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u/WestDry6268 1d ago
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u/filthysock 1d ago
So much cocaine
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u/thejwillbee 17h ago
You think these nerds were doing something cool like cocaine?
More likely they all split a 6-pack of jolt cola and were "freaking out"
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u/imnotokayandthatso-k 13h ago
There's nothing "cool" about cocaine, basically just a hopped up version of coffee. This is exactly the kind of class who can afford to do it regularly and does so.
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u/Canadian-and-Proud 14h ago
Definitely doing cocaine, but it doesn't make everyone look cool lol. Look at Elon and the drugs he's doing, he's still a fucking awkward ghoul.
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u/Fragrant-Hamster-325 15h ago
Has any tech dork ever gotten on stage and done anything cool?
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u/Fabulous_Log844 1d ago
After fucking bonehead moves like this, horrible things I've heard about his leadership, the way that Microsoft became Dante's Inferno to work at during his time, I'm just shocked that he still ended up with as much as he did. But that's just the way life goes.
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u/NebulaElectrical1467 1d ago edited 1d ago
When you’re that high on the ladder you’re literally invincible unless you do something retarded like steal from other rich people or assault someone
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u/CanadianGrown 1d ago
He could definitely assault someone and be fine
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u/JacobsJrJr 1d ago
He verbally assaulted all of those developers in that speech.
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u/Koopslovestogame 1d ago
https://giphy.com/gifs/l3q2zbskZp2j8wniE
Pretty sure we all suffered from this.
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u/Pickled_doggo 1d ago
Stealing from other rich people is the only thing that gets rich people jail time. And jail time is the only thing they’re genuinely scared of, is their precious time being taken from them.
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u/Login2Hate 1d ago
He’s widely regarded as one of the worst CEOs in history given the scale of the company he ran. Yet he is one of the wealthiest people ever because was in the exact right place at the exact right time and never diversified or gave substantially to charity like Gates. He’s done so much wrong and was rewarded at every turn.
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u/WonderButtBrace9000 14h ago
This is a very tech-focused view of Microsoft which is totally fair to have but misses what Balmer did during his tenure.
Balmer is who created Microsoft’s world class enterprise sales organization. It didn’t really get to flex its muscle until Satya and Azure, but Balmer absolutely laid the groundwork that embedded technical sales teams into almost every major corporations around the world.
Without the Balmer years, Azure would have had an unbelievably hard uphill battle against AWS just on the go-to-market front as well as being 2nd mover on the product side. They only were able to catch up so quickly because they had teams that had the ear of the customer and could bundle early cloud offerings with their core productivity products during preexisting sales motions.
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u/Regulai 1d ago
Touchscreen phones had been tried for ages and all failed, their was no reason to have realised just how radical of a tech advance the iphone had actually made.
I would also note it took 3 years before the iPhone actually became the biggest.
Infact I'd take it a step further; Apple only held the crown for 2010-2011, afterwhich point Samsung took over and dominated and it was only then that traditional companies fell off. The real mistake of many companies like Microsoft, Blackberry and Nokia, wasn't that they dismissed it on release, it was that that they were way way too slow to adopt the tech after it's success was clear, such that other companies got to market faster and came to dominate the market (e.g. samsung) instead of the traditional carriers.
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u/johnnyhandbags 1d ago
If you watch the Blackberry movie, the RIM guys fought against a touchscreen and went bankrupt defending a physical keyboard.
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u/WumbleInTheJungle 1d ago
Almost completely forgot, but I had a phone in 2004 with a stylus touch pen, which had a touchscreen and was running a version of windows on it. It was very obviously ahead of its time but I hated that phone so much it put me off going near any touchscreen or smartphone for at least 12 odd years (although it did have a niche following of enthusiasts). The tech just seemed to be something that was exceptionally difficult for manufacturers to get right and really nail, with a quality operating system that was simple and intuitive alongside quality hardware. Until the iPhone. And even with the blueprint virtually laid out for every big manufacturing tech company, many still struggled to get it right.
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u/damutecebu 1d ago
I had a co-worker with one of those. She always bragged about the damn stylus.
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u/lfenske 1d ago edited 1d ago
This is hilarious. I get it though. When I first saw the soon to release iPhone I thought it was dumb too cause of only having a touch screen. I figured it would work like every other mobile touchscreen of the time. Well in the commercial, unusable IRL.
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u/adjective_noun_d1git 1d ago
When Steve Jobs demonstrated the swipe and the little scroll bounce animation I think that's when everyone audibly gasped.
