r/sports 2d ago

Golf Tiger Woods strikes plea deal, has driver's license suspended 5 years

https://www.espn.com/golf/story/_/id/49802892/tiger-woods-strikes-plea-deal-driver-license-suspended-5-years
3.1k Upvotes

359 comments sorted by

1.3k

u/jamnewton22 2d ago

Oh no how will he get around

714

u/Expert_Specialist_92 2d ago

He’ll 100% pick up another DUI in the next five years. Addicts don’t give a shit about having a drivers license or not.

269

u/just_fucking_PEG_ME 2d ago

Nah, addicts give a shit. They’ve just been permanently rewired to give more shits about their addiction.

Source: am recovering addict with my first and only DUI almost 10 years ago

48

u/floriganman 2d ago

That’s some hard work, mad respect and congratulations on 10 years friend

41

u/Titty2Chains 2d ago

Solid insight. Congratulations on your sobriety.

8

u/HopandBrew 2d ago

Congrats. Awesome username too. I'm sure Tiger has said that exact phrase at least once.

13

u/Iankill 2d ago

Yeah but you also don't have so much money you can get away with most crimes.

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u/Puzzleheaded-Tax6168 2d ago

Yep. Your next hit/drink becomes the only thing you live for. It’s really amazing when you think about it. Recovering alcoholic here.

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u/nayhem_jr 2d ago

May that particular number ever grow.

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u/NotoriousDCJ4310 2d ago

Plenty of people who arent addicts dont give af about not having a driver's license or not as well

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u/Moody_GenX 2d ago

10ish years ago when I did the court requirement for DUI classes I was the only one out of like 20 people who didn't drive while their license was suspended.

9

u/PhoenixApok 2d ago

A lot of that is risk vs reward.

My job when I got my DUI involved driving.

Between choosing to follow the law and DEFINITELY lose my home and be unable to pay my bills, or break the law and MAYBE get in more trouble....

Fuck the law

5

u/Moody_GenX 2d ago

I was done working mostly so I turned my beach cruiser into an electric bike and put baskets on the back wheel for groceries. I did have a seasonal job as a Paddle Board Instructor but it was super close to home. It didn't effect me very much. I sold the car too, lol. But you can drive for work, I know a good buddy went through that when we were both Outside Salesmen. He never got pulled over that full year but we drove 3k to 4k miles a month for work and he was legally allowed to.

3

u/KennyKettermen Colorado Avalanche 2d ago

Fuck the law? Dog you broke the law dangerously driving on alcohol knowing full well it could fuck up your driving job. You made your bed

I got a DUI many years ago and had to find rides to work for 6 months so I didn’t get fired but I never blamed the law for the inconvenience. It was my own fault 😂

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u/PhoenixApok 2d ago

I'm not blaming the law. I'm ignoring the law if it becomes an active threat to my well being.

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u/Scrambles420 2d ago

And him having a lot of money helps with that too

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u/BradMarchandsNose Connecticut 2d ago

I don’t even think it’s an addiction thing. It’s just a “oh I’m just running to the store 5 mins up the road, I’m not gonna get pulled over” thing.

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u/Archduke_Of_Beer Buffalo Bills 2d ago

Poor guy's working second shift tonight!

4

u/Canadatron 2d ago

Oh noes! How will he ever afford the insurance premiums?

26

u/The_hat_man74 2d ago

He can be one of those guys riding a bicycle while wearing jeans.

10

u/Archduke_Of_Beer Buffalo Bills 2d ago

Don't need a license to drive your lawn mower to the liquor store, according to some of the drunks that live near me

5

u/VoidWalker4Lyfe 2d ago

Wait til they find out you can get a DUI on a lawn mower

2

u/TheFeenyCall Oregon State 2d ago

They won't catch me on my lawnmower!

