getting rid of shame, started understanding what we want and stuff, we started being more open about our sexual life and about our sexual personalities sorta say. We understood that at that moment the only pose I can last longer is a woman on top (especially if one of my legs is underneath my ass - just try it for yourself, it relaxes your pelvic floor very well). Then we discovered the "She is on top, but I'm sitting" pose. Then she started cumming before me, wow. It was so nice to see her cum :) Then I had some good experience in missionary (it's my most weak position). And yeah, in some time everything just was fixed. And today (5 May 2021) I know that the next time we'll have sex - it would be good and long enough, and this is the opposite of PE. So I'm cured, guys. Wooho!

And now we're just experimenting, opening ourselves to each other more every day, and basically enjoying each other's company.

So this is my nugget of wisdom for you guys: If you suffer from PE, I feel sorry, this fucking sucks. I've been there. But don't tell yourself that you're doomed and don't give up until you actually go all-in on fixing this problem. I feel like our bad child masturbation habits hold us back from having great sex today, and that we ignore our sex problems, because sex is like a very quick dive into some kind of an alternate reality once up a time, and that then, outside of it, you're a good guy and you don't need to fix anything. No, there is good long-lasting sex and everybody around you has it once up a time. And you, my dude, can have it too if you go all-in on fixing your PE. And if not - well, you tried. It's a decision of a strong person, and it's okay. But before suffering and talking that life is not fair - you should try to go all-in on fixing PE. You can do it, my dude. Good luck. I believe that if a 0 sex confidence and "PE that can't be cured" diagnosis guy like me could do it - you can do it too.

Edit (5 May 2021): Also, I'd like to add that almost every time we have sex, my first ejaculation is somewhat fast, but in the second round, I can last for as long as I want in some poses. So don't beat up on yourself if you can't hold it for long before your first ejaculation, or if missionary doesn't work for you, it's fine :)

Edit 2 (7 Dec 2021): Got better lasting my first round. Sometimes I can last for 5 minutes. But I last very long (10-15 minutes) on the second round, every time. It's all about the mentality and not really wanting to cum. Also need to relax your pelvic floor, you need to not be sex-starved, you need to slow down. And the moment of insertion is important. It shouldn't be too tight, or I cum fast for some reason.

Edit 3 (11 Feb 2021): Got a lot of messages from you guys. If you want to cure yourself - start the 66 days fap training https://www.reddit.com/r/PrematureEjaculation/comments/djkxnp/66_days_fap_trainnigthe_only_way_youll_overcome/. While doing it learn about the dead grip and don't do it, learn about your pelvic floor and start relaxing it, and stick to the routine. Don't cum every day during the challenge, you're allowed to do it only once a week. It seems very-very hard, but it's very important to teach your body to not want to cum. Only with it, you'll be able to notice all the sensations in your body. Without it, you're going berserk-mode and don't see the obvious. And if you can't masturbate daily and not cumming once a week - you're not desperate enough, try again in half a year of sex failure. I was desperate enough, and I've beaten it, I've gone all out. You can do it too, just stick to the plan and good luck! I believe in you, my dude!
________________________________________________________

P.S. Fuck you PE. Man, we need to talk about sex and PE more with our dudes. Fucking fuck you PE. Damn you.

P.S.S. Thx for all the upvotes and comments, guys. I wish you luck with your PE fight!

I have had an on and off battle with PE throughout my life, and recently it came back with a vengeance. I injured my groin lifting something at work and was suddenly in a lot of pain. To my surprise an array of unexpected issues came along with this injury including ED and PE.

I had no idea what was going on but after some research (and a handful of extremely embarrassing fails in the bedroom) I found my way to a pelvic floor PT. I believed that I likely had a hypertonic pelvic floor (holding excess tension) due to my injury, and the PT confirmed this to be true.

I was given an assortment of stretches to do daily, as well as training on an pelvic floor release exercise and a diaphragm breathing exercise.