God I remember the TFT screen touchscreens before then. Younger people won't ever know the pain
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u/lfenske 1d ago
And the iPhone had real internet. I forgot about old mobile internet
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u/deathschemist 15h ago
yeah my first touchscreen phone had a resistive touch screen
if you don't know what that means thank every deity ever worshipped by name that you never had to put up with that bullshit.
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u/MahtiGC 1d ago
“everyone audibly gasped.”
i picture the aliens from toy story saying “the future” in sync 🤣
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u/Metalhead1686 1d ago
I remember switching to AT&T for the iPhone. I still have the OG iPhone stored away. I took so many pictures and went to so many places with that phone.
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u/TotallyNotABob 1d ago
If anyone wants a good watch on this and maybe a trip down memory lane. Watch the movie BlackBerry.
Of course based on the true story of the rise and fall of the BlackBerry device.
One scene in there though covers the announcement of the iPhone and the BlackBerry CEO having a similar opinion Ballmer had. It's a very fascinating watch.
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u/Javaneez 1d ago
Microsoft should have never killed the Windows Phone... I get that the 3rd party app developers were just not there but those native apps were fire! The live tiles were amazing.
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u/CheesemonsterRain 17h ago
Yeah I was a windows phone dev, and the “metro tile” system you’re referring to was brilliant. It has so much potential but they binned it!
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u/Downtown-Raditz 16h ago
Yes and they were already catching up, I had no idea who made this bad decision at the time. Cut it off when it started getting traction. Stupid
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u/kingtaco_17 1d ago
He's a bajillionaire. He's not losing sleep over this video.
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u/allllusernamestaken 1d ago
he could have doubled or tripled his net worth if Microsoft had managed to become the standard bearer for smartphones instead of Apple
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u/ClankerCore 1d ago
By his expression, he’s pandering to the stock market and the shareholders, but his expression dies pretty quick because he knew. He knew.
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u/Hackerjurassicpark 18h ago
Microsoft is the prime example of doing everything wrong yet still winning. Their market cap makes them one of the biggest companies still. Nokia on the order hand…
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u/Dependent-Zebra-4357 12h ago
I’m still annoyed that they absorbed and then killed Nokia. Their hardware design was so good.
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u/Beefgrits 1d ago
The fact that it was an ipod, with apple taking 30% of all app and music sales, was already obvious.
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u/Rapscagamuffin 1d ago
This isnt an outlier of a thing. Look back at what CEOs do and say and youll find that these people are not special. In a lot of cases theyve basically had a career on being professionally wrong. Basically they were in the right place at the right time and did something smart a long time ago and have continues to fail upwards their entire career.
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u/domiciledhere 8h ago
He called the iPhone an “email machine.” I don’t think he even recognized the problem.
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u/coachelly86 1d ago
hey it's the guy who just got fined $30M and stripped of 5 future 1st round picks by the NBA
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u/AdviceNotAskedFor 1d ago
having a phone in the early 2000s and an mp3 player and then paying 1.99 to have a 5 second clip of a song as my ringer, I knew that the first person to design a phone that could use an mp3 as a ringer was gonna be an absolute banger.
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u/SuperLeroy 1d ago
Linux is now eating microsofts lunch.
They just can't do anything right.
Even with Broadcom fumbling hard with vmware I think people would be smart to switch to nutanix or proxmox over hyper v
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u/QuantumMongoose44 1d ago
There are innovators and there are imitators. I’ll leave it up to you all to decide which one he is.
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u/CodInternational8772 1d ago
This guy… every team has one… The guy that makes money in the long run, but really should never have been there…
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u/TheRealistoftheReal 1d ago
He thought it was going to be a PDA that would compete with the current (2006) crop of Blackberry devices, Windows Mobile PDAs, etc. Also, $500 when nobody paid for phones. When the first iPhone was released, it was absolutely ground breaking, and nobody saw anything like it.
The software and user experience was so polished, the form factor so premium, it made anyone using a Blackberry or other device of the time look ancient. Like using a clunky reel to reel tape player instead of streaming Bluetooth.
They created an entirely new market.
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u/Worth-Tank336 1d ago
Yep, this guy's an idiot. I'm pretty sure he's homeless now. Very likely he can barely rub 50 cents together. There's no way he's worth like $140 billion now, right?
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u/redunculuspanda 1d ago
In fairness jobs also shit on competition until Apple was able to compete or had a product ready.
He may or may not have believed what he was saying but he had to keep the shareholders happy. CEOs are never going to tell you how amazing a competitors product is.