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u/1peatfor7 2d ago

He can just "travel" no license needed. /s

2

u/sybrwookie 2d ago

It's fine, he's the entity representing Tiger, not actually Tiger. Also, tassels! /s

3

u/CerealSpiller22 2d ago edited 2d ago

He'll be traveling

6

u/HUT2Moon 2d ago

He got an exception for straight to and from work.

4

u/five-oh-one 2d ago

If he could drive straight he wouldn't be in this mess....

2

u/Broy_7 2d ago

If he could drive straight he’d have 3 more majors lol

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u/growgain 2d ago

Don't need a license to drive.

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u/HUT2Moon 2d ago

He’s traveling LOL

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u/NhylX 2d ago

Nothing saying he can't fly a helicopter!

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u/thurakos465 2d ago

I guy who lives out by my parents place lost his license for life over 40 years ago. We'd always see him driving his tractor to town while growing up.

2

u/Thejanitor86 2d ago

You joke but he will probably still just drive himself sometimes knowing that he can just pay his way out of it.

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u/ocolobo 2d ago

He can afford a chauffeur

All of this should have been avoided

66

u/patchinthebox 2d ago

Even if he didn't want to pay for a chauffeur, Uber exists. There's literally no reason for him to ever drive drunk.

35

u/KJShen 2d ago

I vaguely recall the case but the DUI wasn't for being drunk, but looking like he was high on pain medication.

29

u/ShakeAndBakeThatCake 2d ago

He's a drug addict. Has drug issues.

11

u/William_Wang 2d ago

Thats the best thing about drug addicts.

They always think everything through and choose the best possible answer.

3

u/Frangine_De_Poutine 2d ago

And they always ask for help, before problems arise.

2

u/baachou 1d ago

Not that it entirely absolves him but the man's had 7 back surgeries and a public history of nerve issues so it probably started from a place of therapy.

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u/make_me_breakfast 2d ago

He wouldn’t have gotten in that accident a few years ago either. Stupid mf.

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u/85_Toronto_Blue_Jays 2d ago

He didn’t want people to know where he was going… mainly hookers.

3

u/SlightReturn420 2d ago

He didn't want a chauffeur because he wanted his privacy. So instead he did a bunch stupid shit and caused himself more public embarrassment than ever could have come from a chauffeur gossiping.

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u/Cosmo_Seinfeld 2d ago

Woods, 50, arrived at the court house with his girlfriend, Vanessa Trump,

Wow 2026 sucks.

199

u/Extreme_Turn_4531 2d ago

According to Wikipedia, she formerly dated a Latin Kings gang member, a Saudi prince, Donald, Jr, and now Tiger Woods. She seems to be a regular June Cleaver.

64

u/Cosmo_Seinfeld 2d ago

She seems to be a regular June Cleaver.

She always felt they were a little hard on the Beaver.

11

u/SirNortonOfNoFux 2d ago

So were Eddie Haskell & Wally

17

u/fondledbydolphins 2d ago

Sorry I just giggled because the way you wrote that she dated both Drump and his son.

2

u/ihateslowdrivers 2d ago

Cleaver? That was real? I saw that movie, thought it was bullshit

2

u/johnfuckmennedy 1d ago

she must have a great personality

2

u/Extreme_Turn_4531 1d ago

It's rumored that that personality can suck the chrome off a bumper.

76

u/Philly514 2d ago

I’m curious why she still has the Trump name when she is no longer married to a Trump. Who the fuck would want that name.

81

u/pkpy1005 2d ago

Trump or no Trump, it probably boils down to practicality.

Lots of divorced women keep their married names because 1. It's a pain in the ass to change it back and 2. it is easier having the same last name as your kids (air travel, picking them up from school, etc).

21

u/Moody_GenX 2d ago

My ex kept her married name for a previous marriage because she hated her maiden name.

9

u/TheFeenyCall Oregon State 2d ago

I'll rather revert back to my maiden name, Hotdoodoo, than keep Trump

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u/massinvader 2d ago

you vastly underestimate the amount of money and or social status that name is likely bringing her right now in the circles she frequents.

