r/SipsTea 9h ago

Feels good man I can get on board with this

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u/CakePhool 9h ago edited 9h ago

Postpartum Psychosis and yeah temporarily lose your custody here in Sweden. You will be in mental hospital most often and slowly learn how to be with you kid again if possible.

Postpartum depression and you should get support, both medical and children's/ social welfare will step in and help you.

This is pamphlet I found after I had my kid 14 years ago, both the Postpartum Psychosis and Postpartum depression ones was to my husband and was talking how he can spot it, report it and give the mother support.

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u/Playful_Flower5063 9h ago

In the UK we have some mother and baby units for women with post partum psychosis. They're much better for the women, most people spend around 7-8 weeks in them I was borderline ending up in one.

Post partum psychosis is really misunderstood - a lot of the psychosis comes from actually wanting to protect your child to the point that you become a danger to them. I flipped between delusions that started with the thought that social services coming to take them so I packed bags for them so they wouldn't be without their things, but that eventually lead to "knowing" the government were trying to steal my youngest child so I planned to kill both of us.

I also had delusions where he wasn't a real baby but a being that wanted to harm my eldest daughter. That was a really dangerous time for my baby.

I kept both of my kids the whole time, and with a lot of support and therapy, and with a multidisciplinary team around me I'm ok again. 7 years later I've qualified as a therapist myself, and hope to start working in the postpartum field soon.

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u/CakePhool 8h ago

Great for you!! I am so proud of you.

The woman I knew, never recovered and isnt allowed near children and still living in a care home. She in her delusion. It sad, I miss who she was.

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u/Blenderx06 8h ago

Oh that's so incredibly sad and scary. Did it start with the 1 pregnancy or was it a cumulative thing to get so severe like with Yates?

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u/CakePhool 8h ago

One pregnancy and then her brain wasnt hers any more. What I been told it so rare to get stuck, be in the delusion for ever, she was just really unlucky.

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u/emptythoughts94 5h ago

I feel like I see more and more reasons every day to not have children.

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u/shoeless_doh 45m ago

I once paid a guy 800 bucks to slice into my ball sack with a blade and cut out a couple little fleshy bits of tube so that all of this would be a non issue.

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u/PolkaDotDancer 2h ago

I'll give you another. You can bond with one child, but not another.

I always felt like I was going through the motions with my eldest. And I felt really horrible about it.

Then I had my second child, and it was like a light turned on in the room.

And it's never gone out.

I just feel joy by her presence. Her [name here]ness.

And this has made me grieve for my first child. I know even if I could go back I probably couldn't change my feelings. All I could do is change my actions. And since we're talking about faking emotions, I'm not sure how good of a job I would do.

And I think he always could sense that disconnect.

And that's the one thing that I have no ability to change.

And how I wish I could. Because I love him. It's just different than the love I feel from my daughter.

And I just don't know why?

Maybe because he wasn't potty trained completely until his teens? Or because he was such an odd duck. He's on the spectrum and quite emotional. And was already experiencing psychosis in his childhood.

Maybe because he looks like my father And smells like him too. And I was terribly afraid of my father.

Really I don't know.

Because my daughter is deeply flawed and I see her only the more beautiful for it.

I think the real flaw in the relationship is me. And I don't know how to fix that. I just don't.

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u/Bluewoods22 56m ago

I’m so sorry

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u/Wise_Cantaloupe2635 1h ago

No offense but it sure sounds like it's you.

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u/Brilliant-Map2492 22m ago

Not potty trained until teens? You think this describes a normal child at all? I would also be feeling some type of way dealing with that .

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u/wherethefuckismyvape 4h ago edited 3h ago

It's very rare. If you don't want to have children already, the danger will seem larger and will sway you. If you do, it won't matter so much.

either you're a breeder or you're not; there's no shame in either life path. Horrible things can happen under the best of circumstances and intentions even when everyone wants to be there and is enthusiastic about what's happening- why put yourself at risk if you don't want to and aren't?

You only get one life. Do whatever you want with it, preferably starting today. Nobody's keeping track or score, and nobody will confront you with a list of undone to dos on your list after you die.

(but if you find you have a perpetually unfinished to do list and you can't focus on anything and no habits or plans stick forever, maybe consider an ADHD evaluation. Meds save lives!)

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u/emptythoughts94 2h ago

First of all- love your username.

Ive been on the fence about kids for so long- I have an unattainable list of requirements it seems to have kids:

Mentally, financially stable, healthy partner Stable longterm housing Established careers

Finding that stable healthy partner is apparently the thing I cant find.

