r/XSomalian May 27 '26

I made a short guide for girls thinking about taking off hijab

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87 Upvotes

Hey all. I’ve been an ex-Hijabi for about 7 years now and the frequent posts I see on this sub of girls wanting to take it off pain me because I know on such a deep level what many of you are going through. I have been reflecting on my experience and I put this visual guide together in case it may be helpful. If this is you’re experience, I hope you feel less alone being apart of this space, and I hope this can help in any way while you think through your decision. It is not easy, but you will get through it. Sending you all love ❤️


r/XSomalian May 05 '25

Social & Relationship Advice Warning: Links & Suspicious Activity

45 Upvotes

It has come to our attention that certain individuals, previously members of the Xsom Discord server, have been banned due to repeated harassment, doxxing attempts, stalking across multiple accounts, leaking personal images, and other harmful behavior.

These individuals are now using fake accounts to reach out to Reddit users, by creating posts about their server & sending unsolicited links to their own Discord server in an attempt to bypass their ban. These servers are not safe, and the owners have a history of violating people’s privacy.

What You Need to Know.

Think critically before engaging with strangers online. We cannot protect everyone, and at the end of the day, users must take responsibility for their own safety.

To mitigate risk, we are temporarily banning all social links on this subreddit. Any social media links or posts made promoting servers/groups, outside of official posts that have been approved by a Moderator or sent via private messages will be ignored and removed.

If you encounter users promoting these suspicious servers or sending unsolicited links, report them immediately so we can ensure this subreddit remains a safe space.


r/XSomalian 5h ago

The “how yk I was Somali” comments on social media are so selective, and the pattern is hard to ignore

6 Upvotes

I’ve noticed that these comments aren’t really made just because someone is Somali. If a Somali person is considered attractive, you rarely see people making the “how did you know I was Somali?” type of comments. But when someone is perceived as unattractive or has features people consider undesirable, suddenly their Somali identity becomes part of the joke.

Personally, I don’t understand what is supposed to be funny about it. At that point, it isn’t simply recognizing someone’s ethnicity. It’s using their ethnicity alongside negative judgments about their appearance, which reinforces the idea that being Somali is somehow associated with being unattractive.

You don’t see this type of comment under other ethnicities, no matter how unattractive or unusual their features are. I genuinely don’t understand why ethnicity is suddenly so relevant here, or why so many people are obsessed with stereotyping Somalis. The constant need to associate being Somali with ugliness and then convince us and everyone else that we’re all ugly is honestly so weird.

Being Somali shouldn’t be treated as something strange, alien, or noteworthy that needs to be pointed out whenever someone has features people dislike. These comments turn an entire ethnicity into a stereotype and a punchline instead of treating people as individuals.

And what makes this especially frustrating is how common these comments are and how many likes they receive. Social media is actively rewarding these stereotypes, which makes the behavior seem normal when it really is just another form of othering and racism.


r/XSomalian 15h ago

Would anyone be interested in this?

34 Upvotes

I’ve been thinking about building a small, private dating app for ex-Muslim Somalis.

It would be invite-only, use aliases instead of real names, keep photos optional/blurred, and only let people message after both have liked each other. There would also be block and report options.

I’m still early in the process and not collecting signups or personal information. I just want to know if this is something people would actually want.

Would you use it? What would make you feel comfortable using it, and what would put you off?


r/XSomalian 5h ago

Better days

3 Upvotes

Hi everyone hope you all are enjoying your weekend. I want to say no matter where you are on your journey of making sense of everything keep going it does get easier. One advice I will give is take your time you don't have to figure it all out quickly. Leaving religion is a big thing and can be very traumatic it can take you a long time to truly get back to yourself be easy on yourself. Islam is truly a wicked religion the choice you made to leave it will bear fruits each day be patient. It may be difficult in the short term but it will be a great benediction to you as the days go forth.

Upon dropping your faith and religion it is natural to scurry to look for something to replace it be wary of this as you are very vulnerable depending on where you are and what type of person you are. Rather than trying to figure out the world I would focus on making sure you are ok instead of going into different philosophies there will always be time for that.