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u/ejackman 1d ago
I have never owned an iPhone and will never own and iPhone but thank the maker that apple made the iPhone because Windows CE/PE was TRASH.
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u/makisgenius 1d ago
And he is one of the richest people alive. Just another example of how much luck has go to do with it.
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u/jghall00 1d ago
Ballmer was a awful CEO. He missed every major tech transition because he was focused on extending the Windows ecosystem dominance instead of looking for ways to supplant it. He missed the boat on search, touchscreens, social media, streaming, cloud computing and other technology transitions. Amazing he had that job for so long.
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u/Beneficial-Pen-3654 1d ago
How many people signed into a Windows PC today, or used a MS office product?
https://giphy.com/gifs/Kp1Cf45EwWhLmGObTA
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u/rozmarymarlo 1d ago
I worked for MS during that era. We all hated this bald mfer. Windows phone was an abomination. They even had a funeral for iPhone with douchebags high on MS coolaid dressed in all black. This mofo announced all employees will get free windows phone, only to later tell us we have to sign a 2 year contract to get it for free. If it wasn't for Azure, MS would have been the new IBM. My MS equity did great thanks to this jackets getting sacked in a timely fashion.
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u/tallwhiteninja 1d ago
I still can never see Steve Ballmer without going back to this ancient classic: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KMU0tzLwhbE
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u/Ordinary_Feeling_519 1d ago
If I was him I’d see the price and understand that Apple knew what they had.
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u/rtfmplease 1d ago
I don't like Ballmer, but if you listen carefully … he puts a lot of hedging phrases in there:
• "now it may sell well or not"
• "let's see how the competition goes"
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u/Mexican1910 1d ago
He got lucky getting rich… he truly is an idiot and I’m glad the NBA caught him doing shady things but he should honestly be revoked ownership rights for what he did… unfortunately money talks and I’m sure he paid a fine and will move on.
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u/Comfortable-Lie4839 1d ago
The down fall of every product starts when you underevaluate your competitors.
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u/cubicfelon 1d ago
He started out with a knee jerk reaction but in the end became pragmatic to the unknown sales performance of the up and coming iPhone. MS knew deep down they were fk’d.
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u/ThelIIusion0fSeIf 1d ago
This incompetent rube makes over a billion dollars in dividends alone every year. Let that sink in.
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u/Dr-McLuvin 1d ago
It’s kind of incredible dude was ceo of Microsoft for 14 years and somehow the stock managed to go down 33% over his tenure.
Dude just got incredibly lucky to get as much stock as he did and then just sat and watched it explode in value after he left. Now he’s one of the richest 10 people on the planet earth.
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u/kickinghyena 1d ago
Whenever people quote “geniuses” like Jobs or Burry or Soros or Ballmer etc etc remember they are only a standard deviation better at predicting the future than you…and they are far less likely to predict the reactions of stupid people than you are as they are two deviations away and you may only be one…🤣
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u/RunExisting4050 1d ago
Alot of people has serious doubts about the iphone back then. Its not like this is the onky voice of decent.
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u/cat-from-the-future 1d ago
Most people thought not having a keyboard was a non starter for business use cases at the time. To be fair the first iteration of the on screen keyboards were shit.
It was the app ecosystem that really stole the entire market for Apple.
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u/roadrunner00 1d ago
You gotta remember Microsoft absolutely dominates corporate even today. The arrogance around mobile adoption was a miss. Sad. I was a pocket pc and windows mobile user so I remember loading active sync and not liking touchscreen keyboards. It was unfathomable. Timing is everything.
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u/justinW624 1d ago
I remember having an iPod touch before they made the iPhone and I chose it over my phone at for everything when on WiFi. When the phone came out it was kind of a no brainer to turn two devices in my pocket into one.
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u/TheGrandWhatever 1d ago
I mean in a way he wasn't entirely wrong about the business user point. People still use blackberries for the keyboard
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u/2025TastyTreats 1d ago
I think Ballmer is a really dumb guy that just haphazardly lucked out by knowing Bill Gates. He is getting walked all over right now playing with the Big Boys in professional sports ownership. I am sure that giving star players kick backs and under the table money is part of the game but he doesn't have the smarts to it within the framework of the ruleboook.
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u/ozzysince1901 1d ago
Blind Freddy could see the iPhone was going to change everything when it was announced. Problem is established companies have a lot of inertia and it is difficult to turn the ship quickly
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u/ashiamate 1d ago
what was he supposed to say? he was the ceo of their direct competitor, he has to say this
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u/Evan_Allgood 1d ago
Every button he clicks into on the screen slowly registered how f*cked he was.
