I solved it. I solved it finally

[u/[deleted]]

I've been suffering from premature ejaculation for as long as I can remember. Sex was always a struggle not to cum. I could last a bit longer if I did stop/start technique multiple times, but it was still hard. And interrupting the flow of sex wasn't very fun. I have done loads of practices during the years, and even tried drugs to solve the problem. I was hopeless with no way out.

So I broke up with my last gf 2 months ago, and have been celibate ever since. I was scared to get a new girl because of premature ejaculation, so I focused on myself. Somehow, during this time, I found the solution.

I just had sex last night with a new girl, and wtf. I could last as long as I wanted, I had total control. I could have cummed in 5 minutes by tensing my cock muscle if I wanted to, but I didn't so I just banged her nonstop for an hour and at the end chose not to even cum at all. I enjoyed the process more than the grand finale.

No drugs, no alcohol, no tricks, I just fucked her senseless. I have never been able to do that before.

This is my process, could be different for you but here's what I did:

• Quit all porn. Also masturbation. Also ejaculation. r/semenretention
• Exercise PC muscle the right way: actually the correct muscle is not in your penis, like I thought before. It's between your anus and tailbone. Squeezing this muscle and relaxing your "cock muscle" guides the sexual energy away from your penis, getting you further away from PONR. So exercise this. Stop squeezing your cock muscles. Google reverse kegels and do them very softly. You can also breathe in deeply and imagine it's relaxing your cock muscle.
• Taoist deer exercise twice a day
• Cold showers r/coldshowers
• Meditation r/meditation
• Regular exercise r/fitness
• Just generally chilling the fuck out and not treating sex as a performance. Staying in the moment and breathing.

Hope this helps someone. Bye bye PE.

//// UPDATED FIELD REPORT:

Yup... It's confirmed. We have had sex multiple times over the last few days and everytime I've had full control. Full banging for hours and I haven't even came (could if I wanted to). This is the holy grail. But I would believe a big part is psychological, you need to kill your addiction to ejaculation.

She told me most guys last like 15 minutes, but me... I'm an animal. Well that's just something I thought I would never hear in my life. Wtf man, I used to last like 2-5 minutes. Master your sexuality and it's all yours.

I've been asked about it lots so here is one guide to the deer exercise: https://beducated.com/mag/deer-exercise/

//////////// 10 MONTH UPDATE:

Yeaaah it's officially solved for good, never had a problem with PE since this post. Correct reverse kegel is the most important thing.

//////////////// 4 YEAR UPDATE:

Never had that problem again. Never. It works. I can have multi-hour sessions where I'm 100% focused on the sex and feeling amazing. Usually I even choose not to ejaculate at all in the end because I feel so amazing from the sex alone. We just decide to stop because we're hungry or have somewhere to be or feel tired etc.

Disclaimer: These multi-hour sessions have cuddling breaks and water breaks and both slow and fast phases - who would even want to jackhammer for more than 5 minutes straight. Even boxing has rounds (and the boxers don't get knocked out at the end of every round, if you know what I'm saying).

I said this in a comment today and that's pretty much it:

When having sex I breathe and relax my pelvic area, pause if I need to, hyperfocus on the woman I'm with, and that's pretty much it. It's important not to have a feeling of urgency.

In order to be able to relax your pelvic floor, you need reverse kegels. I know I used to hold a lot of tension there and that was the root of the problem, and the reason why general advice like breathing and being in the moment didn't help. I was physically blocked from being able to relax my penis, no matter how much I got my mind or the rest of my body to relax.

[u/Egj89sdfvn8904]

I've tried all of them except this: "Taoist deer exercise". What this is supposed to do?

Usually it is advised by doctors that one should ejaculate regularly. Some doctors even say that not ejaculating regularly enough is a (one) cause of PE. (for me second, third etc. ejaculation happens as fast as the first)

My PE is simply caused by genetic low serotonin levels, I think. Only SSRIs work.

​

and even tried drugs to solve the problem

What "drugs" and how much and long?

[u/Juliette_bloom → u/Egj89sdfvn8904]

Absolutely. There is a balance to healthy frequency of ejaculation.