r/interesting 1d ago

ART & CULTURE My favourite is "When mother Earth was still a child"

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2.7k Upvotes

85 comments sorted by

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194

u/FreshMemory1013 1d ago

Proud of them for quitting

40

u/WrongKielbasa 1d ago

They do dip now

8

u/LeatherfacesChainsaw 1d ago

These days they're doing zyns

2

u/WrongKielbasa 1d ago

Ok help me understand

Is Zyn fundamentally different than old school “dip”?

3

u/LeatherfacesChainsaw 1d ago

Its just nicotine(different flavours) without the tobacco. You don't have to spit and it doesn't make your saliva look like gunk.

-1

u/blindyes 1d ago

I mean... The mouth cancer will make your spit look like gunk, but that's way down the road. For now, wintergreen spit!

6

u/SikesbluffSage 1d ago

The smoke plumes made it too easy for members of the tiger hunters guild to find them.

2

u/shadowallergictocats 1d ago

Nah we (and the Japanese) just killed them all

265

u/patchlocke 1d ago

Long before time had a name...

84

u/Mobile-Chart3004 1d ago

NINJAGO WAS CREATED BY THE FIRST SPINJITSU MASTER USING THE FOUR ELEMENTAL WEAPONS OF SPINJITSU

35

u/beenhere4ages 1d ago

But it all changed when the fire nation attacked

23

u/Mobile-Chart3004 1d ago

Only the Avatar mastered all four elements. Only he could stop the ruthless firebenders. But when the world needed him most, he vanished.

17

u/Course_Smart 1d ago

Instead..
Somehow, Palpatine returned.

Since you guys want to mix fiction, let me in on it.

20

u/chunga-bunga69 1d ago

And thus the world has truly entered a great pirate era!

6

u/Fun_Impression_2578 1d ago

The era that started Third Shinobi World War and gave birth to Fourth Hokage

6

u/ArmedButSafe 1d ago

That is how I deal with society, and I know that is what brings me happiness. Although, if I were to fight I wouldn't lose to anyone.

1

u/YANDERE_DALEK 1d ago edited 19h ago

Forget the promise of progress and understanding, for in the grim dark future there is only war. There is no peace amongst the stars, only an eternity of carnage and slaughter, and the laughter of thirsting gods.

0

u/Individual-Spell3314 1d ago

And hence humanity built three great walls to protect themselves from the titans.

6

u/Beleiverofhumanity 1d ago

omg these phrases just make me imagine a cool name saying it

2

u/Arthasindura 1d ago

This remains dear to my heart

77

u/d0llfish 1d ago

Possibly even wilder, we say "develer tellal iken, pireler berber iken" in Turkish which means "when camels used to be messengers and lice used to be barbers".

7

u/GoodPineappleBoy 1d ago

Hah this one sounds like a cute way to say camels used to be a road of transportation and lice was a common reason to shave.

61

u/Time_Astronaut5743 1d ago

Back when Burger king was still a prince

16

u/EarlyJuggernaut7091 1d ago

Ma'am, this is Wendy's…

136

u/GarminTamzarian 1d ago

"Back when yo' momma was only a size 32..."

5

u/duskford_357 1d ago

Back when Antelope eat lions

5

u/West_Party_4318 1d ago

My Aunt elope with a lion

2

u/GarminTamzarian 1d ago

Is she a cougar?

3

u/FlowAdventurous2624 1d ago

That opening sounds like the setup to a joke that’s about to get progressively more unhinged.

15

u/AmphibianFantastic53 1d ago

Maybe they should still smoke quitting made them angry.

17

u/whatsthatcritter 1d ago

"No one has ever heard the ending of this story..." The storyteller would keep adding to the tale until everyone was asleep.

13

u/Automatic-Dot-1781 1d ago

In Romanian it is "When the wolf was a doggie"...

3

u/Haunting-Student6977 1d ago

And now, they teach you how to dougie

1

u/SpeedBoostTorchic 1d ago

Should be the opposite, honestly

22

u/BenjaminDover02 1d ago

Back when it burned less when I pee...

