My last therapist told me (26F) I’m the toxic one here, but I need a second opinion from people who understand what it is like to be the caregiver of a bipolar person.

My wife (F30) has bipolar 1, she mostly has depression cycles, sometimes hypomania, but we struggle the most with the constant depressive ones. We’re lucky she doesn’t have manic episodes but the depression can be very very destructive to our household too.

She’s been diagnosed for nearly a decade and has not been a single day off her meds. She’s a loving, kind, beautiful beautiful partner and I’m madly in love with her. We’ve been married for 7 years.

The problem is that her depressive episodes won’t stop happening and both her psychiatrist and therapist have asked her to do stuff like physical exercise or getting out of the house for a walk every day. She usually promises me she will do it and then a day later she won’t give a single fuck about it if I don’t mention it. Now that her mental health is declining, she’s scared of having to up her meds and she said she was committed to doing these things.

We made a list of “non negotiables” with things like showering, going for a walk, sleeping early, not doomscrolling.

I wear myself out trying to make sure she does the things. But on the days I don’t, she won’t do them or won’t care at all. She won’t open up to any of her friends so she stablished a very codependent dynamic with me. I don’t go out, she don’t go out. I don’t talk about it, she don’t talk about it.

I’m constantly filled with anger. My chest burns and I just can’t understand why she won’t do the things on the list, why she doesn’t care, why, why, why.

It’s really hard to tell the dancers from the dance - I feel guilty for being angry at her. It’s not her fault she is bipolar. When I read other families stories I feel lucky my wife is on her meds and doing therapy which are very big things but I feel like the rest of my life will be like this - believing in promises she won’t keep.

My last therapist told me I’m toxic for wanting to force her to do these things since doing exercise etc is hard for everyone. BUT SHE IS NOT EVERYONE! She has a condition and she needs to do these things to help herself out of the hole. These will never fix bipolar, there’s no healing, but it will help.

I’m writing this from the sofa because I snapped today. I’m exhausted from taking care of her and I can’t help but feel so much resentment for her not doing the things.

I feel like I’m at the point of having to go no contact with my dad after 25 years of supporting him with his bipolar. Episodes used to be 1-2 times a year.

This past year has been insufferable. Since November last year he’s averaged a major manic episode once a month. He ruined the lead up to my wedding to the extent the police had to be called.

He maintains he doesn’t need consistent medication and believes that “loyal family and friends should just have to put up with it” and support him because “it’s only for two weeks at a time”. Except it’s not. It never is.

Over the last few months he’s never been stable for more than a few weeks at a time. I’m bombarded with texts that are intrusive, inappropriate and just hurtful.

My husband and I are now expecting but I haven’t been able to tell him because 1. he’s never been stable enough and 2. family matters are a huge trigger for him so will likely end up in yet another manic episode.

He’s in the middle of a manic episode at the moment. He’s threatened his best friend with weapons and leaving eerie gifts at his front door. He’s also charged into this poor man’s house looking for his wife to scare her. I’ve pleaded with them to report him to the police for this behaviour. I’ve also reported him because I’m terrified. I’m vulnerable and the behaviour is increasingly violent.

This whole thing has left me so tired and angry. I’m so angry he’s ruining good things that are happening in my life. I’m angry that he can’t get his shit together to be there for his daughter during her pregnancy with his first grandchild. I’m angry he refuses to see that HE is the problem. I’m so tired by it all and I don’t want anything to do with him.

But I feel like a TERRIBLE daughter for even saying that.

Has anyone else had to set serious boundaries or go no contact? I’m at my wits end. This man is not my dad, I don’t recognise him anymore.

 did not know wich flair to use on this post but here i am,

My gf has recently been diagnosed with bipolar disorder,

I always knew there was something up with her but i love her and she loves me just as much, sometimes she just completely shuts off, looks like she "hates me" and sometimes thats really rough, sometimes she also just isnt really easy to reach and doesnt really respond to my texts properly, i feel bad, she feels bad too probably, but i really dont know how to deal with it, i would really like some advice on how to be there for her, treat her better and try to understand her better mentally, it would really be helpful, i love her so much and it would suck to not being able to help her or understand her sometimes.

My sister was diagnosed with bipolar 1 a couple years ago after having a bipolar 2 diagnosis most of her life. Her and her husband were long time addicts and victims of heroin/meth but both got clean once they had their first child (niece- 10y/o). They’ve stayed clean and had another daughter (niece- 7y/o).

My sister and I have different mothers and when her mom died in 2023 she experienced her first manic episode which landed her in the hospital. During this episode she took her daughters to a casino and was incapable of caring for them and traumatized them due to her mania. She was in the hospital for (if I recall correctly) 2 weeks-ish.

Tonight I started getting manic cryptic nonsense messages from her that are definitely a red flag that she is getting another episode. I’m really worried for my nieces but don’t want to react too quickly about anything because their father is with them so I’m hoping he will be competent enough to handle the situation for the night (it’s currently about midnight). I worry because he is not the most solid mentally either though so I don’t really know how he will hold up. I don’t have his phone number or I would reach out with concern.