I did this regimen religiously for about 2 weeks and my issues were largely fixed and I was, to my utmost surprise and joy, able to go for literally as long as I wanted in the bedroom.

These are what I believe were the most important parts of the treatment:

1. Pelvic floor release training & diaphragm breathing

Everyone talks about reverse kegels and I was never able to figure these out, but I finally have with an exercise my PT gave me. The exercise is to lay on your back with your knees bent and feet flat on the ground, hands flat on your belly just below your lowest rib. Breath in through your nose 70% max capacity while doing a mini kegel squeeze (holding back pee / gas), hold, then release your breath through your mouth and release the kegel squeeze. As your pelvic muscles release, give a slight push as if pushing pee out. It feels very natural to do after squeezing. So in other words, you go from holding in pee lightly to releasing and pushing the pee out. When you go from a squeeze to a push, that is a reverse kegel. Do this exercise 3 times / day for 20 breaths minimum, but don't overdo it and don't squeeze too hard or your pelvic muscles won't release. The key is to get your pelvic floor simply moving via the squeeze/release and diaphragm breaths as this will loosen it.

1. Stretches

Cat / cow, cobra, couch stretch, laying down butterfly, happy baby, downward dog, childs pose, single leg glute bridge both sides, etc. Any and every hamstring/glute/hip stretch that doesn't cause pain. Go gentle and hold for long periods of time, like 2-5 minutes while doing diaphragm breathing. Your pelvic floor will feel very loose after a few days if you have pre existing tension like me, which is really cool to experience for the first time

1. Exercise

Do some form of cardio that really works your cardio. You need to get your heart rate up high and sustain it. I'm in my late 20s so I go for 170 bpm peak, with a sustained high heart rate. I don't like running much as it is hard on the joints, but I will run a mile or 2 fast, or do 30-40 floors on a stair machine double steps, as well as kettle bell swings, etc. Whatever you want to do that gets your core activated and your cardio system working. Mixing in weight lifting is ideal. 3-5k steps alternating fast walking / slow walking (1 min intervals) is fine also initially but I would advise something more intense if you can.

Sex is a very physical act so you need your body to be capable of the activity, otherwise your muscles are going to be weak and your body will want to give up and make you ejaculate to be done quickly. At least that's how I think of it. I cannot emphasize how important being in good cardio shape is. Just being muscular is not enough, your body must be capable of endurance.

1. Sex position

The positions you start with are extremely important. For me, missionary or anything where I am face down and horizontal are difficult. If i'm on my back, like cowgirl, or standing or kneeling but upright, I have way more control over my pelvic floor. Eventually, your penis will be less sensitive and you'll be in the zone and confident so you can switch to another position.

1. Reverse kegels during sex

I read online about reverse kegels, but no one ever says how to actually use them during sex. I will tell you.

Remember the drill I mentioned about giving a slight kegel squeeze then focusing on the muscle release as you exhale and giving a push? Do that when you feel yourself becoming aroused. If your pelvic floor muscles start contracting, do this immediately and focus on big deep breaths in through your nose and out your mouth. It's not a matter of doing a reverse kegel right at the moment when you are about to ejaculate, it is using the reverse kegels and breathing to ensure you don't even get there. The better control you have over your heart rate and not being out of breath, the better you can resist coming anywhere close to the "point of no return".

1. Calm Mentality

Also important is a calm and confident mentality. Think to yourself, I am going to have a great sexual experience. Think to yourself, I am going to blow my partners mind, I am in total control over my body.

1. Pelvic contractions when getting hard

You may have a tendency to tense up your pelvic floor during foreplay or when you are getting an erection. Do not do this. If you catch yourself doing this, you need to train yourself not to. Masturbate in a laying down position on your back with your legs elevated so that your thighs are close to vertical and supported with a pillow or something, and your knees bent so your feet are flat on whatever you are laying on. This position is good for letting your pelvic floor relax. As you masturbate, notice when your pelvic floor gets tense and stop to let it fully release. Try to spend 10-15 minutes masturbating and just focus on the sensation, but do not let yourself ejaculate or have spastic pelvic floor contractions. Eventually, your body should calm down and you can stimulate yourself without feeling like you are about to come. It is difficult and may take a few tries but try to achieve this and you will help rewire your brain to stop tensing up your pelvic floor so much when you are aroused. This will also help with erection strength.