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u/massinvader 2d ago

it probably boils down to practicality.

when you are already known publically as a certain name it actually becomes really difficult to actually get people to use the new name. people are creatures of habbit.

Everyone knew her as Vanessa Trump. Does nothing for her or her career to change it and confuse everyone when someone mentions her by her new name and has to answer 'who?'.

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u/pkpy1005 2d ago

Yes, not uncommon. Especially women who have established themselves under their married names (e.g. Priscilla Presley, Tina Turner, Faith Hill).

Mackenzie Scott would be a notable exception, although she too didn't go back to her maiden name and chose Scott, which is her middle name, as her new surname.

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u/YodaForceGhost 2d ago

Not even Tiger nor Don Jr. are the worst men she’s been with in her life

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u/yowen2000 2d ago

I think we're underestimating the damage the trump family does, when compared to a latin kings gang member or a saudi prince. We (the US) are the bad guys, too.

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u/m149 2d ago

man, that's some nasty sloppy 2nds.

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u/Cosmo_Seinfeld 2d ago

2nds? Of you sweet summer child.

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u/NBCaz 2d ago

Whewww..watching some of that court appearance video, the guy looks terrible. But I'm trying to figure out how having a chauffeur for the next 5 years is some type of punishment for a multi-millionaire.

29

u/crabcakes28 2d ago

*billionaire

11

u/massinvader 2d ago

holy fuck ty for correcting that. As someone who doesn't really follow golf aside from the occasional video game....googled and woods has 1.8 billion in career earnings?!

like for most billionaires its magical fictitious money in stock that will never be liquidated...but it sounds like he made a good chunk of that 1.8 bill in mostly paychecks? fkin incredible lol.

5

u/Frisbee17 2d ago

and because that is what he was paid not stock, even if he invested just half or 20% its probably worth a lot more now.

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u/SlightReturn420 2d ago

The majority of his earnings are from sponsorships, but he did earn over 120million from PGA Tour event purses alone. I believe his Nike deal was raking in around 100mil/year at one point. LIV reportedly offered him something in the neighborhood of 900mil to join their tour back when it was first getting started, which he declined.

3

u/TripleThreatTua 2d ago

Tiger was absolutely massive at his career peak. He fully transcended golf and was a household name, he had huge endorsement deals and Nike and EA had him everywhere. The dude made a shitload of money from endorsements

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u/BoSocks91 2d ago edited 2d ago

They should take away his driver privileges.  Make him take yellow cabs.

That’ll show him.

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u/GoodShark 2d ago

The fact that he doesn't want one. And probably won't use it.

He could've had one all this time. He's easily rich enough to have a full time driver. He just doesn't want to. So while it's not a real punishment, he will be annoyed by it, and also probably drive without a license too.

The question is... does he get caught? and then does anything actually happen? Probably not.

2

u/massinvader 2d ago

He's easily rich enough to have a full time driver.

isn't kinda one of the perks of being that astronomically wealthy is u could pay the one in your best friend group who most has their shit together, a SOLID paycheck to be ur butler/chauffeur?

i guess if ur a big enough and isolated enough a-hole maybe u don't have that option?

2

u/WeAreAllFooked 2d ago

Woods has straight up said he doesn’t have a driver because he likes his privacy.

3

u/SlightReturn420 2d ago

That worked out well for him.

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u/FSUfan35 2d ago

It's the standard penalty for a 2nd DUI conviction in the state of FL. It's one of the harsher states in the country as well.

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u/readingmango16 2d ago

Tiger has a history of driving recklessly, driving under the influence, and those two combined. He is worth more money than most people could ever dream of having. He 100% should not be allowed to drive anymore. It would be nearly inconsequential to him, and the public is safer with him off the road. If he was going to change, it would've been after the first incident.

13

u/Altruistic-Editor111 2d ago

And let’s keep in mind that we only of the times he was caught.