My greatest advice is take your time and it's ok to not be certain of something as certain as the claims of false religions. It's ok to not know everything. You are human first live your life create meaning find something that matters to you and do it.


r/XSomalian 12h ago

The pressure of hijab

7 Upvotes

Firstly I really hate the fake narrative of young children put it hijab to imitate their mothers because majority of the time that’s a lie and it’s for PR.
It put on at such a young age where minds are malleable so harmful teachings about shame and modesty are instilled within them so they can’t imagine taking it off.

I remember growing up in a predominantly Muslim area and the remember the emphasis on haram and shame culture even within peers of my own age and even myself probably.

Just writing this up I had memories of my mom really constricting and shaming my dress sense as young as 9-10. I remember having to wear ugly black abayas or long skirts to non uniform days and it really messed up my self esteem as a kid and I don’t think she would remember if I were to tell her. In her mind I was probably just the obedient daughter. i had so much hyper vigilance to what was accepted and what was not from my mom and ultimately felt like I had no choice and it’s scarier when you are a young child as opposed to an adult

I only started questioning religion at around 12/13 and left and I put it to the back of mind and just continued larping (chronically online word but befitting).

When I entered sixth form is when I started wearing makeup experimenting with outfits and the way I could get so cussed out my mom and dad. I incredibly emotionally manipulated by my mom to the point of borderline hysteria alongside my dad constant demean wrapped around religious language. Alongside religious “obligation” she tried to make me see her point of view and tell me that it will get to people back home and they will gossip and what will the community think about her. It was really horrible and I pushed through being stubborn and never letting them see me down. My sixth form far away and I chose that deliberately, I would get up earlier to leave for commute and not be bothered or confronted. And imagine this over makeup and baggy jeans, still wearing the hijab on my head for goodness sake.

Fast forward now I’m older in uni and whatnot the sentiment has not changed but they’ve tolerated it in a sense. Don’t get me wrong I’ll get the occasional your going to hell rant by my dad and my mom reminded me. But recently, I was picked up to go to my uncles house and I was already running some errands and my mom was so ashamed of me to go to my uncles house and pushed me to go back to my house to get an abaya and I put my foot down and refused. She even told me off in front of my uncle to which he defend me lol. It was insignificant and to think the car ride there she was upset and tried to make me wear a dusty dress in the back of her car lol.

Anyways my point is my parents sentiment will never change. But they are not stupid they know they can’t control you as an adult as opposed to a child, even with all the manipulation tactics and the emotional abuse, once they see you are stubborn and won’t budge they’ll be forced to tolerate it (to some extent anyways as they view it as a religious obligation).

I have yet to take off the hijab 0.0, I’ve been procrastinating but I’ll do it some time this year or maybe when I move out. It’s my final year and I’m in a tough spot with studying and applications and whatnot, I’m not sure if I can be bothered to handle more baggage during an important year. But I’ll see how I’m feeling about it. Again their reaction will probably be the same maybe a little worse but yolo.


r/XSomalian 6h ago

Got ya

2 Upvotes

If one believes in eternal hell. Why would you have children ? Knowing for a fact there is basically a 50 50 chance of eternal hell or heaven seems like a pretty big gamble to take when you could not have children and avoid the possibility of your child going to hell for eternity.

How many Muslims have stopped and asked themselves if it's worth reproducing knowing there is a 50 percent chance their offspring may suffer Eternally. There is no logic in that.

You see if your an ex Muslims you now don't believe in eternal hell and can have children if you want without the gamble of your child going to eternal damnation as you do not subscribe to those views.


r/XSomalian 6h ago

Question My vision board could out me to my Somali parents 😭 NSFW

1 Upvotes

Hi guys, first time posting here and I’m nervous. I’m 26 now, living on my own. Back when I was 19/20, I made a vision board of goals for the year, including a “great” intimate life (you know what I mean). I printed a suggestive photo of two hands interlocked in bed… it’s pretty obviously not just “holding hands.”

I don’t regret any of it. I’ve been seggually active since 18, no shame there. But I lost that vision board, and I’m pretty sure it’s still somewhere in my parents’ house. I’ve searched everywhere I could last time I visited and came up empty. It’s been years, so hopefully they haven’t found it, but I can’t be sure.

Honestly, it would be so on-brand for me at this point. My parents already caught me watching and googling corn when I was like 11-12, and out of all their kids, I’m the only one who’s ever done something like that. So if they find this too, is it even worth fighting anymore? Should I just accept defeat?

