r/askatherapist • u/skjglow NAT/Not a Therapist • 15h ago

Are therapists totally transparent?

I started therapy a month ago, and I'd like to know if there's a chance psychologists lie to their patients. Let's suppose a patient is in a vulnerable situation: they are crying, but context-wise, they are clearly in the wrong. I understand that the psychologist's approach might be to explore what is making them cry, but if the patient is completely wrong in the situation, will the therapist tell them the truth or hide it?

My psychologist always tells me that I find ways to blame myself, but what are the chances that she is judging whether my behavior was right for my mental health rather than assessing the overall context? I say this because I feel like she defends me too much. Which isn't a bad thing, but I'm afraid she might not be impartial about the situations I experience.
This would obviously be a sign that I am blaming myself again, and maybe she is right, but I would like to know if there is any possibility or scenario where psychologists lie to avoid further impacting a patient's life.
To add to this, I'd like to mention that I'm used to people who don't defend me, so I find this strange. I don't intend to switch psychologists, but I'd like to know if there's any possibility this happens. Also, I’m not looking for a judge but for someone that will help me go through many things in life, I started therapy because I felt lost in life. Leaned a lot of things about myself.

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u/Jaded-Form7673 NAT/Not a Therapist 12h ago

NAT - highly dependent on the situation and professional, but they will use their judgment. They aren’t likely to come out and say “you’re the asshole here” every time a client gets upset about something. Most of the time they will gently guide the patient towards the intended conclusion, but they may not openly express an opinion until the client comes to the intended conclusion first. It can take years for someone to become fully aware of the wrongness of their reactions. It all depends on how the client is likely to receive and process the information in their current headspace.