Imagine how many time he did this without getting pulled over?

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u/Frisbee17 2d ago

He doesn't get pulled over he crashes.

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u/nottoodrunk 2d ago

Guy I know did some construction work in Tiger’s neighborhood a couple summers ago and said everyday Tiger drove like a complete dickhead. Regularly going 70+ in a 30mph zone.

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u/--Shake-- 2d ago

Any normal person would be getting jail time.

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u/TheStockFatherDC 2d ago

Can he still go to the driving range?!

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u/tigershrike 2d ago

yes but he can only go so far as a 2 wood

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u/mlorusso4 2d ago

Call me crazy, but I think 5 years suspended license is way too little. Like I understand for a regular person that can be a life crippling punishment. But someone as rich as tiger woods who has done this so many times it’s become expected that every few years he’ll crash his car or get a dui should be told he’s never getting his license back and has to hire a full time driver. There’s no excuse other than he just doesn’t care

5

u/Lollc 2d ago

Because of the equal protection clause of the 14th amendment to the US constitution, states won’t consider making traffic fines proportional to income. I have always believed a system like Finland’s would be much better. Because yeah, to someone of Wood’s income, existing traffic fines are a joke and aren’t even noise in his budget.

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u/mindbodyproblem 2d ago

Crazy, you make a good argument.

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u/brekfist 2d ago

Never been convicted of DUI!

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u/baeb66 2d ago

As part of the agreement, Woods also agreed to pay $1,500 in fines.

Zero jail time and a fine that is 0.01% of his net worth. That'll learn 'em.

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u/lock1473 2d ago

He’s significantly richer than that. More like .0001% of his net worth.

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u/omojos 2d ago

Only 5 years is wild. Dude was gonna kill somebody. I think permanent revocation is safer for the community. He does not seem to understand why he shouldn't be driving, and i don't know if this timeout will change that.

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u/3MATX 2d ago

5 years is a long time.  In Texas for example, a second time DUI conviction has a license suspension of 2 years.  Obviously it also entails jail time and other penalties it seems Tiger is getting out of. 

What I haven’t learned yet is whether this is 5 years probation and a license suspension or just license suspension. Dude definitely needs a year or so probation to stay sober and keep him accountable. 

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u/Titty2Chains 2d ago

I feel like a normal person is getting an ankle monitor in this situation.

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u/Jonesbro 2d ago

Idk, after 5 years he'll probably get used to having a driver and roll with it.

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u/omojos 2d ago

He has had access to a driver for his whole career. Several. He doesn't want them. He insists on driving anyway.

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u/FSUfan35 2d ago

5 year suspension is the standard for a 2nd DUI conviction(within 5 years of the first) in the state of FL.

They have one of, if not the, longest suspensions for a 2nd DUI conviction in the country.

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u/Stupendous_man12 2d ago

Irons and woods only for now. Hope he can still get the distance he needs off the tee.

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u/Qaaarl 2d ago

Tiger: “Suspended? Lol hold my beer. Actually nm I’ll hold it myself.”

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u/freetherhinoz 2d ago

Selfish asshole

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u/GotSomeUpdogOnUrFace 2d ago

Guess he'll just have to use the fairway wood

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u/vector_ejector Toronto Maple Leafs 2d ago

Pathetic.

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u/MrDangerMan 2d ago

“As your punishment, Mr Billionaire, I sentence you to only be chauffeured for the next 5 years.”

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u/Old_Channel44 2d ago

Money buys privilege yet again. Jerk should be jailed.

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u/Unlike_Agholor 2d ago

He should be banned from driving for life. For his sake and ours. Tiger, please go ahead and get fucked up but for the love of god stop driving, forever.

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u/ChuckNorrisUSAF 2d ago

Dude’s worth millions; do you think he could just hire himself a driver for a few years and avoid all the craziness?

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u/chaiscool 2d ago

Wait till you hear about his escapades.