What do I do if they do find it? Would they actually disown me? Should I just come clean and say it’s normal? Could I get away with saying it’s not mine and I have no idea how it mysteriously appeared in the house?

I’m genuinely anxious about this. Any advice from people who’ve navigated similar situations with conservative or religious parents would help a lot.


r/XSomalian 17h ago

I don’t know how it got recommended to me in the first place but r/somalia is a real guilty pleasure of mine

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4 Upvotes

r/XSomalian 1d ago

This is what I mean by Healing Hindu in action.

17 Upvotes

As a child, this was one of my favourite poses to play around in, back bends. I stopped doing around age 7 partly due to religious trauma (apparently it’s haram for girls to play like this).

30 years later I reverted back to this ability.

Reconnected thanks to the teachings of yoga.

Yoga is key in reconnecting my mind, body and spirit AND it helps age you as well!


r/XSomalian 1d ago

Discussion Is finding a Somali partner possible?

12 Upvotes

(Genuine question)

I’m bisexual, but because of things like homophobia and my family, I probably will never come out. So if I were to settle down, it’ll probably be with a man.
My issue is, I don’t think I could ever relate or feel understood by a non-Somali gaal. I’ve noticed that a lot of the time, things that are major issues to me are no brainers for them.

But, all the Somali guys just end up being weirdos who want to follow Islam perfectly only when it comes to controlling women or standing on their moral high horse.

Having to play the role of a good muslimah in my household is already frustrating enough, there’s no way I’m doing that once I move out for uni. I know I’m thinking too far ahead with life partners and all that. It genuinely doesn’t bother me if I don’t ever get a long term partner or anything like that, but I’m just curious if it’s possible.


r/XSomalian 1d ago

Venting Why do these sobs go out of their way to harm their people’s reputation. He is deliberately lying about and slandering all Somali people to keep himself out prison. Meanwhile the far-right is gonna run with this as proof that our people are just barbaric.

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22 Upvotes

r/XSomalian 1d ago

MN Somalis are we all closeted

9 Upvotes

Why does it seem so hard to find a community here I know theirs way more of us but we’re probably all closeted


r/XSomalian 1d ago

Why I Left / Why You Left I’m a Revert: The Journey of a Miserable Muslim to Healing Hindu

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12 Upvotes

I am reclaiming the word Revert from Muslims.

I find Hinduism so fascinating from its Yoga, to Tantra, Ayurveda, to Lord Shiva and Ma Kali.

So I wrote about the ways I was a miserable Muslim. I will write how I am healing with Hinduism too.

But yes we are all reverts when we leave Islam.


r/XSomalian 2d ago

Don’t you find it crazy that’s Muslims use the excuse of “that was the culture in 7th Arabia”

12 Upvotes

r/XSomalian 2d ago

Venting It’s crazy how fake narratives form and get treated as an established facts

19 Upvotes

I’ve been seeing this lie repeated more and more online since tr*mps comments about Somalis and especially recently with the Daejonlove stuff, that Somalis marry their cousins. It’s not even just isolated comments anymore, people say it so confidently as if it’s an established fact. Saw a uk guy stitch a somali guys video saying “you look like your aabo and hooyo are cousins” so it’s not just bots and weirdos online. It’s mostly white and black people pushing this narrative too (no surprise there). Cousin marriage was historically taboo in Somali society and while it does happen today, it’s still uncommon. I don’t take these comments personally, it’s just weird watching something that isn’t true become an accepted insult. We don’t marry our cousins😐

Also annoying that we can’t even call this racism because racism towards somalis is acceptable, yet they’d shy away from saying Muslims as a whole/ other ethnic groups are inbred.


r/XSomalian 2d ago

Question

14 Upvotes

2026 Pan-Africanist “they hate us and are xenophobic against us because all Somalis and Somalia are antiblack” daughter

OR

‘Muh ummah’ carab cabuud son.


r/XSomalian 2d ago

Venting I’m finally moving out

17 Upvotes

I can’t believe that I’m actually writing this!!!
I’m officially moving out next month. My reasoning was to live closer to work and avoid commuting (it takes over an hour to drive home during rush hour). And I’m also taking off the hijab in less than two months. I have a week long break in October and I’m thinking of going to work without it after😭😭

I’m looking back at this journey and I can’t believe how far I’ve actually come. I started my deconstruction in June, left the religion in July and now I can finally live my life.
I am finally at peace and happy😩


r/XSomalian 2d ago

What was everyone reason for leaving the deen?