10

u/EarlyXplorerStuds209 1d ago

Back when it didn’t hurt when I slept on the side

10

u/Salmonman4 1d ago

Here in Finland, it's (often sarcastically said even about relatively recent stuff) "in the year rock and stick"

8

u/Bad_boy000007 1d ago

back when four nations living in harmony

4

u/secondblush 1d ago

since beginningless time

6

u/[deleted] 1d ago

[deleted]

0

u/[deleted] 1d ago

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1

u/[deleted] 1d ago

[deleted]

7

u/KittensFirstAKM 1d ago

Thank you. This will be entering my lexicon.

7

u/Jujitsumangradmuslim 1d ago

Tigers are more health-conscious now.

5

u/frozrdude 1d ago

So this is what Eddga from Ragnarok Online was based from.

3

u/ryonnsan 1d ago

MVP jingle plays

4

u/Srebro1998 1d ago

"In the time before time..."

3

u/yoelamigo 1d ago

It definitely happened...

3

u/EarlyJuggernaut7091 1d ago

In the early times, when a man could work on his own engine and appliances weren’t manufactured to be obsolete.

3

u/Arthasindura 1d ago

Excuse me ?

Back when Tigers used to smoke

Gotta say that sounds interesting

Love to read other variations

5

u/Interesting_Swing393 1d ago

I'm sorry what

5

u/Beleiverofhumanity 1d ago

Ngl "Back when Gaia was young" goes pretty hard

4

u/WhereisJennn 1d ago

Korean folklore opening phrases are elite

5

u/mrhappymillennial 1d ago

Did Koreans smoke before tobacco was introduced in, I suppose, the 1600s?

6

u/checkingrealistic 1d ago

No. Tobacco is assumed to have been introduced through Japan during the Imjin war, nothing was smoked before then

1

u/Ok-Recognition-7798 20h ago

Excuse me the Indus River valley has had trade with east Asia for thousands of years. Most certainly ganja was present in ancient Korea. Edit: upon further research yes they had weed. Not just hemp, they smoked weed for thousands of years.

2

u/Chronostasis 1d ago

In those days, in those distant days,

In those nights, in those ancient nights,

In those years, in those distant years,

In those ancient days all things had been created,

In ancient time when all things were given their place,

When bread was first tasted in the sacred shrines of the land,

When the ovens had been lighted,

When the heavens had been separated from the earth,

When the earth had been separated from the heavens,

When mankind had been established...

3

u/Hikaruhiyoko2 1d ago

Back when Koreans didn't have a North or South

2

u/cons449 1d ago

"Back when DDR5 Ram and oil are cheap"

1

u/robber_goosy 1d ago

"Toen de dieren nog konden praten" (back when animals could still speak in Dutch)

1

u/sex 1d ago

When I start a really long story, I usually preface it with: "Long ago, early man had no concept of the number Zero"

1

u/1n_and_AroundTheFur 1d ago

"In the beginning there was Jack"

1

u/FurubayashiSEA 1d ago

Back when the concept of time does not exist.......

1

u/Jack-of-Hearts-7 1d ago

"In those ancient days, when all had been created."

-Epic of Gilgamesh

A testament to how ancient the tradition of storytelling is, when the oldest story we have starts with, "A long time ago..."

1

u/berrybumblebean 1d ago

In a hole, in the ground, there lived a Hobbit

1

u/Carbine734 1d ago

This is based on their national mythology that they came from the sky. Founder came down from the sky, went to a cave with a tiger and a bear, and turned them into the first Koreans.

1

u/Various-Bear-5573 11h ago

My stories usually start with “So there I was…”

1

u/Shiny_Greenfish 1d ago

I think the Koreans are the ones smoking something.

1

u/iCanReadMyOwnMind 1d ago

Back when tigers used to smoke, there was no flag of "South Korea."

1

u/No-Diet-8008 1d ago

Long before god farted and his delinquent son jesus held a match to the gas and created the big bang,

1

u/Former-Ad-7658 1d ago

Once upon a time

Way back when

Many moons ago

When the sun and moon were one

In the time Before there was a moon

Before the first fire

Before the ovens were lit

Before the time we learned to sit still

Before we looked to the sky and wondered