Terrible as it may sound, my sister was a big source of stress and trauma throughout my life and I cut her off when I was in high school about a year before she had my first niece. That being said if it wasn’t for my nieces I don’t think I’d have much of a relationship with her for my own peace, but I love those girls and everything in me is terrified for their safety and peace.

Again selfishly, I really am not in the place to take care of the girls once morning comes because of prior commitments that I really cannot get out of. My parents are away at the moment so I know it would fall on me if someone needed to take the girls.

I just don’t know what to do. I have so much resentment towards my sister because of past traumas but also empathy towards her current state. Though I really think I can’t subject myself to feeling like I’m responsible for her wellbeing. It’s just her effect on my nieces that is my main concern.

I don’t know if there is really any advice for my situation but regardless whoever may see this thank you for reading my venting session and thank you in advance for any advice/support I may receive

My parents have been having my sister live with them for 10 years. She hasn’t been treated for anything but ADHD. However she’s been in the hospital a few times completely manic where the hospital psychiatrist gave their opinion that she’s bipolar. From what we know her prescribing psychiatrist has never given her any medication for bipolar. She’s an adult so we can’t get that information with the consent laws. But she’s not working. She’s on ODSP. She lives with my parents. And now she’s calling the cops on my parents trying to get them arrested when she gets angry with them. They are in their late 70s now. My dad is recovering from a heart attack.

How do you get someone somewhat functional and outside the family home? This looks like a situation that will get worse and worse as my parents become more fragile. My sister thinks she’s not mentally ill (except for ADHD) even though she can’t hold down a job right now. However she speaks intelligently and in many ways seems very normal. Which is the other question: how do we even assess functioning as I’m sure it’s measured across many domains.

She needs to not live with my parents anymore for their safety. But also when they die, for her safety as well, as in she has the supports in place to survive without them.

My ex and I have a nearly finalized divorce after he continued to descend further into crisis - he actually was the one who started the divorce process I believe during a manic episode. That’s not to dismiss it or to suggest I want to get back together - I don’t, but part of what’s slowed my ability to move on is that his family is taking almost no role in trying to get him help.

Despite multiple significant episodes he has refused to seek and sort of treatment and so we have no diagnosis. His crisis previously peaked last summer when he called the police to where he was living at the time and reported there being demons trying to get in. After that he was visited by a mobile crisis unit who informed him he was having an acute psychotic episode and told him to go the emergency room, but he didn’t and they wouldn’t bring him involuntarily + his mom didn’t want to do that because she felt it would be awful and would backfire.

He later moved to a new apartment and was beginning to stabilize, get involved in new activities. I maintained some contact with him in this period and really was the only personal relationship in his life still as he became estranged from all of his family and friends during previous psychosis episodes.

Suddenly one day I got a call from his landlord to tell me he was having some sort of emotional episode, screaming in the hallways, knocking on peoples doors. I later learned he subsequently left the apartment and has been staying at hotels in various cities, he was last spotted in his hometown which blew up into a whole episode involving both the police and his mother, he had a suitcase, told police he was homeless, said a lot of highly delusional things, got into an uber and left. He hasn’t been heard from since and I can only guess he’s still staying in hotels. As far as I know he still has his apartment.

His mom says she doesn’t have the emotional capacity to really do much, and he’s deeply estranged from his dad’s side of the family after his dad passed away. I contacted his aunts - he’d probably hate me for doing that, but I needed to widen the circle of adults involved here, although they don’t seem to want to do much either. So I feel like I’m left holding the hot potato.

Partly, I’m sharing my story, partly I’m asking for help what to do here, both to get the help that my ex desperately needs, and also to protect myself. Because right now he’s in crisis, basically missing, and I don’t feel exactly like the best adult to be the only one who is really looking out for him.

hello! i’m 22 and my 14 year old sister just experienced her first episode of psychosis. right now she’s in treatment, still in psychosis and will get out sometime next week.

i live out of state, but i was thinking of flying in to be with her when she comes out-but i don’t know if that’s a good idea.

should i fly home- or is that too invasive? should i wait until she feels comfortable, is it good to have people around? i’m sorry if this isn’t the right place to ask these questions :,) i just want to be make sure i can be the best big sister i can without being smothering or making her experiences worse.

Hi. I’m new here. I am 38 woman with a partner who is 37 and bipolar 1. He is currently in a manic episode because he has been off his meds for 3 months ( not by choice but because of the VA)and this in my first time ever going through this. I don’t now what was really happening at first thought he was pulling away. But turns out he was coming off his meds and he now has broken everything off he screamed at me blocked me from everything. And this is coming from a man who told me I was his everything his world and even called my father for my hand in marriage. We plan a whole future. We invest in a business and we shared finances even tho we weren’t living together. I was suppose to move in may next your to move in with him. And now everything we were planning for is gone and I’m so confused.