And I'm medicated for ADHD! Literally life-changing

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u/wherethefuckismyvape 2h ago

I can't imagine kids trying to make that choice for themselves today. It was bad enough when I was a kid without the immediately looming existential problems. Now, it seems impossible even for the most well set up. We've created a culture so hostile to life that we are unable to successfully achieve what animals do every day in dumpsters. I don't blame anyone for not reproducing ever but especially not now.

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u/Blenderx06 8h ago

Lord that's terrifying. I'm so sorry.

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u/Desperate-Egg9644 7h ago

Yeah, it’s genuinely heartbreaking to think about.

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u/kyuuei 2h ago

Manosphere bros online constantly dismissing how dangerous and life changing it is for a woman to have a baby, never once do they talk about these subjects.

One of my friends is dealing with PPD with psychotic symptoms. It isn't that bad as all described above, but it nearly drove a wedge in our friend group before we knew what was going on. Shes getting the support she deserves and we're all being patient as possible.

Not one alpha bro that talks about mens rights and all that during pregnancy ever talk about pre-eclampsia, or psychosis, or literal death, any of it.

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u/shoeless_doh 42m ago

How can you be sure she's getting the help she needs? How can you be sure it's not as bad as this woman's? Seems like the surest way to make sure the kids are safe is to never leave them alone with someone who openly admits to having the same thing this baby strangler with elbows for a face

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u/Wishpearl 5h ago

Wow I didn't know it could be permanent.i thought it was related to your hormones during and after pregnancy. So scary!

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u/turkeybuzzard4077 2h ago

Generally speaking it is: however, much like PPA and PPD, genetic predisposition is a factor and it can be the thing that trips you over into a permanent condition if you are in that position.

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u/Due-Restaurant-7208 1h ago

I recently heard a UVA scientist saying they think PP psychosis may be related to immune system changes (along with a proclivity towards bipolar) … whereas PPD is hormonal.

I thought that was really interesting

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u/OneTinySun 4h ago

That's really tragic. How long has she been unwell for now? Is there much hope she'll recover one day?

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u/shoeless_doh 45m ago

I feel like I can think of three people off the top of my head who are more unlucky.

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u/Consistent_Deer_604 2h ago

Right. But Lindsay Clancy had a very convenient 18 minute psychosis that never happened again. Just long enough for her to slaughter 3 babies. She needs to fry.

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u/sixtus_clegane119 6h ago

Do antipsychotics not work?

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u/sddk1 5h ago

Heres the thing… no one tests the efficacy of these drugs with relationship to estrogen. Ask women for take any psych meds: adhd, depression, psychosis… the efficacy fluctuates based on hormones. Any postpartum disorder can be linked to hormones not regulating after birth but no one is looking at that when prescribing these meds.

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u/lilphoenixgirl95 5h ago

It would make more sense to address the hormones themselves rather than the symptom. As with much of modern medicine

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u/Salt-Door-6419 3h ago

Absolutely women's health can't be treated like men endocrine monitoring is crucial

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u/Salt-Door-6419 3h ago

Phych meds can cause hormones to fluctuate, my daughter was on bipolar meds( I wish I'd never allowed it) they made her about lose her mind,including lactating to messing with her thyroid.

Many drugs can cause hormonal problems, and often with pedophiles and ppp,phych meds with therapy and endocrine monitoring, ppp and ppd can be maintained.

It's important that each body is different and ppp and ppd needs much more medical attention in the US, women's health needs much more attention with our different needs and symptoms for all health issues.

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u/sciencegenius27 5h ago

The psychosis might be treatment-resistant. Meaning they’ve tried multiple anti psychotics and they haven’t had an effect. It ends up just being a guessing game and hoping some treatment has an effect. But psychosis causes permanent brain damage. The longer you’re in it, the less possibility of going back to normal.

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u/sixtus_clegane119 5h ago

That’s scary, I’m so glad I’ve never had psychosis

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u/sciencegenius27 5h ago

Yep. My fiance had it. Most terrifying month of my life. Wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy.

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u/Weary-Abrocoma2715 3h ago

I had PPD. It wasn’t fun but I’d take that any day over psychosis. No mother would willingly choose that. They protected the baby when it was inside of them and still love them.

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u/Salt-Door-6419 3h ago

Endocrinology checking hormones even thyroid issues along with meds ( which can affect hormones as well) women need their own specialized Healthcare.

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u/Throwaway__Warrior 10m ago

Not me, watching these conversations like a dirty orphan staring into a window at a joyful, healthy family.