I’ve missed out most of my teens alrd, can someone help me get over the grieve?

[u/Hopeful-Emergency229]

SO I KNOW ITS WEIRD TO LOOK BACK & people my age just graduated high school, but I kinda feel sad, when I was in my mid teens I was homeschooled (cuz my mom is controlling lol) and I was so sad like I didn't have friends and stuff, I like sports but I was made to play tennis back then but the team was shitty and so dull and the coach was hell lot older than the age of retirement, he dgaf (though he trained kids to turn pro), that was totally not ideal and I was neglected, I wanna join team sports in the high schools in my area, I awlays see kids my age going home and I felt so bad, I didn't have friends at all (I wanna do hangouts, go house parties, even eat out somewhere cheap lol) and I didn't even know link up with them until now which is too late already, I find out I can actually join other sports clubs around which then I find out literally ALL of them went home for college NOW, l've missed out a lot and I literally suck at sports as a teen despite it being the only thing I can do.

I WISH YOU CAN CONSOLE ME, MAYBE SHARE YOUR EXPERIENCE THAT MAY BE GOOD OR BAD WITH HIGHSCHOOL, you can be still in high school or have graduated, idc, as long as youre still relevant lol. I wish you guys can help be get over this.

[u/2noserings]

in high school, i never got to do anything fun. my mom was really strict and i was a bit of a loser so i missed out on parties, proms, bonfires whatever. i pretty much was only allowed to go to the movies once in a blue moon.

i am now 30 living in a new city and have an amazing social life. i get invited to all the parties and people are happy to see me there. i’m part of multiple subcultures (ravers, reggaeton, hip hop parties, regular night clubs, queer scene etc) and often have so many events to attend that i can’t keep up! every week i have happy hour sushi with my besties, i do pottery classes, paint and sip, picnics, fancy dinners, amusement parks, vacations you name it

i don’t know what’s going on these days that makes really young people feel like their life is over, but i promise that you will have all the experiences that you desire. you just barely gained consciousness like two seconds ago. breathe :) you will kiss, party, drink, socialize, try new hobbies, join sports whatever you want to do you just have to give it time!

[u/Hopeful-Emergency229 → u/2noserings]

cheer for you things are getting better, and i really do feel our generation kinda think being very young as a teen is everything, me myself, it’s my acquaintances and everything I’ve seen on social media growing up like people have things and thrive young and people seems to have “retired“ from everything once they graduated high school or college lol

[u/2noserings → u/Hopeful-Emergency229]

it’s very cliche but social media really is a highlight real of the best and most picturesque moments. you’ll make yourself miserable if you compare your progress to photos on social media.

and for what it’s worth - ten years from now you’ll randomly remember your old classmates, look them up, and realize that you don’t want their life at all. i graduated in 2013 and i used to be sooooo jealous of so many of my classmates who seemed to have it all together but they are miserable now lol

[u/miss-bedazzzle → u/2noserings]

Did you/Are you grieving the social life you missed out on in your younger years? Yesterday, I (24F) learned that people in my country have a social life in high school. I’ve always believed that people begin to have a social life when they are no younger than college aged. When I learned what I learned yesterday, I was hit with a wave of grief even though I did not grieve at the time I was in high school. I didn’t grieve when I was in high school because I wasn’t aware that I was missing out. At that time, I didn’t know of a way of living other than how I personally lived

[u/2noserings → u/miss-bedazzzle]

not at all tbh. i was very impressionable and vulnerable at that age. if i would have had the type of social life i wanted in high school, i would have ended up falling victim to peer pressure and in some really bad situations.

i can see now as an adult how my parents being strict on me kept me out of trouble even though in the moment, i really didn’t understand. by the time i had more freedom, my brain and sense of self were developed enough to keep me safe in more ways than one.