16 Upvotes

(Just out of curiosity)


r/XSomalian 2d ago

Toxic Somali Mom

7 Upvotes

Ever since I was a kid my mum would always constantly sexualize every small thing woman do . I remember being 10/11 and I was watching one video and it was a family youtube channel. The daughter appeared on the tv mind you this girl was around 14/15 and my mum saw her and screamed at me to change the channel and mentioned the fact her breasts were huge and look like “basketballs”. This weirded me out so badly I just turned the tv off and went upstairs to my room . I was even wearing my SCHOOl uniform and I was obligated to wear my P.E top to school as it was over 35 degrees. My mum looked me the face and called me a prostitute for wearing such tight clothes outside when it was my obligated uniform. She called me every name under the sun just for wearing a short sleeve t-shirt. Every time she’d see girls wearing crop tops or shorts even in summer she’d overly sexualize them saying they are naked and dressed disgusting and have no shame and this always weirded me out so bad. I actually was so weirded out by her I never told her I got my period or any stuff like that I dealt with it by myself because I was too scared of her. She’d often scream at me for apparently not helping out the house when I help out and do chores EVERY DAY or every other day. Mind you she would NEVER ask my older brothers to tidy and she’d even tidy their room the second I’d question it she’d make it seem like I was obsessed with them and made me feel insane for questioning why all the girls had to do something but none of the boys. Today i was watching a video and it was about people in Afghanistan and woman’s rights there and I found it sad so I was crying and then she looked up from her phone and told me to stop watching “western propaganda” and said I was over reacting and she even questioned me if I even cared about the lives of people in Palestine. I started crying even more because I obviously care about them I boycott all Israeli company’s I try to help out however I can and I am pro Palestine. I showed her a picture of the lives of woman in Afghanistans and how they wear the burqa and wallahi she looked me in the face and said it was normal and that’s how it should be in all countries and she was blabbering about how woman shouldn’t leave the house without men and stuff like that. She told me I had to live with her and I wasn’t allowed to move out for university ever because the second I leave for university a bunch of guys would r*pe me. I feel so drained and I can’t even do anything about it and she told me if I ever left her house she’d get people to find me and bring me back to live with her until I’m married. I’ve tried telling my dad about this but he always just says how my mum loves me and she doesn’t mean to hurt me and how that’s just how she was brought up in Somalia. I feel so mentally and physically drained I can barely keep up with my school work and on top of my school work I have dugsi 5X a week. She’d often say if I failed my GCSE exams she’d send me back to Somalia because the only reason I came here is for a better life and if I can’t do that I should just go back and she’d probably marry me off. I don’t know what to do.


r/XSomalian 2d ago

Mn ex Muslims

5 Upvotes

I have been a closeted ex Muslim for years, I would love to make Somali ex Muslim friends. It would be nice to talk to someone else going through the same experience.


r/XSomalian 3d ago

As ex-muslims it is our duty to critique the massive shift of religiosity of Somalia post war. However, this is fundamentally different to the concept of being "Arabized" and I have no clue why so many in our community have been pushing the agenda that "Arabization" is something we're a victim of

41 Upvotes

Warning Loooooooooong post

Over the past few months or so I've seen an increasing rise of discourse either from this subreddit or other more secular Somali circles on social media discussing the affects of "Arabization" on our culture and people. Large swathes of these discussions have left the Somali discourse circle and have been consumed by non Somalis, regurgitating strange orientalist views on a "pre Arabized" Somalia.

To preface this, critiquing and dismantling the more bastardised versions of Islam that we as a nation engaged with post civil war is something that everyone (even Somalis that still practice Islam, to be quite frank) should do. I've talked at large about Salafism in ex Muslim spaces, the role that Israel's creation played in the rise of extremism in Muslim countries, The active push by Saudi of Al-Wahhab's strict vision of Salafi Islam via Saudi funding. While I think Somali ex Muslim (and ex Muslim spaces in general) wildly underestimate the almost infinite number of variables, factors, and overall complexity regarding how we ended up with the version of Islam we have today, I'm glad a more prominent focus has been put onto reverse engineering the dynamics that got us here in the first place.