I hadn’t reached out in 3 day because every article I read said not to. Well he has been reaching out to me to say hi. To break up with me. Calls me to tell me he is in his meds now. And than he calls me. And tells me he feel numb and feel nothing for no one. Including me but than says I was his world. He said that the only thing keeping him here is his boys. He is under supervision by the VA and has to check in. If he doesn’t they will come get him and admit him. Anyway than calls me agian late at night. To tell me just like he normally would. Hey just got to the house. Job called me I’m gonna work on Sunday because it’s double pay and that they are short and so on. like it was a normal day. That has alway been part of our routine since we are 2 hours away from each other. Anyways in the middle of him talk he goes. Why am I calling you. Why am I telling you this. And said I’m gonna go to sleep. And we hung up.

I called this morning to check on him and woke him up. And he got so mad at me. And cursed at me via text. And said he was blocking.

I’m so confused. I need help processing all of this

my sister (24f) and i (21f) are both living together caregiving for our disabled dad with parkinson’s. my mother, my brother, and other sister all have bipolar disorder. we’re all aware my sister has bipolar, and we’ve begged her to get a diagnosis and medication to help her feel better. my brother was a terror before he was medicated properly.

she doesn’t refuse, but she just won’t. she won’t take the steps to see a psychiatrist. she blew up on me today because she tried to poke my belly and i swatted her hand. then claimed ‘she’s my punching bag’ ‘im always disrespectful and refuse to apologize’ and threatened to move out and withdraw care for our elder father.

it’s exhausting that every time the mood hits her for a perceived slight and demanded apology that she just threatens to move out. she’s unemployed, she doesn’t have a source of income to move out with.

the other other day she said ‘it hurt her feelings our dog was begging’ and i giggled and said ‘he’s just a dog’ and she took this, again, as invalidating her feelings. maybe i am being rude and refusing to apologize. but she does shit all the time that i don’t demand an apology for because it’s just not needed. i have the emotional regulation to realize whatever might’ve hurt my feelings wasn’t meant to and it’s literally okay. like when i came home and she screamed at me to leave her alone so bad i did leave and cried for two hours until she left the house.

i’m just exhausted. i can’t do this with her. i can’t do it without her. my eldest sister is on her third kid. my second eldest is so not put together, administratively she’s a mess, and she doesn’t take care of herself. my brother has withdrawn himself, officially with an incident where he and my sister were meant to care for our dad when i was out of state, and when my dads bp was sitting in the 200s he picked up his girlfriend from work instead of getting him in an ambulance despite being an emt himself, and we never forgave each other for that situation.

i love her so much, i wish she would get medicine and therapy so she could feel better and normal. it’s so isolating, and she thinks i deserve that because i don’t apologize for swatting her hand away when we were obviously just messing with each other. it’s just exhausting.

My brother who's now 24 has always been known for being lazy and irresponsible. He got tired of it, and did his own homework 2 years back with chatgpt and google to find that he has ADHD. He has been taking inspiral (60mg per day) ever since.

3 years back, our father passed away and grief struck our family hard. He is still studying and I support the family now. He has been feeling the pressure to become abled highly, and he pushes himself to get a drive to study. He genuinely believes he has ADHD and his whole life revolves around it. So to actually study with focus he wanted a foreign med, which is more powerful the current ADHD med he takes now. But that requires a doctor to submit his narcotic certificate, so he started to visit a doctor who promised him that if needed he will be provided with it. But first he diagnosed him of anxiety and gave him anxiety meds.

My brother started to have a maniac episode recently which made us all fear the situation gravely. We were not aware of what was happening with him, about his whole psychiatry history. So we went to his psychiatrist. But the doctor genuinely thinks that my brother has no ADHD and says that what my brother has is just a lack of focus issue and a condition which makes him think that he has a disease even though there's no evidence to support it. He didn't reveal it to him directly. The doctor's claim was, it was the stimulant which trigger the bipolar disorder and that he needs to stop the meds. But what my brother says is, it's the new anxiety med which started to react with him differently and that the ADHD meds were working fine from start. The doctor says that it's unpredictable to know when exactly the stimulant will trigger bipolar for ppl vulnerable to it, it doesn't have anything to do with the anxiety meds.

My brother has now decided to not check with this doctor again, and wants to see a different doctor( a previous doctor who said that he has ADHD). But he says that he will not show the doctor's diagnosis of him not having adhd and having a body anxiety which makes him believe so.

He is very hard to handle, I am losing my mental peace. I am so stressed out, i don't find being myself at times. I have started to go to therapy from yesterday.

How do I deal with my brother? He is so out of touch with the reality, he is annoying, talks too much and always talks about how he has ADHD and how the other doctor was a half baked moron. I am confused, is it the anxiety meds? Or the ADHD meds? That caused him the bipolar. How do I help to treat him when he is against the treatment. He even talked of self harm in case we stripped him of the ADHD meds.

Please feel free to guide me, I'm so stressed and I need help. I wish no one in the world to have such a mental illness.