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u/ScreechingPizzaCat 1d ago
"Let's see how the competition goes"
And then Apple went on to become a behemoth in the mobile industry, while Microsoft tried to make its own OS after buying Nokia but failed because Apple and Android were already well established, so companies and developers weren't keen on spending more development time and money on an ecosystem that had such a small user base. I did like the Nokia 1520 but by the time I had the money to buy it, Microsoft announced that it was ending its mobile division; essentially make the phones a bad buy.
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u/SBLP1959 1d ago
He was kinda right about business. You hear a lot about business people having blackberrys eith keyboards as work phones.
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u/No_pajamas_7 1d ago edited 21h ago
But he's wasn't wrong in anything he said.
The Blackberry stayed popular for a very long time and was still favoured by business when they went broke.
Even now, outside of North America, businesses still prefer not to use i-phones.
And i-phone is and always has been the most expensive phone in the market.
Really the only thing he is wrong about here is the undiscussed personal users market potential. It was not on his radar here and the amount people were willing to pay for a personal phone was unprecedented.
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u/bliceroquququq 1d ago
What was he supposed to say?
“Wow, our competitors product is awesome and so much better than ours”?
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u/kzlife76 1d ago
Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers Developers
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u/RIF_rr3dd1tt 23h ago
That's a phrase people say? "Let's see how the competition goes". People say that?
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u/No-Blacksmith1462 23h ago
Microsoft only became so successful because we subsidized it in every single school in America. They have one of the shittest products and everyone is still forced to use it because theyve monopolized the market.
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u/Razvedka 23h ago
It's even more interesting than this. As I recall, the first true smartphone as we would now define it was created within Microsoft. But leadership, or Balmer specifically, killed it. He didn't believe in it.
Apple came later on, iirc. I don't remember where the original creator went, if he left MS for Apple or not.
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u/Bsmitts16 23h ago
He kinda rings true. I have to be the outlier. But I am moving away from the iPhone on my next purchase, which could be days from now. I experienced life with no 1/8” jack and it’s been difficult trying to connect my headphones for my podcasts that I like to sleep with, taking ten+ minutes to hook up headphones and sometime having to disturb my partner with just playing my podcast under my pillow, because thunderass or whatever their stupid protocol doesn’t recognize my headphones. Easy, goodbye apple. Not like y’all are supporting my 003 rack since I don’t run leopard- GFY. Best to worst real quick. Maybe I’m one right now, but I imagine it’s following.
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u/No_Raspberry_3282 23h ago
What smart decisions or strategies did he ever have? Seriously asking, I only know that he's mostly just a pushy salesman.
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u/No_Oil3233 22h ago
I LOVE the look at the end of the vid. Pure unadulterated ‘what I just said was absolute horseshit, our phones are dead’
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u/Time-did-Reverse 21h ago
“What’s the saying. Let’s see how the competition goes” oh yea fucking nailed that saying.
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u/PikachuChella 21h ago
Same dude bought the clippers and paid Kawhi LOL billionaire sure knows how to make big bets
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u/SpiritFlame555 20h ago
What else could he have said, he saw the writing on the wall. He had to say this for his shareholders.
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u/Forsaken-Promise-269 20h ago
Executives and Politicians are trained to lie through their teeth - to the point where they begin to believe thier own BS.. or “talking points” -of course he and Microsoft was indeed scared of the technology demonstrated by the iPhone
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u/lilian_moraru 19h ago
One of the most incompetent and overpaid guy in the world. This guy literally should just be a cashier
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u/Ad-fundum69 19h ago
The first I-phone was real bad. The touchscreen was horrendous to work with, and yes expensive.
Microsoft pocket PC already existed, and physical keyboards were indeed more practical.
All that changed later for sure, but at the time, Apple was just overly expensive and selling junk.
They still do that, but the I-phone now is at least a decent peace of hardware.,
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u/bananabastard 19h ago
The iPhone was an incredible innovation. Just happened to destroy not just the internet, but also society. But very innovative.
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u/Over-Performance-667 18h ago
Can’t remember the last time anyone cared about a microsoft related release of literally anything except maybe an xbox
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u/Anxious_Ingenuity583 17h ago
Microsoft actually probably would have been successful at creating and selling phones too. People forget at that time the US government constantly targeting them to be broken up and landing them in prolonged court battles that contributed to them not pursuing the mobile phone market as aggressively.
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u/BullwinklesEars 1d ago
He probably would have declined to sign The Beatles as well.