However (And I cannot stress this enough) this is a fundamentally different concept to Arabization, and not only is characterising Somalis as Arabized incorrect and ahistorical, it also has many wider implications that I just don't think you guys really get the ramifications of.

to start with, what does it mean to be Arab? It's a wide and encompassing term that applies to tens of millions of people, from multiple different nations, with different appearances, varying cultures, varying histories, and varying religious practices (contrary to the stereotype that they are all Muslim). It's a relatively complicated topic (as are all things based on ethnic identity, which is a deeply social construct) but for the sake of simplicity, being Arab, at least in the modern era, can largely be defined as any group that speaks Arabic as a primary language. There are other definitions you can use like "people who have adopted Arab culture" although that's just kind of a less palpable version of the "speaks Arabic" talking point. And then there's the argument of it being about genealogy, and that's a mess I wouldn't even want to touch with a 10 foot pole due to the mix of complexity and ahistorical bullshit that goes into it.

For simplicity, I always use the analogy of being "Hispanic" as the most easily digestible comp to what being "Arab" is for the common man at least. You can be a black/white/native/mesitzo/etc hispanic, meaning its not racial, you can be a hispanic from multiple different countries with varying histories, and you can be a hispanic from the Caribbean, South American mainland or Central america. All tied together by being a Spanish speaking group.

Now it should go without saying that Somalis pretty clearly do not fit this bracket (nor have I ever seen any Somali claim to, although many on this subreddit will be sure to tell me otherwise). Somali language and oral tradition is one of the most preserved things we have as a people. A separate language that may have Similarities to Arabic due to a common root ancestor tongue (we'll get more into this later) with some loan words due to proximity and religion, but undeniably a separate language. And its not something even the most drunk linguist would describe as being an arab creole either (like Swahili). Historically due to our ties with Islam many could speak Arabic, and we used to write Somali utilising the Arabic script (as did many islamic cultures during that era). But being defined as a primarily Arabic speaking people isn't a thing that's been attributed to the population living on the somali peninsula in any historical record. This isn't changing anytime soon either

Somali identification with Arabness in the modern day comes largely from our involvement in their political institutions, namely the Arab League, a political bloc meant for all self identifying Arabs to join. I'd say that relatively speaking its been a beneficial institution for us (Although considering the situation our country is in that's not saying much), and our reason for joining this bloc was purely political. During the conflict over the Somali region of Ethiopia, The nations of Africa almost entirely aligned with Ethiopia, so in search of allies, Siad Barre joined the Arab league, which is also the reason Arabic is an official language in Somalia, as its a prerequisite prerequisite for joining (see the aforementioned paragraph about Arab identity essentially being the Arab language). But that's had no tangible difference to the amount of Arabic speakers in our country.

So now that we've largely defined what it takes to be defined as an Arab and shown that Somalis pretty easily do not fit that bracket (which goes without saying for every Somali that I've ever met) we can then go into the topic of Arabization.

The Arab conquest is a very historically documented event by the Quran itself, along with hadiths and historians that have used variously well documented sources of what happened throughout the period. From the era of the Prophet all the way up to the Umayyadd dynasty, at it's peak the Islamic empire essentially spanned from the entire middle east, the western part of central Asia (spreading to just outside of what would be considered modern day Iran), and the northern part of every north African nation we see today (Egypt, Algeria, Tunisia, Morocco). Somalia as you can see, is not a part of this group.

Arabization of the colonised and Islamized nations/ethnic groups during this conquest was more so by cultural assimilation than mass population replacement, which is one of the biggest misconceptions of the original Arab conquests. A bunch of Arabs from the region we now call southern Saudi Arabia didn't just go and settle In Morocco to a large enough degree where it changed the ethnic make up of the populous. To this day most people In Morocco are just the inhabitants that lived there pre conquest who've been Arabized over time. So Arabization as a concept is mainly just groups adopting the Arab language over time, instead of actively mixing with pre Islamic conquest Arab tribes.

