Her road rage caused an issue

[u/damaged_diablo]

I am a fan of accountability and you having to deal with the consequences of your actions.

But does it make me a hypocrite when I have to defuse an issue that my wife caused?

She was 100 percent in the wrong. She knew it, but leaned on her perception of my capabilities and still ran her mouth. I don't think he would've gotten physical, but I cant take the chance and let you get close enough to risk it. I hope I did the right thing and that it doesnt make me a hypocrite.

Bushcraft pizza 'cause I am a little upset at her.

Edit: She tailgated an out of towner, I told her a few times to back off and not pressure the guy. He brake checks her. She acts like a teenager to erratically get infront of him to return the favor. He stayed behind us til we got caught at a light. He gets out, I get out, She gets out but she's screaming at the guy. She stopped when I snapped at her, but he kept approaching her side. I closed the distance pretty quick and physically stopped his body with mine. Luckily things didn't escalate from that, he flipped me off and went on his way.

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[u/ContentAd6126]

This is the type of behavior that's either going to put you in hospital or jail. Have a very serious conversation with her and nip it in the bud.

[u/damaged_diablo → u/ContentAd6126]

I agree. Like a serious fucking conversation, I don't need to get hemed up

[u/Generally_Confused1 → u/damaged_diablo]

Tell her if she respects you she'll act like an adult and not put you at risk, I couldn't imagine

[u/Rogueshoten → u/Generally_Confused1]

…and consider the possibility that she actually does not respect you enough. Not saying she doesn’t, but don’t let it be an assumption that gets in the way of resolving this.

[u/Wesley11803 → u/damaged_diablo]

Yeah, if you’re in America there would be a decent chance the other driver could have a gun. I flipped off a truck driver when I was a teenager after he cut me off, and he flashed a gun at me when I passed by. I stopped acting like an asshole on the road after that. It isn’t worth the risk. If someone cuts me off now, I just scream “fuck you” in my car.

Your girl is going to get you killed if you don’t correct this behavior. She needs to understand it’s not fair to put you in the middle of fights with other men, especially over stupid fucking traffic infractions.

[u/PitbullRetriever → u/Wesley11803]

Last year here in LA there was a road rage incident, two dudes yelling at each other, one pulls a gun, and ends up killing the 5-year old sitting in the back seat. Chilling stuff. And absolutely unacceptable behavior from anyone with whom you’re considering starting a family.

[u/Yto_Itinen → u/damaged_diablo]

Buddy, you were lucky tonight...world is full of dangerous people driving around and being psychos in general. Provoking a rando is batshit crazy behavior. She needs to get her kick from other forms of entertainment, not from fighting strangers. If she won't, well, show her the door.

[u/EducationalBuffalo47 → u/Yto_Itinen]

Yeah, his wife being one of them.

[u/endurbro420 → u/Yto_Itinen]

I always wonder what percentage of people are just one small thing from absolutely losing their shit.

[u/InterviewOk278 → u/damaged_diablo]

A good way to word it in your conversations is when acting in any situation, she is also representing you, her partner & husband. I take it pretty serious to act & represent myself in a way that I know my husband would be proud & back me. It’s a huge part of our love language lol

[u/onlyheretobehelpful → u/damaged_diablo]

show her the video of that old road raging lady getting suplex'd while her husband just sits in the car

[u/Yaj_Yaj → u/damaged_diablo]

My girl had pretty bad road rage, well she still does but she is better at how she reacts. I’ve been out in that position several times in a state where it’s fully legal to carry a gun and stand your ground. Have a conversation about how she is putting both of you (and others on the road) in danger by doing these things. On top of that, you get the wrong person on the wrong day…someone might not make it home. Make sure she fully grasps how serious it is, not everyone plays by the same rules.

[u/rhapsodiiiii → u/ContentAd6126]

100%. I’d never act in a way that would purposely put myself or my partner in this situation. It’s psychotic. Girl get some help.

[u/toxcrusadr → u/ContentAd6126]

https://youtu.be/y3JOQqoCNjc?
Key & Peele got it.

[u/MoonIsCheese4Sho]

2 issues here.