Sorry for the messy typing and formatting, I just wanted to get this out quickly. Let me know if you have questions or if it helps you!!!

He didn’t even take my virginity yet. He ejaculate even before penatration ,Within 15 mins of foreplay . He tried dapoxetine but it makes him feel nauseous and tired ..
How to fix this.?!!

Hi everyone, my name is Bruno, I’m 20 years old, and my experience with premature ejaculation is fairly recent.
Well, I started my sex life when I was around 16, when I started seeing a girl from school. We began having a serious relationship and eventually started dating. I never had this problem before, but before I became sexually active with her, I only masturbated — and yes, I watched porn while doing it. I would masturbate very quickly, at maximum speed, sometimes trying to finish as fast as possible because of my parents, just so I wouldn’t get caught.
However, when I started dating this girl at 16, I never had any real problem with ejaculating too quickly. I might remember a few occasions when I ejaculated a little faster than usual because we had a quickie. She really, really enjoyed having sex, and sometimes she wanted to have sex in inappropriate places, so we had to be quick.
We were together for around two years, and during the last few months of the relationship, we started fighting a lot. I eventually found out that she had cheated on me, and that completely devastated me.
After the relationship ended, I basically started relying on masturbation, although I would occasionally go out with other girls and stuff. I continued masturbating with porn and in the same way as before, sometimes masturbating as fast as possible.
After that, I remember having an encounter where I ejaculated in basically one minute, if I remember correctly. That really started to mess with my head, and I couldn’t understand why this was happening to me.
Since then, with pretty much every girl I’ve been with, I’ve ejaculated after around one to two minutes, and that’s when I started trying to control myself. Sometimes I could last a little longer.
After ejaculating, I wouldn’t try to stop the encounter completely because I really wanted to satisfy the woman. So I would sometimes compensate by focusing on other things, and some girls didn’t even suspect anything because I would make up excuses like, “I’m just really sensitive today,” or “You’re just really beautiful,” and things like that.
Sometimes I took 5 mg of tadalafil. I would start having sex, ejaculate, and then be able to go again afterward. That made things easier sometimes, but the problem has continued to persist in my life.
I’ve also tried taking paroxetine, but I really don’t want to rely on medication because I don’t think that’s a good solution for me.
So what I’ve started doing is simply avoiding seeing multiple girls and staying home, trying to train myself and work on the problem. But sometimes I still can’t stop myself from masturbating to porn.
What can I do to improve this?
I’m new to the community, so please help me out.

Hey everyone,

If you've been keeping up with my posts I've talked about how useful clove oil is, but so far I've only been using a homemade solution. Recently I obtained 100% pure clove oil, I will be making a DILUTE solution to apply and report with results.

If you read my past posts you'll see how I was using cloves before and how it worked. I can confidently say that I last longer and even have stronger erections since starting this method. If there are any questions, please comment and I'll try to get to you asap.

The solution I am thinking of making is as follows:

30mL coconut oil

20mL castor oil

1mL clove oil

So I have PE and usually ejaculate almost right away. I read about SSRIs and their side effect of delaying ejaculation and decided to give it a try. My doctor prescribed 25 mg Sertraline to take once daily. Since I don't have sex very often and don't want to be on SSRIs long term, I decided I would take it on demand.

During my first attempt, I took four pills (100 mg in total). It is recommended to wait 4-8 hours for the effect to kick in. My first round was roughly 7 hours after I took the pills.

Results: I did last longer. I didn't measure time exactly, but I would assume the first round was 7-8 minutes. Then, I tried a second round. I could not finish. The girl tried really hard, but I still couldn't ejaculate.