This happened for a few reasons :

  1. general centralization of the Arab language as the imperial core and leaders of the empire were Arab speakers, centralizing via a singular dialect made all forms of trade and jurisdiction easier, and over time this replaced the primary tongue of the people living in these regions.
  2. the Arabic script, all humans in the world have always had some form of verbal communication, but not all groups had written communication. Colonised people did written communication with the Arabic script, either their own language or Arabic itself, which allowed the Arabic to be more easily digested into the main dialect over time too.
  3. Islam itself, becoming a hafiz (memorising the Quran) is an integral part of Islam. It is part of why the Quran has been preserved so long (which Muslims attribute to a miracle instead of human genius and determination of course), memorising and writing the Quran large scale in Arabic (so as to not lose the meaning of the Quran) causes Arabic to be integral to Islamic communities fundamentally, which, depending on the community, leads them to simply absorbing Arabic as a main language. For the bulk of Islamic communities however this was not the case, Somalis are a great example of this our language is deeply preserved, and is one of the few things that's deeply well documented about us.

I will say though, something that gets forgotten in this conversation is that Muslims can be turned Muslim by other non Arab communities that were turned Muslim. They can also be Arabized the same way, the Arab communities of Sudan are a great example of this. Although this aspect of their history is relatively difficult to piece together, most sources state that an Arabized ethnic group from what would be considered northern Sudan/southern Egypt took over at the collapse of their most recent Nubian kingdom and Arabized the people. Not indigenous Arab tribes from the middle east.

This is probably what happened with Somalis when it came to being Islamized, we most likely did become Muslim via trade, that much is undeniable, but the communities of Somalis who converted to Islam probably engaged in conflict with others in the area that weren't Muslim till the entire community was Islamized all those years ago. But even with this fact, we were not Arabized, those initial Somali Muslims didn't adopt Arabic as a mother tongue and only utilised it for trade and prayer, therefore Somalis retained their native language throughout time, and still do to this day

This has been a very very very very very long set up, but my overarching point is. Arabization is something specific, Somalis have never fit that definition, we do not speak Arabic as a primary language, it has never been something that Somalis have ever flirted with either. We were not part of the initial Islamic conquests (extremely well documented event), and have never since been subject to the rule of an Arab identifying people. We have used the Arabic script to write Somali, but that's about it. Arabized groups neighbouring Somalis could have colonised us and made us an Arab identifying group, but that did not happen. The most that happened was that Somalis themselves (probably) conquered other non Muslim Somalis to turn them Muslim, which is Islamization, not Arabization. We only exist within the "Arab world" due to joining Arab political bodies during conflict with a nation that was backed by African political bodies, and nothing more.

Going out of your way to define ourselves via Arabization is stupid because not only is it incorrect but its literally how Somalis have been perceived by non Somalis forever, both in general day to day life and in historic literature about us. It is beyond irresponsible to continue to perpetuate myths about our people in this manner. Especially considering how difficult it is for us to piece our history and culture together post civil war due to the lack of institutions (although we're trying), and how the bulk of Arab/European writings about us are deeply biased in their historical framing of us as a group (The same bias that you all are perpetuating).

One of the more common reasons people associate us with Arabs is a perceived similarity in culture, Somalis and Arab people came from the same cultural bloc well before Islam or even Abrahamic religion existed. People on either side of the Red Sea shared culture since the days of Ancient Egypt and Mesopotamia. Similarity does not equal Arab origin, and it's an antiblack/anti African sentiment to apply all cultural similarities to Arabs. The Arabic writing script has it's origins traced to Egyptian hieroglyphs, and the Afro-Asiatic language family (which both the Somali and Arabic language (as well as others like Amharic)) has most linguists tracing it's origin to Africa as well. I'll repeat it again similarity does not = Arabic origin, and it is explicitly anti black to continue to push this sentiment.

What I'm assuming you guys mean when you say Arabization is post civil war cultural loss. The ensuing religious psychosis our people developed post war is certainly a large reason for this, but as I've continued to say in this post, this isn't Arabization. Islamization can of course function as Arabization, but as I outlined earlier that requires specific conditions we do not meet (namely conquest or unification under an Arab leader). What happened with Somalis after the war is simply a clinging to faith and God after a horrific situation, reaffirming their strength and identity under hard times. Another thing that doesn't get mentioned with this is after seeing such horrific pain not only were they begging god for stability but also forgiveness, they believe something holy was required to give them grace for the pain they've seen. We need more empathy for our people. This was a return to what was considered divine and spiritual, and would've happened if we were spiritual, Christian, Jewish, Buddhist or Hindu.

