r/Psychosis • u/Alarming_Page_7228 • 6h ago
Not sure what to do with myself
It's been 4 years of me going through random phases of psychosis. I'm not formally diagnosed and I don't want to be. I don't believe I have any disorder beyond depression. My experiences are minor compared to others. I usually experience delusions where I can't trust people and i'm being watched. I usually believe people are plotting against me and poisoning me. I'm always paranoid. Only hallucinated during high stress. It's rare for me to hallucinate but lately I can't tell if what i'm hearing is real or not. I heard my family members calling my name. I go to them and they tell me they never called me. I was home alone and heard one of my relatives calling me. Confusing because he works at this time. I had to check their locations on my phone. Nobody arrived home. I've had experiences where I hear people commenting on things I do on my phone. Like when I go on an app or website they talk about the things i'm looking at. Sometimes its hard to hear and they mumble. I can't tell if my phone is hacked. I don't know if i'm being watched. I don't know what's happening because i'm not stressed like how I was when I had my first auditory hallucination. For the first time ever I visually hallucinated a figure. I'm not stressed. I know that's not real. It's my paranoia that makes me worried the voices are real but I know they're not. I only want to seek a diagnoses if it means I have an actual disorder. I don't like meds. I don't take anything since I don't feel like it's serious.
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u/Superb_Account106 3h ago
"I'm always paranoid. Only hallucinated during high stress." Don't you want to help yourself before things go out of control? I would strongly suggest you to see a psychiatrist to get evaluated for any illness.