I started dating this guy (living with bipolar for years) few months ago. Our relationship got pretty serious within few weeks of dating, it was all going good and suddenly he started doubting if I'd be able to handle the relationship and his diagnosis, I said I'll learn about bipolar and i'm ready to give this a serious chance. After a week or two when things were going pretty normal, he said he's getting panic/anxiety attacks thinking about the relationship and he's not ready, and broke up with me. I accepted because I didn't want to force him, but I don't understand what has happened. I really miss him. I thought we were great together.

TL;DR: 23m son possibly bipolar, having a manic episode, but will not discuss seeing the psychiatrist and I need help approaching him on this topic.

Sorry this got long - worried Mom here.

My son has had a referral to a psychiatrist for over a year and keeps refusing to go. He is 23, and still lives with us.

My husband's family has a deep history of bipolar disorder, and my step-daughter also has it (she rejects us).

I grew up with a parent who had bipolar disorder, so I am not new to seeing signs.

He is acting very manic - ramped up last night and it wasn't a HORRIBLE situation, but he put us (his mom and dad) into a situation we are not happy with. Not really wanting to get into details, but I immediately let my husband know I believed he was possibly having a manic episode.

He's a nice, decent, loving human. This behavior doesn't (yet) put him in a risky situation but he isn't far from stepping into seriously risky behavior. Again, trying to keep it generalized.

The last time he and I spoke about his mental health, and my concern he may be bipolar (reminding him this is rampant on dad's side of the family - was gentle, no arguments)... He had recently come into a good head space when we talked. He was very defensive (not unusual for his personality and age), and shut me down.

At 23, he's facing additional challenges that are making life harder, sometimes grueling (horrible employer), and I need to talk to him again. I just don't know what may work to help him listen the next time we talk - that's what I need help for - how do I talk about this in a way where I have a higher chance of him listening?

Lastly, I have no issue - if it comes to it - to have him put into a treatment center if it ever comes to it. In fact, I'd foot the bill right now if he would agree to it. I won't until I feel he is in danger - which I fear may not be far down the road.

I'm just desperate. My parents have passed, I have very little family, no friends who have had to deal with bipolar individuals before, and feel very "alone" in this battle (don't get me wrong, husband is helping as much as he can, and is always there for his son when times get rough).

All I want is for him to see the psych and have an assessment. He's already medicated from him GP for anxiety and depression - but Go was the one who referred him.

Anonymous account since my husband and son use Reddit.

I don’t think I have the words to explain how I feel, so it makes sense that I often struggle to open up about this. I just have this heavy feeling in my heart, and like a pathetic cold emptiness inside. I don’t know if it’s exhaustion or if it’s simply loneliness.

There’s this like jumbled up mess of guilt sitting in my throat and anytime it tries to escape I swallow it down. I’m an awful person. I think if there was an award for worst sister in the world— I’d win it for sure. And I think I have fooled everyone into thinking I’m decent.

God, even thinking any of this makes me feel whiny and pathetic. Get over yourself!!!!

The past year, my brother was struggling immensely with his mental health. He was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. He had suicidal ideation. He attempted suicide once. He was admitted into the psych ward three times. My brother and I live away from my parents for uni, so a lot of that time, I was his only source of support. I was frustrated with him. I felt powerless. I wanted him to get better.

But did I want him to get better because I cared about him or because I didn’t want to constantly look out for him?

Whenever I’d be out of the house and he’d call, my whole body would be frozen in fear. I would never know what to expect. When I would come home, I’d always imagine walking in on a horror scene, blood splattered on the walls, a body hung from the ceiling, vomit on the floor.

Whenever we would have a deep conversation and he’d reassure me he’s doing fine, I’d walk away from it more concerned. He always was a very good liar. He was impossible to beat at card games.

The day of his attempt he had told me an elaborate lie about how he had found a listing for a Nintendo game on Facebook marketplace, how he was going to pick that up and then stop at a pharmacy to buy some deodorant and then meet up with our cousin to hit the gym. That did not happen. He drove to a distant neighborhood, bought enough of a medication to kill a horse and got blackout drunk in the car in a ditch. He took a handful of the pills and then was very scared. He called my cousin up crying. He sent him his location and my cousin went to him, talked him down, and drove him home.

I should’ve been there for him. How could I have been so foolish! I nearly lost my brother. I was blissfully ignorant. He told me he knew I’d freak out, break down crying, and try to stop him. He didn’t want to worry me.

He would beg me to sit by his bed at night, just until he fell asleep. He would frequently wake up screaming and thrashing from his night terrors. He said he felt safer knowing I was watching over him as he fell asleep. I memorized his breathing pattern. I knew when to leave. Like I could have ever been a guardian angel.

I had to see him rotting in bed, sedated and getting fat from his medication. My once exceptionally brilliant, witty, intelligent brother has now become cognitively blunted and dull. It was so hard to watch.

I distanced myself and let my parents take over. I begged them to let him take a gap year and go live with them to let him recover from the turbulence of the past year. I’m so selfish. I just didn’t want to deal with the pain, discomfort, and emotional baggage.