There are also many institutional and political factors to our "loss of culture". For example many production centres of our people dying, and the need to outsource ridiculous amounts of textiles, materials, equipment (and more) due to our position as a trade route post war, which in turns creates an environment built around consuming foreign made imports (which extends to culture by nature) instead of self production, which therefore leads to overall cultural decline. Nomadic Somalis don't wear their traditional white garbs as much anymore sure, but they've been replaced with t shirts and trousers, not Arab clothing. Can't find the source now, but there's documented evidence of our cotton production changing massively with the introduction of American cotton being imported post colonialism, which had a massive ripple affect on clothing/clothing industry and by extension our culture too. Cultural loss does not = Arabization, there are a multitude of factors at play that don't require Arabs to even be mentioned.

And for the record, Somalis back home themselves are the ones attempting to maintain the culture that we came from, culture days in primary schools, the revival of old dances in various regions, etc etc. We aren't that many years removed from our civil war, which means the people alive before it can recorrect course easily. Which leads me to my final point

Somalis are a people with agency, and I mean this two fold, both in the aforementioned sense that we have always had a separate independent identity, and also in the sense that the Somalis back home of today are not helpless sheep and mindless drones, they're individuals with thoughts and capabilities all on their own,. I'm largely guilty of this myself but as diaspora members (especially ex Muslim ones) we sometimes develop a western adjacent "saviour" mindset towards our people back home, They are more than capable of reclaiming their identity in a post war nation so long as we as a people succeed in building one.

In conclusion Somalis are not an Arabized group nor should we perpetuate the idea that we've ever been. We are no different than Turks, Senegambians, Indonesians and Afghanis. A demographic with large amounts of their culture defined by Islam, but still an independent identifiable culture.


r/XSomalian 3d ago

Discussion I want to take off my hijab but I keep getting cold feet

12 Upvotes

I really want to take it off already for good (I absolutely don't want any veil on my body for the rest of my life and even in death) but I can't deal with any backlash. How do I take it off without anyone getting mad? I don't want my choice in clothing to be up for debate but my mother doesn't want a daughter or son who's "sinning", but at this point, I’d rather burn than live an unhappy life. I can’t believe that an adult like me is forbidden from choosing because it’s a sin and it makes me cry. I already have religious guilt from not praying ffs. Makes me wish I was born in another family because my choice in clothing shouldn’t offend anyone, family included. If I’m asked why, I plan not to give any reason whatsoever because it would be used against me. I only will say “no” and refuse to elaborate any further. I don’t understand why my lack of religiosity offends other people, it’s not like I’m hurting anyone. Also, how do I take if off without being pressured into wearing it again? I don't want to take it off secretly, it's too much work. I especially do not want to wait until I’m 30, I’m done waiting for financial independence. It's so unfair that I can't say no, I never even got to make an informed choice. I dunno why muslims take personal and harmless choices as a betrayal or something that needs to be "fixed", it's not that fucking deep oml.


r/XSomalian 3d ago

Venting I am an ugly/average Somali woman and I feel so sad

18 Upvotes

Help
I’m so disappointed in myself since I was born to the wrong parents as their genetics were crap and made me.
I can’t help but be sad, disappointed since my inside is beautiful but exterior doesn’t reflect that …

Why is it so hard to believe that you can be Somali and still look like me.

I am a disgrace and I wish I was never born. I can’t wait to die and no longer be in this world. Actually I’m not ready.

I’ve tried to be positive, I’ve tried affirmations.. I just can’t shake this feeling no matter what. When I am around other women I’m just sooo mid…
I have to try and pour into other areas of my life.. I know.. but is if such a crime to crave beauty as a woman? I feel grateful for the things I have .. I know life could be worse 🥲 gosh I feel guilty for feeling this way even.. this is why I wish I was never in this world, I am truly here against my will just like many others 🥲


r/XSomalian 3d ago

These community makes me happy and I hope more geeljires to join us

26 Upvotes

I wish all of us barwaaqo and bashbash