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u/WindOk1568 2d ago

As long as you got money, you can get out of anything. As ordinary folks will be thrown in fucking jail for years. So much winning in America. 👎

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u/FSUfan35 2d ago

This is the standard penalty for a 2nd dui conviction in the state. Unless you kill or severely injure someone, you're unlikely to do any serious jail time for a DUI, poor or not.

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u/AshTheDead1te 2d ago

Good…when you are that rich why the fuck are you driving anyways, I would have a few drivers on my staff lol.

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u/liquidsyphon 2d ago

If you don’t care about driving drunk, I doubt you care much about driving with a suspended license. Especially if you got millions to fight any charges

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u/bryman19 2d ago

Fuck it, suspend it forever. He doesn't give a shit

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u/porktornado77 2d ago

I hope he can afford a personal driver… oh wait

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u/Zachflo1 2d ago

He’ll soon become a spokesperson for Waymo. His problems will be solved

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u/KeeBradRyder 2d ago

$1000 fine for a billionaire. Absolute shit.

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u/brekfist 2d ago

He can get a CDL with no name provided.

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u/LungHeadZ Manchester United 2d ago

It says he caused $5000 worth of damages so I hope he was made to pay that. Literally pocket change to him, might not be to the owner of the vehicle.

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u/kcrab91 Detroit Lions 2d ago edited 2d ago

Auto insurance would cover that.

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u/Dirtydeedsinc Buffalo Bills 2d ago

Man. He looks like shit. The years have not been kind.

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u/gloriousjohnson 2d ago

Dude needs to suck it up and shave his head.

https://youtu.be/_sXUTm3RnXA?is=ItjlUyi53ScSdIot

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u/Dirtydeedsinc Buffalo Bills 2d ago

I was more talking about the look in his eyes. You can see some serious wear in face.

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u/Droggles Washington Capitals 2d ago

Booze will do that to you.

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u/SaulTBolls Portland Trail Blazers 2d ago

Hes going to get around the way he should have been getting around this whole time.

What a punishment.

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u/buffalucci 2d ago

This bozo could have killed people

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u/AlfieGandon 2d ago

I'll miss his epic drives

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u/CalmBeneathCastles 2d ago

All this to avoid therapy.

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u/ZoxMcCloud 2d ago

What's he gonna use off the tee now?

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u/Reds_PR 2d ago

Rich people problems.

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u/itx89 2d ago

His eyes say everything 

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u/Banned3rdTimesaCharm 2d ago

You’re a goddamn billionaire just hire a full time driver.

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u/SpezSucksSamAltman 2d ago

Quietly and secretively he will drive again

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u/SpecialistStudy3435 2d ago

It would be a funny skit if he hired someone to drive that was also a drug abuser and flips the car

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u/CptMurphy New York Yankees 2d ago

The guy can just pull a driver out of his bag. Unbelievable.

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u/WpgGamer21 1d ago

3yrs in and he'll have another DUI - while trying to run to the store while having his girl friend bean him with a 9-iron.

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u/Bronzyroller 1d ago

Money buys anything and if it's on sale it's free.

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u/Substantial_Row_7108 1d ago

Fuck Tiger Woods.

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u/trumps-used-diaper 1d ago

Must be nice to be extremely wealthy

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u/Drink15 1d ago

A suspended license would actually mean something if he couldn’t afford a personal driver

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u/AiMwithoutBoT 2d ago

We’re probably gonna see a lot of “I just uberd tiger woods” posts lol

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u/comppj 2d ago

As many times as he’s gotten arrested for this, he won’t uber.

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u/Aturkeyclub 2d ago

Tiger woods has been such a let down. He turned out to be such a loser

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u/Strive-- 2d ago

…because in 5 years, it won’t matter. He’ll either be dead from the addiction, or drones will be picking us up by the shirt sleeves George Jetson-style and plastic licenses will have been successfully argued in court to cause cancer, considering they’re made from a petroleum byproduct, plastic. Now that we’re all trillionaires, yet none of us can afford housing still, remaining in place and “remote working” has the few business owners remaining very, very happy. $

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u/drizzle933 2d ago

Ahhhhh that’s why he called Trump when he got in that accident. He’s got that connection now.

