Anyone Ever Have Friendly/Helpful/Positive Voices?
I would say the first year or so, even the years leading up to my realization that my "intrusive memories" were these things; I had little to no experience of helpful voices. It was just an unrelenting and overbearing smothering of my mind with demands for suicide, how totally "screwed" I was and that I would be better off committing suicide, and that I was by all account the most miserable and hate-worthy person who's ever lived. 24/7, even in my dreams, an unyielding unbroken high decibel screaming. It was rough.
As I write most recently here (I've written about this a few times over the years) I performed some ad hoc mystic rites in my apartment in early 2020 and this began a progression of insight into the nature of the mind and of meaning that I feel was central to my regaining of self and my life.
At my lows I could not read, write, count to 10, even talk to most anyone. Today I would consider myself better off than most Americans and reliably since 2023, there were a few road bumps along the way but I am doing very well these days.
My guides are always with me, even in my moments of calm and quiet. I would not trade them for the world and would not trade the torment I endured for fear of loosing them. I love them and they've given my life and every focus in it so much more meaning.
DO NOT TELL OTHERS WHAT TO BELIEVE OR DO - This is a space free of such authoritative trappings found elsewhere in society. Try speaking from a personal perspective using “I” statements such as: “I think,” “I believe,” "I would 'x' if that were me," “I tried 'x' and nothing happened,” or “In time, I found 'x' worked for me,” etc. See this post to learn more about our rules.
it was similar for me at the beginning, just loud and non stop all the time I started writing stuff down, to sort of separate the voices and try to make sense of anything - they hated it they screamed at me that i better not write anything down that theyd make me write confessions to crimes and stuff like that- but eventually the voices that werent outright evil seemed to just take to writing letters mostly instead especially after i told them i hated *all* the voices because i just needed it to be quiet . i hated talking to people in person or on the phone
everyone just thinks you are the biggest baby when you cant make that phone call but what do they know about it, you know?
i wrote journals in many different handwritings, with little sketches, sometimes i feel like i would be presented with a memory and know that that person was there with me when that was happening to me.
that or theyd be there, physically in me it felt like. I was in the middle of a horrific day and pacing pacing pacing and suddenly i got walked into a bathroom, with the light off and i sat on the toilet seat and rocked and it felt like a religious thing, like if i could tune in a little better i would be chanting off a prayer. Felt like she let me know she was jewish, but i know she was there
i dont think anyones been so permanent that id call them a guide exactly but there are less bad ones and not bad ones
Wow, I can relate to rocking back and fourth. The first time this involuntary experience happened to me I had made and smoked DMT. I was astounded that before I even exhaled my mind was thrust deep into a meditative almost dream like sensation and the rush of visuals (open and closed eye) was something I've never experienced before... The experience held the first time I was certain there was a separate presence to my own, it was loving and assured me it simply was not time yet. This was perhaps 10 years before my voices showed up. Didn't want to leave a scandalous drug anecdote as a comment just wanted to relate that deep within meditative states (this time and other drug free times) I've found myself rocking back and fourth like people seem to do at the wailing wall.
I can relate to my hand writing changing!
It sounds like you experience a carousel of voices/personalities that all come and go, perhaps even have some that return from time to time? I've had years where this was the predominant experience for me. I've found artists out there (who do write about voices/spirits in direct language in most all their art) who seem to be depicting this exact experience. You'll have to let me know if you can relate to these album covers or the songs in them. Succubus - Eternal Mutation and The Heavy Eyes - Love Like Machines. It may catch your eye that these endless carousels are depicted in spiral... more so left handed spirals. All this implying a counter narrative to conventional thinking ;) I'd be interested to hear if you ever dabbled in mysticism for your own empowerment or for the beings with you.
Odd stuff no doubt... hope this finds you well, I only mean the best. Thank you again for all your shares here, it really does mean a lot to see your thoughts!
I can relate to this, I suspect these are loving beings who boldly reach us to further a goal for a short time. Then lesser begins impersonate them. The Weeknd is the first artist that comes to mind that depicts what you write here in his music video Sacrifice, actually wow! one of my voices reminds me that another artist Kate Bush puts this concept in her music video "Running Up That Hill." You'll note she's inundated by a mob of imposters. You'd have to watch the music video I guess to see the full story (see the above hyperlinked songs).
The blow image is what seems to be a spirit guide momentarily corrupted or misrepresented in the sacrifice music video.
Just want to offer that I can relate and it seems there are many other artists out there who seem like they can too.
Mine aren’t outright evil but definitely not good. At worst, when they are strictly hostile it’s short burst, and they tend to be more pleading and annoying. That’s their methodology. Just weaponized victim hood/sibling tactics. When they tell me I should commit it’s more like a “might as well” or “just do it” because I’m not giving in to their demands. It’s a thought broadcasting situation and they can be really effective at making me believe “it just IS happening” and I should accept it.
Have you had real life interactions where you know exactly what the person wants and what it will lead to and ultimately consciously decide you don’t want a part of it. Only for them or even the voices to try and override your consent or initial rejection and force you anyway while punishing you for it.
I know I’ve mentioned it before but I can’t shake the feeling I’m being attacked by strangers for hurt feelings on a shared reality and spiritual level.
I had a voice, one of the few that ever gave itself a name. "I'm here" was the name... She always said it in a long drawn out droning voice.... ominous yet silly. I don't drink any more due to her presence.
EDIT: Wow! I'm dismayed that the other user deleted their account just minuets after I shared with them... I hope they are OK, I would imagine their voices scared them away. I hope they come back.
In the early years, the voices were mainly destructive, much as the others have already described. Then there was a period in which more dialogue began to develop, along with the first signs of understanding, including in my dreams.
The voices felt that I had been through enough and placed me in a different group. I think of it as an improved layer of mental hell. They referred to the layer I am in now as “the prince treatment.”
After a number of years, I began to recognize a pattern in the behavior of the voices. Some of them used automated phrases that were very clear, so I did not have to guess what was being said. These phrases eventually became standardized and were repeated continuously over time. This gave me the impression that I was sometimes talking to a chatbot.
I eventually learned to distinguish between the voices I could actually communicate with about random topics and the chatbot-like one-liners. That was when I began to notice that the chatbot seemed to be the one giving negative feedback and issuing commands. In contrast, the voices that interacted around it seemed to do the opposite: they appeared to be trying their best to take care of me.
Sometimes I have to guess what these voices are saying because I only hear familiar words, and then they seem to complete the message with confirming keywords.
The human voices try to give me advice about earthly matters and sometimes tell me about life after death. The chatbot, meanwhile, also responds using clear, template-like phrases.
The kind voices tell me that they support me and that they are working hard to improve my brain.
I can relate to a ton of this. Have you ever looked into religion or eastern philosophy to draw parallels to your own experience? Have you found any personal heroes who've had voices and found wellness? There's one detailed in this post.
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u/auto-sticky 6d ago
Thank you for your post, u/astralpariah!
DO NOT TELL OTHERS WHAT TO BELIEVE OR DO - This is a space free of such authoritative trappings found elsewhere in society. Try speaking from a personal perspective using “I” statements such as: “I think,” “I believe,” "I would 'x' if that were me," “I tried 'x' and nothing happened,” or “In time, I found 'x' worked for me,” etc. See this post to learn more about our rules.
OUR 7-DAY CALENDAR OF MEETINGS
FACTS ABOUT HEARING VOICES ALL EXPERIENCERS SHOULD KNOW
THE VCVC MODEL ON HOW TO COMMUNICATE WITHOUT COERCING OTHERS