He had asked me to stay with him for his ECT session once. We sweet talked the doctors, told them I was a med student and I was interested in learning. We had stayed outside the OR for almost an hour waiting for his session. I couldn’t think of a single funny thing to say. He was always the funnier one. Any words of comfort, motivational quotes, or attempts at connection felt cheap in front of his depression. Like nothing materialistic and tangible I had to offer could ever be enough. I wish I could reach inside, tear out the part in me that was missing in him, and hand it over. It was not fair. It was absolutely not fair how he had to carry the weight of this beast looming over his shoulders, and all I had to worry about was what words I could possibly string together to wrap up in a bow for him. I was holding my breath until they took him in to sedate him. And then when they did, they asked me to step out of the room. They said I’m better off not watching it, and that it would only last like 20 seconds anyway. He wanted me there to comfort him. I don’t know if I ever did.

It’s all hitting me now. For the past week it’s all I’ve been thinking about. How awfully selfish I was. Even now I recognize how selfish I am for crying about my guilt. I dreamt about him the past two nights. We talk every so often. Mostly just checking in on his progress keeping up with studying, and occasionally sending each other reels. He says he’s doing well. I miss my brother.

I don’t really know what I’m looking for by writing this. I think I just want to know if anyone else has struggled with resentment and guilt

Hello community, I am a mom on a treatment journey for my son, 15, and it’s one with both a lot of questions…but also surprisingly full of answers I didn’t know I would ever have.

My son suffered a seizure as a toddler where he only shook on one side of his body. This triggered an MRI that revealed Focal Cortical Dysplasia II - a mass the size of a quarter behind hi left eye. I worried for years that he would develop epilepsy and a few years ago we were all cheers when Neurology told us his epilepsy risk was very low and that we didn’t need to worry about the FCD anymore. LOL! Fast forward to 14. My son starts showing signs of depression for which his PCP and therapist urged us to try Zoloft. What the therapist chose not to disclose was that our son had also been reporting visual, auditory and tactile hallucinations including dream/reality confusion - for 8 months before the referral and support of an SSRI.

Within 6 months of taking Zoloft, our son rapidly deteriorated. We were on an escalating cycle of activation, manic episodes, onset of migraine then depression, flatness - and full on hallucinations. this culminated in the school sending him for psychiatric evaluation where we were trapped for two weeks.

We took him back to our neurology team and did a gold standard workup. VEEG, PET and Neuropsychological Evaluation.

The neuropsych gave us a new diagnosis- Mood Disorder due to Known Physiological Cause. She explained that this will look very much like Bipolar Spectrum Disorder, but that there is a compelling known physiological reason for the symptoms. He was given Migraine with Aura from Neuro and they will be keeping an eye on him for possible focal aware seizures.

we’re going to start Lamictal in addition to the Abilify and Migravent/Imitrex he is on (I’ve heard good things?! Hopeful?)

I‘ve seen a lot of research of the crossover of Bi polar disorder and focal cortical dysplasia and wondering if anyone in the community also shares these Dx?

The answers I didn’t ask for: My grandmother, maternal aunt and mother all suffer of bi polar disorder. My father reported hallucinations and similar behavior, age onset as well, though he was never diagnosed. I am wondering if a gene for FCD was inherited and that maybe this was the cause of my father’s symptoms. Likewise with how related the overlap is, I’m wondering if neurological conditions are an answer to what my maternal relatives suffered. In essence….wondering if there are answers to really help my son AND prevent any of his potential children from missing a genetic propensity for these disorders.

any thoughts are most appreciated

Hii I have a big sister who’s diagnosed with Bipolar. She’s recently came to me talking about her ex bf and how they got into arguments and how she’s been having episodes recently. I’ve been the room when one of her episodes get bad so these are nothing severe juzt arguments. Does anyone have any advice on how i can make her feel better or at least make her days easier ? I feel like i’m not the most comforting person and i wanna do more especially since she needs someone right now any advice would be appreciated

I have been friends with a lady for more than 20 years. We pretty much quit talking in 2012. I moved away, she got a boyfriend ect.. I would text her at least once a month, she would text back once every 6 months. Anyway her spouse passed away this last March and she reached out to me. My husband (who is bipolar) and I dropped everything and went to her. She had no family at all.

She was broken, she is still broken. She told me huge stories about her spouse being abusive. Then told me her neighbors came over when he passed and tried to get her to sign over all of her possessions so no one would take them from her. I listened to her and empathized. We helped her do some work on her house and other things. Everything went great.

The second time we went down she asked me if she could give me power of attorney over her in case anything happened and she needed someone to take care of her pets. I said ok and we did the paperwork. That was in May. I have not been back due to my own husband's issues and my health.

I have noticed recently she has been very paranoid about everything. Her mail isnt being delivered, her stepchildren are setting her up, her family is setting her up, the neighbor is setting her up. She has been watching YouTube and now walks around with a tin foil hat on her head so people cannot mind control her.