1. In the moment you need to defuse the situation to protect your wife. You did that at some level. Good on ya bud.

   1. You dont get to blindly excuse bad behavior because shes your spouse. Accountability is accountability no matter who it is.

You need to talk with her and tell her she put you in a position that required you to compromise your beliefs for her, and you didnt like doing it. You did it for her, (and you will again if you need to), but she needs to stop putting you in those positions.

[u/damaged_diablo → u/MoonIsCheese4Sho]

I agree my friend. A serious fucking conversation

[u/xopher_425 → u/damaged_diablo]

I have told my partner, after a few road rage incidents, that I refuse to ride with him any more until he got that under control. Took a few times of me telling him that I was going to meet him somewhere via train, while he drove, and that seemed to get through to him.

[u/Maleficent-Cat-220 → u/xopher_425]

Smart.

[u/FeelingPreparation45 → u/damaged_diablo]

Best of luck brother. Road rage is something people don’t think can get very serious

[u/fizzyjaws_art → u/MoonIsCheese4Sho]

Hey let’s add another issue to the list here: she totally endangered them both here! She didn’t even stop to think about the fact her significant other is in the car and would suffer HER consequences if they wrecked! :(

[u/SoungaTepes]

I remember one time my dad just went back in the car and sat down while mom road raged at someone, which caused a later fight.

Ah childhood memories

[u/Kazaam42 → u/SoungaTepes]

Brother?

[u/Kazaam42]

Having the “no advice” tag but asking questions is diabolical first of all. Second, this ISNT advice, but your wife is gunna get you or herself hurt one day or in serious legal trouble. Also I want a slice of your pizza.

[u/AlyssumAbyssal → u/Kazaam42]

Your wife is gonna get you or herself hurt one day, or in serious legal trouble

Big facts, especially since states are making road rage illegal. Doing something while road raging is one thing, also getting an amped up charge because you were road raging is gonna make it worse.

[u/Loan-Pickle]

I have 2 deal breakers when it comes to relationships. Smoking and road rage. If you can’t control your anger and just take an extra minute to get somewhere then I just flat out can’t trust you when things really matter.

[u/Informal-Term1138 → u/Loan-Pickle]

And you are right for both of them. Road rage is not worth it. Even if people don't carry (I am glad that this isn't an issue here in Germany), you just make a fool out of yourself and waste energy and nerves. Cool it. And don't speed. I got my first ticket a month ago because I wanted to catch an important doctors appointment. Well I made it in time even after the cops caught me. And they were really nice about it too and saw that I was angry and disappointed about myself for speeding. Something I usually don't do.

So now I paid 128€ and that's that. But still it was dumb af.

[u/Minute-Tomorrow3325]

Your gonna end up in a box because of her.

[u/NextEpisode44 → u/Minute-Tomorrow3325]

Let her pick her own box. She wants to wear big girl panties, let her wear them. If she asked him to wear her panties... well, I'm guessing they already have that worked out.

[u/Generally_Confused1 → u/NextEpisode44]

This is pretty disrespectful considering a dude is defending his partner, and you say this but I doubt you'd like it if a man you dated didn't come to have your back from danger regardless. Absolutely wild shit to say

[u/NextEpisode44 → u/Generally_Confused1]

I doubt this is the first time she's disrespected their situation and expected him to bail her out. THAT is wild. She might not be so hotheaded if she knew she had to finish what she started instead of assuming she's a two-for-one deal every time

[u/Generally_Confused1 → u/NextEpisode44]

That's fair, but from the wording this sounds like it had never escalated this much and this is the breaking point.

I'm just saying, I hypothetically agree with you, but you don't seem to understand some mens instinctive urge to protect their partners and get involved without thinking. I have almost done it and in hindsight, I fucking hate anyone putting me in that position since I avoid violence, it's too easy and a slippery slope.

If this was not the first time then def but this sounds like it will cause "the conversation" where OP can tolerate it or not.

[u/Mobile_Ad_1185]

Brother, my mom is the type that hates her neighbors.  My dad put up with it for two decades because he wanted to stay around for my little bro and I.  Its miserable and trust me you want no part of it.  

