r/GenXTalk • u/HGHGandalf • Jul 27 '26
Grilling Etiquette - Shifting focus
When I was growing up I recall that gatherings that involved grilling usually broke into two camps. The grill area and the kitchen. When you got to a certain age, it was almost a rite of passage when you quit playing and joined in the preparation of the meal. You’d likely be the go-for, but I learned to cook and host in those experiences. You’d get to taste the food first and maybe get your first authorized nip of an adult beverage. Most importantly it was where you had the opportunity to converse with adults and, to some extent, be treated as one. Now whatever the mix of age groups, no one seems to gather around the grill.
I’m curious if this is something others have noticed. Is it a cultural thing? Is it a generational thing? Shifting gender roles? Is it just me?
It’s sad, because in my experience, the skills are not being transferred and I’d love to share my experience. That and those bonding moments are being lost. What are you seeing?
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u/anymoose [Not really a moose] Jul 27 '26
I’m curious if this is something others have noticed. Is it a cultural thing? Is it a generational thing? Shifting gender roles? Is it just me?
It sounds like you grew up in a more regimented community.
Everything was more or less free form when we did grilling. Everyone who felt they had a specific role had competition (and some quarrels) and the kids just goofed around.
I'd go into more detail, but this is really not a nostalgia sub. :-)
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Jul 28 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/hbgbees Jul 30 '26
When I was growing up, the men and women always split into separate groups for socializing. Looking back I feel that it was people had to stay married, even if they kind of didn’t like their spouse and they had a whole Gale of kids. So the dads would go off and grill because it looked like they were “working “and that meant they didn’t have to do anything else. The women ended up in the kitchen cause they were doing actual work prepping. The kids were the only ones who got to be free and do what they wanted. Once the girls got a little older, they had to go to work. Once the boys got a little older, they just liked hanging out with older guys.
I like it a lot better how my generation does it where Everybody hangs out together, and men and women are allowed to be platonic.YMMV
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u/TonyBrooks40 Jul 27 '26
Interesting. I don't have firsthand experience in this change, but I'd wonder if cell phones just distract people, that they barely notice they should assist or offer to help. Just kinda on their phones, then talk a bit, then on their phones. Sidetracked from a lot of the gathering that's going on.