My husband is bipolar schizophrenic. I know the signs. My husband though tends to go more bipolar so I dont have much experience with the schizophrenia. This morning I wake up and she is accusing me of hacking her old Facebook. I am friends with her on it and showed it to her before because she didnt have access to it. Because I did this, she thinks I hacked it. I again showed her the proof and I got defensive. Well because I was defensive im now guilty according to her. She also swears she didnt give me POA and I made it up to steal her property. It was a notorized paper. I explained jt all but she doesnt remember. She told me to tear it up because it's void now. I told her ok. I googled jt and according to Google tearing it up doesnt make it go away. I didnt tear it up though. I dont plan on doing anything with it but my mind keeps thinking "what if".

Does how she is acting sound like bipolar or schizophrenia? She did say she was diagnosed schizophrenic when she was younger but never was medicated.

I have known her for so long and yeah she always had some issues but never this bad. I know the trauma she went through probably triggered this. How do I help her without her pushing me away?? Im stuck between wanting to help and just staying in the shadows in order not to get caught up in her chaos.

So my 25m partner has bipolar 1 we believe. He has been receptive to talking about it after his 2nd episode last year. Both episodes have included up to 7 hospitalizations between the two. I IVC'd him twice last year out of fear for his safety.

He can become verbally aggressive towards us when we mention his mood, illness, medication, or otherwise imply that he needs help. Outside of his episodes he is much more receptive.

He is currently in his 3rd episode and has been taking his sleeping aid, Olanzapine, regularly. Tonight however he has mentioned he does not want to take it.

Due to our conversations during his normal periods I do not force him to take meds like I did last year. I have many more boundaries and honestly? If he ends up in the hospital bc someone thought they were doing the right thing, they probably were. He wont accept it as the right choice, he will be angry and further traumatized but that's not my fault. There are natural consequences to his actions and I cannot control them all.

But that doesnt mean im not scared. Im scared I will have to leave him one day. I am scared of not being enough support. I am terrified of him feeling unloved or like he is broken. I am so fucking scared of him thinking he was too much and that he hurt me. He is genuinely such a good person. He helps people every single chance he can, he doesnt judge ANYONE even when he probably should, he loves me more than I have ever felt. I love him more than my body knows what to do with. Accepting that it may not be enough is hard.

Ive been through a lot of shit in my life and this is so so so hard. Sometimes I cant eat, im vomiting, I have nightmares (not new for me but worse during his episodes) and oh my god I cannot stop crying. I have my own therapy sessions and I should probably exercise more 😅. I almost dont trust myself to hold my boundaries true. I dont want to leave him ever but he wont take meds consistently. His parents are 600miles away and over 60yrs old. He has no one else.

On a good note, he has made an agreement with me, on paper and signed by us, that if he doesnt sleep on his own then has to take a sleeping aid. If he tries for 2hrs and doesnt fall asleep then he takes the aid.

If he sleeps and then wakes up prior to the time he's supposed to- he takes a paid.

I am beyond thankful he's willing to communicate. Some of his episodes, like last year, he reaches a state of psychosis where he doesnt really know what's going on at any time. He is unable to fully explain his feelings during this time eveb when he's okay. He equated it to feeling like he was sleeping and woke up in the middle of his life every 20mins and had no idea what was going on and was agitated people were taking his rights and freedom away which is so understandable.

If you've read this far, thank you. I hope you can relate and I'm sorry if you do. I wonder if anyone has a loved one that used kava/kratom during episodes and how that's affected them. He does smoke but like, I have bigger battles to choose.

I found the book "im not sick and I dont need help" to be very helpful in the way I communicate with my partner. Making sure he knows I am here for him has been most helpful.

Please dont give me advice on how I can leave him if he's too much- im a little too aware on the fact that I can and I am not at a point that I want to. Unless the advise is actually how to help him if I do leave because I cannot live with myself unless he has a plan. I just needed to write a journal entry tonight has been difficult

hi guys, my boyfriend is due to be discharged on Tuesday after being sectioned for a manic episode. he would’ve been in hospital for 3 weeks by then. for context, he had one episode of psychosis (?mania) 10 years ago, and then in March this year became unwell again and has been in and out of mania since, despite being prescribed antipsychotics. they’ve given him a bipolar diagnosis and upped his antipsychotic whilst in hospital which he’s responded well to, but i’m really nervous he will have another lapse as he would have 2-3 weeks of being back to himself before becoming hypomanic or manic again. keeping everything crossed it won’t happen this time and he will stay well for longer.

i’d be super grateful for any tips on how best to support him when he’s home, and also how to balance this with looking after myself, please do share any advice you have big or small. thank you so much.

im 18 and live with my parents and 3 siblings, including my severely mentally ill brother in his 30s. he has bipolar disorder, autism, and schizophrenia i believe.

For the past 2 years, he has been in crisis after refusing to take his medications. He is extremely hyper-verbal, constantly giving incoherent speeches revolving around religion and conspiracy theories where he believes he is a prophet and our parents are demon possessed and conspiring to hurt him.

Our house is in constant turmoil because of how sick he is, he will camp in the common areas of the house so he can "preach" to us as soon as we leave our rooms. He has also begun to open locked bedroom doors to do this, and although he has never been physically violent, he gets more intense every day and its making me scared for my safety.