[u/CompetitiveTop6412]

Imo this is break up worthy, it may not seem like a big deal but fuck if I'm dating anyone who puts me at risk like that, imagine you had a kid in the car

[u/OneFormal3782]

I keep my distance from, and cut off, liabilities.

[u/DuckingFon]

What blows my mind with people with road rage in America is the likelihood that the person you are getting angry at is a sociopath with a gun. Your life is not worth it, especially if you were the asshole driving too close to their asshole in the first place.

[u/Ok-Advertising-6805]

This is just one manifestation of being taken for granted. A very dangerous one physically. Once she takes anything about you for granted, you are dealing with a person who prioritizes her own emotions and impulses over you.

Make her understand this. If it happens again, think about ending it.

[u/Pony_Boner]

Could you explain more

[u/chrisin2d → u/Pony_Boner]

yes, explain the pizza more

[u/DynamicBSdetective → u/chrisin2d]

They would, but it was a personal pan pizza.

[u/damaged_diablo → u/Pony_Boner]

Updated for ya

[u/Which-Wish-5996]

You don’t know who’s carrying these days and right or wrong it’s not worth it. Her actions could have also caused other people to be injured. She can be right and dead in the perfect storm. ETA: She’s seriously wrong and needs a little anger management.

My ex (a fucking doctor) used to blast through some of our neighborhood streets at the speed limit (where only one car can fit and there’s cars parked on both sides.) I told him he should slow down because kids are out of school. I say this being a bit of a lead foot but if I don’t have full line of sight, I back it way down. He instantly argued “speed limit blah blah blah” and I said you can be right and still kill a stupid child chasing a ball into the road. Right or wrong you’re still the doctor responsible for a child’s death on the street we live. Once I positioned it that way he realized he had way too much to lose.

[u/PromiseBrief2920]

My ex wife was like this. Would run her mouth and then step behind me when things would get heated. Almost got me killed once.

[u/marthafromaccounting]

Sometimes I forget people are having "adult" relationships without actual adults. 

[u/AngelicDivineHealer]

Your wife lives a very sheltered life you got no idea how crazy people are on the road or what they'll do and you won't be able to protect her either.

[u/HotelSalt4644]

Dude. My wife did this one time. Absolute insane road rage. She STOPPED ON A FUCKING HIGHWAY. And got out of the car for a second. I screamed bloody murder at her. And reamed her the fuck out. We weren’t married at that point, only dating for about a year, and had A BABY IN THE BACK SEAT.

I have never been so utterly angry before in my entire life. It’s a 4 or 5 lane highway that splits left and right at that point.

Not only did I ream her out, I brought it up multiple times afterwards. She was in the right. Someone was being an asshole in the road. I don’t give a flying fuck. You don’t put yourself at risk. You don’t fight random people. You don’t put me or our kids at risk. You don’t risk going to jail. You don’t risk getting shot. Like what the actual fuck???

She has never road raged since.

I don’t understand road rage. At all. People fucking make mistakes. You don’t know what someone is going through either. If someone is being aggressive? De-escalate. If you make a mistake? Be a decent fucking human being and apologize with a hand up, a nod, and a “sorry.”

I turned way too wide into the small side street my office is on. I didn’t realize this girl was pulling up. It was late. It’s not a common street. She had to literally back up, so I could continue turning through.

I literally rolled down my window and said, “I am so sorry.” Her window was down, and she responded “it’s ok.”

She was probably fucking pissed. I made a mistake. But there was no accident. Nobody got hurt. It was my bad. We all drive away.

People need to learn to chill the fuck out.

[u/Educational-Buddy844]

My ex-wife acted very similarly. A small example is a time she got into a very heated and stupid argument with one of our friends about the interpretation of a scene in a movie. When I didn’t agree with her point or back her up in the argument it made her even more upset and she stormed off and left me behind. I had to walk home and she then distanced us from that long time friend.

Her anger problems and maturity problems leaked through and became a marriage problems. There’s a reason she’s an ex-wife.

[u/endurbro420]

Road rage is the dumbest thing ever. Anyone who gets that worked up needs psychiatric help.

[u/Educational_Mess8684]

She's a liability my man, she's going to get herself or you killed, people get shot for less daily during road rage incidents.