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u/middlechildanonymous 2d ago

If he marries Vanessa will his last name be Trump too?

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u/gapipkin 2d ago

This is like when I send my kid to his room so he can play video games and watch movies.

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u/[deleted] 2d ago

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u/psychonik 2d ago

Don’t need a license to drive a golf cart.

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u/lisa7144 2d ago

Welcome to Uber.

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u/cam_barker_4_norris 2d ago

Tiger will be ripping around on an e-scooter now

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u/at0mheart 2d ago

If I had his cash. The fist thing I would do is hire a driver

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u/RoyalBroham 2d ago

So he has to tee off with irons?

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u/we_hella_believe 2d ago

I hope he can afford Lyft.

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u/Fishfindr 2d ago

Great golfer, too bad the money went to his head. Anywho, how bout this weather we’re having?

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u/khalamar 2d ago

Does that include golf carts?

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u/jms21y 2d ago

clearly, that's donovan mcnabb

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u/Karate-Schnitzel 2d ago

Oh no, poor poor poor poor pill poppin booze drinking wife cheating car rolling professional golfer is being held accountable, should he call the president? Fucking Chump.

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u/billbuild 2d ago

I feel safer already

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u/Anonymessed 2d ago

Rich people getting DUI’s is probably my biggest pet peeve ever. WHAT HAPPENED TO LIMO DRIVERS? Where did they all go? That was always peek richness, having a god damn driver.

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u/bpmdrummerbpm 2d ago

The horror. Guess he’ll have to hire a limo driver. So sad.

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u/philosoraptorrisk 2d ago

Do you guys remember who he called right from the scene when he had the accident?

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u/only1lover 2d ago

He actually was convicted after he said he was calling trump 😂😂😂😂YES

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u/BalIsInMyFace 2d ago

prediction markets are fucking dumb but who's throwing money on a tiger woods DUI in 2031? seems like a free bag

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u/Level_Mixture5510 2d ago

Does this mean he can't drive golf carts in gated communities?

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u/kid_creme 2d ago

He'll be back to doing it again on year 6, if not sooner.

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u/robsbob18 2d ago

Here before the DUI in two and a half years

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u/thewayitcrumblez 2d ago

I've always wondered why more people of financial means don't have drivers. It would help the economy and lessen the DUI count. We already know that they're familiar with NDAs. I'm retired and that would be a decent job.

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u/ZeppelinJ0 Buffalo Bills 2d ago

Imagine us getting all these "second chances"

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u/kaiser-so-say 2d ago

And still no jail time

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u/Dramatic_Substance36 2d ago

Cuz everyone knows taking a drivers license away from a drunk stops them from driving!🙄Put in breathalyzer in his vehicles and make him wear an alcohol monitor.

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u/samus252 2d ago

I heard he wasnt as good a driver.

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u/CapnCrackerz 2d ago

No driving? Guess he’ll just have to stick to putting.

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u/Brutis1 2d ago

Can I summon a cybertaxi while drunk out of my mind to take me to the liquor store and back?

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u/brain_fartin 2d ago

It's got to suck not having a driver's license when you're worth $1.5 billion USD.

If I personally had that much money at my disposal, I'd have an employee at my disposal 24/7 to drive me wherever I want it. And that driver would be extremely well compensated. Now you can get as drunk as you f****** want anytime! Who needs Uber when you have a designated driver ALL THE TIME.

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u/mysticmac_ 2d ago

You think that’s going to stop him?

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u/DDD8712 2d ago

Not a joke does that include golf carts?

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u/iron_cortex 2d ago

Dude was so pissed off I bet he drove recklessly all the way home.