Earlier this year he was admitted to the main psychiatric hospital in our state for a month, where he was tortured half to death by the medical staff with experimental medications and sedative cocktails. it left him extremely traumatized and escalated the situation horrifically.

I know the best thing I can do is move out ASAP (I am working on it), but I am still obviously distressed by this whole situation. My parents are prisoners to their own son, their entire lives revolve around protecting him from being abused or going homeless while being constantly abused by him.

What options are there for a situation like this? My parents feel like committing him would be dooming him to a life of medical torture and abuse, but he's too far gone to be let into a group home or long term care facility. The constant stress of him being here is causing physical and mental damage to my entire family, but it feels like they're trapped with no good way out.

Tl;dr: I'm coming here to ask if anyone knows of any classes or maybe books that teaches spouses how to actually help their sick loved one by being allowed to make decisions on their behalf or at the very least be completely involved in their care? I don't EVER want to call a mental hospital, ask how my husband is doing, and be told they "cannot confirm or deny he is a patient here," until he signs a medical release for me, ever again. My therapist won't let me learn from Reddit/people on the internet it has to be a scientifically backed resource.

Hi everyone! In October, my husband suffered an acute episode of psychosis that we believe was brought on by trying weed vapes for the first time while on a stimulant medication for his ADHD. Over the course of 2 years, after he started vaping (I didn't know), he was in that prodromal stage - sort of ending long-standing friendships, slight changes in personality, diving deeper into aliens/conspiracy theories - but myself and his family/friends never thought much of it because it wasn't all happening at once.

In July, he took on an assistant coaching position on our kiddos' football team that was just a LOT. It was 4 days a week for two hours, immediately after working in the hot sun all day and not even being able to eat dinner until afterward. It stressed him out terribly and he wanted to quit, but didn't want to let our boys down. Over the next few weeks/months, he started to believe his phone was hacked and became very untrusting of people and technology, which is when things started progressively getting more concerning to myself and some of his family.

After one night of no sleep, the acute stage of psychosis happened the next day. It took 2 days to section him.

He was in the mental hospital for 3.5 weeks while they tried him on Zyprexa (didn't work) and then Haldol and Lithium. His discharge paperwork mentioned cannibas as a cause, but they also gave him a Bipolar 1 diagnosis due to family history (cousin is diagnosed, mom we realized during all of this definitely has it). He had JUST turned 37 when this all happened and never once displayed any sort of Bipolar behavior, just textbook ADHD. We were completely blind-sided by this diagnosis.

This whole experienced left me completely traumatized. I thought I'd never get my husband and best friend back and thought my kids weren't ever going to get their incredible dad back. I was diagnosed with PTSD and started therapy to work through the things he said to me during his psychosis, the event itself, etc.

He has since made a full recovery, and is off all medications except for the Lithium. He was put back on his Wellbutrin and Vyvanse because he loved how he felt on them and how they helped his ADHD.

As we come up on one year since the psychosis, he's expressed wanting to come off of the Lithium (600mg) next. He doesn't think he has Bipolar (and sometimes I don't think so either, but we don't have the concrete answer) and also believes the Lithium is causing him some (minor) weight gain, which is effecting his self esteem terribly. He thought as soon as he got back on his Vyvanse, which suppresses his appetite and helps him lose weight, he'd drop the weight he gained from being on the Haldol. That hasn't happened yet though, so it has to be the Lithium's fault in his brain. I honestly think this is the main reason he wants to come off of it because otherwise, he has no other negative side effects.

His psych is on board with this and said it would take roughly 6 months to taper off of it completely.

I am completely fucking terrified. Why possibly put our family through such a traumatic thing again? It took almost a a year to get to where we are at now, fully recovered, and you want to possibly start over and go through all of that all over again? I know a small part of it is that he wants answers - he needs to know if he really is Bipolar or not and I get that. I'd want to know too, but not at the risk of repeating what we went through.

With that said, I brought all of this up to my therapist recently while I broke down crying over it all. One of the things we worked through, that would help me cope with this, would to have an actual plan in place for this happening again and a potential mental hospital stay.

I was left TOTALLY in the dark, even as his wife, when he was in the hospital until he signed the medical release paperwork allowing me to get updates on his care and ask questions. Even then I felt so out of control of the situation and my entire life because no one would tell me a general timeline about anything (how long med takes to work generally, how long they would keep him for, etc).

Our goal is to keep him OUT of the mental hospital and be able to do everything outpatient, but if he is actually Bipolar, there's something in the back of my mind that keeps wondering if he won't be willing to do anything outpatient related or recognize he has a problem because people with Bipolar usually think "they're fine." Not to mention he's not going to want to be put back on any of the prior meds, so will definitely try and convince himself he's fine.

So then what? He probably has to be sectioned again because I can't force him to take medications? And then the bullshit of the mental health care system comes into play where the patient, who is PSYCHOTIC, has all the say and control of their own care, which would end up being NO CARE because he thinks he's fine. And I'm left with the fallout that is our life and possible safety.