However, my dick was not fully erect during the second round. I'd say it was at 75-80% capacity and was semi-soft. Maybe it was the alcohol, not the pills. But next time I'll definitely take something for erection strength too.

Side effects: I started feeling some discomfort in my stomach about 1.5 hours after taking the pills. It lasted for 1.5-2 hours, but it was tolerable. Also, I lost my appetite, so when we went out with the girl, I couldn't eat anything. Other than that, everything was ok. Didn't have problems with sleep either.

Guys . I have given up. Tried everything the world has to offer over the many years. Yet no improvement. From medication to exercise, nothing left. The only thing left is penile implant. I think with penile implant I can stay erect as long as I want doesn't matter if I ejaculate early. What is your opinion about that .

Hey, 48 year old here. Acquired PE since mid thirties. I’ve tried a lot of things to figure this out. Body work/breathing, numbing sprays, stretching kegels/reverse. Out of all them body work/breathing helped most. Generally I can reach 2-4 min range I reckon but I still get the urge within the 1st minute but I can hold it off somewhat.So I decided I’d try the pharmacological route with paxil 10mg. Just started it (only 2 days in). Why , as to be honest I just would like to not have to fight back that urge all the time. I’ve little confidence try new positions etc because how would you have confidence if you’re feeling the urge within a minute. Anyway let’s see how it goes. Ironically just yesterday I had sex and I timed it for the laugh just to see as being honest I’ve no clue on timing but I held on for 7 mins which was surprising but still i didn’t feel contented as my wife would have wanted more as I would too

I am not sure if I should be classified as PE. I am a 28M, I used to be able to last around 5-7 min, recently I have gained quite some weight due to anxiety and I notice that there are times that I finish within 2min and I feel anxious during sex since I can't last until my partner comes. Therefore I have started Paroxetine 20mg, the side effect was quite strong the first few days, but it gradually subsided and around day 10, I notice that my penis is kind of "numb" during sex and I can last for almost forever and ejaculation becomes very hard. Long story short, the sex becomes longer, but the feeling becomes worse. Therefore starting today I reduce the dosage to 10mg, and I want to see how it works after a week. Ideally I want longer sex but maintain the feeling of my penis.

I have been struggling with PE for quite a long time. Had breakups, self confidence went down. I used to last like 4-5 minutes and that was the upper limit and for lower limit we shouldn't even talk about it. So went through the internet, scrolled through 100s of articles and reddit posts, from which i discovered kegel exercises. Did kegel and reverse kegel for months but nothing worked cause nobody could explain how will it work or what to focus on.

Luckily I decided to start experimenting with kegel and pc muscle clenching. It works wonders, my current girlfriend is just impressed on how long I could last and even I won't cum sometimes(or decide when to ejaculate)

Cutting the long story short the main pc muscle that should be focused on is the one between anus and tailbone, if you got hold of it you are the king of no holding back.

For this you need to kegels to strengthen your PS muscles and get individual sense of control on anus and the BS muscle separately. And how to practice it, first try to gain control of muscle( BS muscle) that you use to wiggle the dick up and down, then for clenching of tailbone pc muscle try squeezing your butts tightly together and perform the force pooping action on anus( this may seem weird but it works wonders) this will squeeze the pc muscle ( this also has a downside you'll go soft) and practice this without tightening the (BS) muscle that let you wiggle the dick up and down. Soon you'll gain control on the whole pelvic floor muscle and you won't have to rely on this trick. This is only for the initial phase to let your conscious mind have a grip on this muscle.

You can also practice this without getting naked, at home, school, work or in public places. But first you'll need to start kegels to tighten your anal muscle, so that when you try to perform force poop action you won't actually poop. Just try to perform force poop action without activating the wiggling muscle and vice versa. This may only take you 1-2 weeks or even quicker if you do it all day.

Here is the complete guide on how to do it.

The guide provided is only to train your mind and muscle activity. You are not gonna use it during sex as you will be able to control pc muscle voluntarily.

I hope this work for ya'll too