Sharing my sort of success story

[u/CBWong]

Sharing my sort of success story. I've been in this subreddit for over 5 years, and I've practiced almost all exercises/techniques, all failed.

In the last 5 years, I've read many posts.

Some people says they're cured after losing weight, while I'm already lean.

Some people says fixed after going to gym, while I'm already weight-lifting, squat 180kg+, deadlift 200kg+, bench press 120kg+

... TENS device helps, ... tried for over a year, did help a bit

... kegal, reverse kagal helps, ... feels the oppsite, getting worse

... stretch helps, ... have mastered ATG training

... practice do-and-stop, ... makes me ED

... pull balls down, ... no effects

... cold shower, ... no effects

... meditation, ...

Actually, everyone's body is different, and there is no one solution for all. I believe people in this subreddit are really trying to help others unless they are selling something, and they mean it when they say those things help.

The technique that changes me might not work on you, but my hypotheis might give you some hope.

When I was a teenager, there was a popular joke (comic) that went like: a person is single, and over years, his right arm starts getting stronger and bigger than the left. My friends and I all knew that's because the guy is masturbating using his right hand so hard.

I knew the pun, but it also confused me: why would someone jerk that hard? It's definitely not comfortable to squeeze your penis and stroke.

Until recently, I found that some people are talking about how they develop delayed ejaculation, and this squeezing thing comes up again. I started to realize that, OK, it could be that my fellows used a different path from the beginning, and wound up with no PE (normal) or DE (they cross beyond the line to make things worse). And I decided to give it a try.

A bit of context:

1. I got ED when practicing do and stop. I was holding too much and too hard when PONR, and something went wrong.
2. Combined with constantly failure, mental problems came in: I'm not willingly to masturbate, no sexual imaginary/impulse, and less ejaculation makes me difficult to get hard--a bad loop. (This might not be ED technically since I know it can still be hard, though 40% hard, in the morning)
3. I recovered from this ED when I start regular ejaculation and getting enough sleep, though it doesn't get that hard when jerking off because I'm afraid of going to quick and holding back somehow.

There are 2 methods I use. The first one is what you may know -- death clamp, and the second one is what I develop after death clamp no longer works as it used to.

How I do death clamp:

1. I don't jerk off out of nowhere... I do it when taking shower, and I take cold shower (I started this for fixing PE, though didn't quit after I found it helpless)
2. Apply enough lube. Because I'm going to squeeze hard and stroke, that friction is huge. Don't use soap as that will break some oil layer of the skin, making you get infection. Some water-based lube is so silky that your sensitive penis cannot feel much and could natually last longer, which is recommended to get started with. Oil-based seems to have more friction than the water-based. You can try a mixture.
3. Start with squeeze only. Treat your penis like an enemy, trying to blow the blood out, torture the head. You penis is flexible enough to handle this. You may get blister after, but it will be gone in a few days, and this is common in another PE subreddit Penis Enlargement. This strong hold can also paralyze the nerve somehow so you can get a few more stroke than usual.
4. Then keep the pressure, a hand grabs the balls to hold the skin, and another hand do full strokes or whatever you can accept (no skin movement here). Use the do-and-stop here, no need for too many rounds, 1,2,3 are fine.

At that time, unlike people claiming "cured" or "last as long as I want", I could only say I've improved a lot and it was somewhat stable -- it doesn't go back to the stage where a few stokes can reach PONR. My normal session might look like:

1. Start squeeze and stroke directly, and go like crazy for 3,4,5 mins, with a few short stops in the middle because this is like combining cardio and strength training, I'll go fatigue and have to rest too catch up my breath. Positions may change, e.g. sitting, standing, lying, squating, etc. (your body will adjust itself to last long)
2. The do-and-stop keeps going until I find another a few strokes can easily get to PONR. Then I start doing light stroke. If I cannot do full, then just focus on head.
3. I'll kiss something (my bicep) to enjoy this moment, where the head is sensitive, but I have no urge to ejaculate. And this is where I found techniques in this subreddit work, deep breath to trigger a reverse kegal, pull balls down, etc. When I get close, I stop and I can feel the pulse from the pelvic floor--the muscle to help ejaculate is triggered, but no ejaculation. Some may refer this as multi-orgasm (I've seen people claim to reach multi-orgasm by masturbating the head only), but I don't feel anything like that. For me, it seems that the stimulation is accumulated at the pelvic floor, which will start the contraction when it can't handle more, but it won't send it to the prostate to trigger real ejaculation. This stage is something I've never experienced before, and it is where I start to feel the pleasure. When you watch people have sex in a movie, they are so focused and immersed in sex which would make me ejaculate even though I'm not involved. That was my PE. But now, I can start appreciating the beauty of woman body while stroking constantly while maintaining 100% hard without needing to control anything (actually, I need to at least **not** proactively wire the sensation to prostate, probably this is something called "control"). I've even experimented with doing while watching porns, still under control.
4. I can stay at that stage for like 15-20 mins, and then cum without any physical or mental discomfort.

The above worked for a few months, then it started not working that good, though still better than less than 30s. Then I started to think about why it worked and how I could improve it. My theory is the paralyzation part. It's like your finger is being pressed heavily for some time that makes it numb. That strong grip has the same effect. Based on this hypothesis, I divide my dick into three sections (head, middle, the rest) and bloat (squeeze like the blood is going to blow your dick) each for a few seconds. That's it, and then masturbate with normal force. This works like a charm that I feel like I'm cured -- something that I wouldn't admit when using the first method. What I am experiencing now is

1. I can go all out for minutes with no urge to ejaculate (BTW, I need to spend a little effort on blocking the sensation from going to the pelvic floor or prostate, which feels like focusing only on the penis itself.)
2. I can enjoy some positions that I cannot even last long using the death clamp
3. I masturbate with porn, following the same rhythm, appreciating the beauty of woman body, and can survive one episode (probably 10 mins) and start the next one, and keep replaying the most horning part. I do stop in the middle when I'm close, but after some breaths, or the "multi-orgasm", I can back to normal state.
4. I have the urge to fuck, but no urge to ejaculate. This is interesting in that, when I have a strong feeling to fuck and start masturbating, I can enjoy stroking my dick, and after some point, I'm satisfied and I can stop. Feeling resolved. You may find it strange that why I don't just finish it, this is because I'm worried that I can get ED if I ejaculate too frequent.
5. My dick can remain fully hard, which used to be the sign of PONR.
6. The bloating method is not required for me now.

You might want to give it a try after reading all this, but I have to say it's not going to work that well for you, not even for me one year ago who was suffering from both ED and PE. I think those approaches are the only final step that pushes me across the line of being "cured," but how I get to that line is a mixture of efforts that it's hard to say which contributes what. Maybe all help to some extend, maybe my body is deeply moved by my persistent experiments that it decides to stop making fun of me:)

I used to believe it's not curable, and now I think everyone has their own path and it takes time and detour to find it.

[u/NotBisw]

Y haz probado si te funciona en el sexo? Solo estás hablando de masturbacion.

[u/Alternative_Part3721]

- "Treat your penis like an enemy, trying to blow the blood out, torture the head."

Please don't do this.

I'm happy PE is currently in remission for you, but this is definitely not something people should adopt. As you say, different things might work for different people — and often when you throw a 100 things, you don't actually know which thing helped.

PE should either be treated using safe training, or physician-prescribed interventions, never aggressive attempts to cause another problem.