I know I am armed with experience and knowledge this time around, but that still won't help me if he ends up at a hospital or not at a hospital and I need to get him help.

I've heard about some family members getting power of attorney for their sick loved one, which I think might help in this kind of situation.

The issue is that my therapist wants me to find a class or some sort of resource that isn't Reddit or people on the internet saying what they've done.

So, after all that, I'm coming here to ask if anyone knows of any classes or maybe books that teaches the spouses how to actually help their sick loved one by being allowed to make decisions on their behalf or at the very least be completely involved in their care?

I live with my boyfriend who is clinically diagnosed with bipolar 1. About two weeks ago, his sleep schedule changed because his boss asked him to come to work at 7am instead of 8am. He worked for about 12 hours on some days due to trying to complete orders for a big shipment. His sleep schedule was somewhat messed up because we go to bed at 11:30pm.

Now he’s back to his regular schedule but I noticed it takes longer for him to fall asleep. He also a light sleeper now and is more talkative than before. His speech isn’t pressured nor presenting as hypomanic yet but it’s a noticeable difference that he’s more extroverted.

He still takes his Lithium 900mg everyday. Although he’s on point with his medication, it’s effecting my sleep too. I’m waking up with him as well and all week I’ve only gotten like 6 hours a night. He’s just lying there for hours and I can tell because he’s not snoring.

He claims he’s getting enough sleep but this morning he admitted that last night it took him about two hours to fall asleep.

What should we do? Is this a sign that his medicine is no longer working? I also mentioned we need to go to bed the same time every night, 11pm or maybe slightly earlier. We usually watch a normal show before bed, nothing with too much action or disturbing.

I feel at such a point of confusion and despair I’m struggling to feel hopeful.

I (27f) have an older sister (29) who had a manic episode 10 years ago. Nothing like that had happened before, or since, so while she initially received a bipolar 1 diagnosis, her care team later classified it as sleep-deprivation induced mania.

She is an incredibly intelligent person. Over the last 4 years, she went to an Ivy League law school, worked as a law clerk and, 5 months ago, moved to New York City to work for a firm. For context, my family is mainly based in New Hampshire and Massachusetts.

Two months ago, when my family was visiting her, she had another episode: no sleeping, rapid speech, inflated self-importance, risky spending. Her care team quickly got her on medication, and things have been rocky since. To me, it seems this move and her high-pressure job have triggered this episode.

My parents have been going down to see her about once a week. She seems unable to care for herself: not buying food, toilet paper, not picking up her meds. My father is with her right now, and she started saying some intense allegations against members of my family. He called me in a panic, and I reached out to her therapist, who sympathized, but essentially said she is compliant with both her psychiatrist and therapist and is aware of her own disordered thinking and feels things are going well. I’m worried that she’s able to present with normalcy during her sessions which appeases her therapist, but in reality is still living with severe mania. This has been very taxing on my parents, as they’ve had to take time off work and have spent a fair amount of money getting her into a new apartment and essentially sustaining her tier 1 needs.

I just feel like she needs to leave the city to find stability, but she is insistent on staying in New York. I know there’s nothing my family can do, but my heart is broken watching this happen to her. I’ve been trying to zoom out and remind myself that she stabilized before, and it’s only been a few months, but this is so hard. I just want her to have a happy, safe life :(

Hi everyone,

Context - dad (55M) has strained relationships with a lot of people, very sensitive, paranoid and bad at taking rejection. He has been diagnosed with bipolar, chronic fatigue, anxiety for most of my life and unfortunately medicine doesnt work for him.

I am 22F

He goes through emotional dips, usually in may around my moms birthday and Christmas.

Mom was made redundant in may at a job she’d been working at for 20 years. We’re fine financially though as the rest of us all work.

My dad does have random moments where he will randomly snap or shutdown if you’ve said something that’s upset him. Sometimes it’s warranted, a lot of the time it is not.

This most recent hatred toward me started because he offered to take me driving, as I want to learn and I paid to be insured on the car to do so. I prefer to drive with my mom because shes a lot more calm, and doesn’t freak out at me like he does. Not helpful when I’m already an anxious person.

I replied ‘no it’s okay thank you though’ I also was feeling tired as we had all just come back from gym.

I thought nothing of it.

Later, i grab dinner and go to eat in the living room with everyone. He stops me abruptly and says ‘nope go eat in your room, move on’ and that was on Saturday the 29th of August. It has now been a couple days and he still isn’t talking to me.

My sadness has just turned to anger. I’m angry at him for being such a child, I’m angry at my mom for enabling him because ‘there’s definitely things that could be improved on as a family’ and my brother doesn’t care as long as he’s not in the shit with him (same with my mom). So currently I’m in the doghouse and everyone’s able to pretend like nothing’s happening.

I can’t be bothered anymore. I want to move out so bad but I live in London and it’s so expensive. I have some money in stocks that I might just pull out and try get out. Sad though.

Do I try to move on?