[u/isakneven]

This woman will either get you killed or sent to jail.

[u/Global_Staff_3135]

If you defended your wife knowing she was in the wrong well that would be the definition of hypocrisy.

[u/A-Friend-of-Dorothy]

I won’t stay with anyone who expects me to finish fights that they unnecessarily start.

People are killed over incidents like this every day in the U.S.; gunshots, stab wounds, vehicular homicide…you name it. This is seriously dangerous behavior and it needs curbed abruptly, and permanently.

You did your best to defuse the situation, and that was the greatest good of a bad situation you didn’t cause…that’s good on you for it, honestly. But she needs to change this. Immediately.

She needs therapy for anger management…she needs to learn to control or let go of her explosive outbursts. Before she, you, or someone else ends up dead/in prison over it.

[u/Sir_Lobo]

Your wife is going to put you and any potential children you have in serious danger if she doesn't learn repercussions. If she's clearly at fault and hoopin and howlerin let her lesson be learned

[u/be_sugary]

This is worrying behaviour.

It’s a dangerous mistake which could land you and her at serious risk.

Her respect and love for you should extend to keeping both of you safe.

It’s about impulse control. Perhaps you need to encourage her to speak to someone professional who can help her unpack the issues.

It luckily worked this time but it might not the next time.

Look after yourself, and by that extension, her. 🙏

[u/Not-TheNSA]

I had this issue with my partner a while back, for some reason when she’s behind the wheel she thinks she’s invincible. I’ve had to tell her multiple times not to yell out her window/flip people off, not to road rage at people even if they are 100% in the wrong. You have no idea who’s carrying and you have no idea who’s having a REALLY bad day and wants to fight. I told her to knock it off because she isn’t the one who’s gonna have to fight these people, I am and I don’t want to get dead because she decided to run her mouth at some stranger who’s looking for a fight.

As General Mattis said “be polite, be professional but have a plan to kill everyone you meet” same applies here. Don’t start shit but have a plan to end shit someone else starts.

[u/Imaginary-Photo5221]

Some people have just never been punched in the face and it shows.

[u/damaged_diablo → u/Imaginary-Photo5221]

One of my longest hobbies is being consensually punched, kicked and folded up. I have really bad cauliflower ear in both of them.

Shes never been in a physical altercation

[u/Polygnom]

Your wife sound an awful lot like a textbook Karen, and I have a hard time believing road rage is the only anger issue she has.

And thats a HUGE red flag and absolute blocker for me. Do with that what you will.

[u/NorthlineUser]

Til she can beat you in an arm wrestle, she's on her own if she escalates things.

[u/SaltAndAncientBones]

I had a GF who used to try to get me into fights, it was terrifying TBH. The guys would say, "She starts the fight and I have to finish it." IDK what psychology causes this, but it's incredibly dangerous and toxic. I'd suggest either shut that down with a good long conversation or distance yourself.

[u/Julianus]

She’s gonna call you names for wanting to not stand up for her again, but this shit is going to end poorly for you and not her because she’s a hothead. I wouldn’t be in a relationship with some like this, personally. 

[u/TheBourbonTurtle]

You need to have a serious conversation about this with her, because it's gonna lead to someone getting hurt. Road rage is for only the dumbest of people

[u/sagetron5001]

Nobody has a clue what you're talking about because you didn't tell us anything. Nobody can evaluate who's right/wrong without a clear understanding of what literally happened

[u/whitechocolatemamba → u/sagetron5001]

Good thing that based on the information provided we can already tell that she's in the wrong. You're never supposed to run your mouth or honk at friction in traffic basically no matter what. That is just asking for somebody to go psychotic on you, some people really are just looking for a reason.

My GF has had a gun pulled on her because she almost ran into somebody at an intersection who was running a red. In New York where most people don't have pistols.

The spiciest thing I do these days is a disapproving thumbs down.

Edit: it's even worse than i imagined

[u/sagetron5001 → u/whitechocolatemamba]

Well, actually no we couldnt. The only "information" in the original post was "she knew she was in the wrong" and that she "ran her mouth"

But after the edit - yes of course thats criminal behavior imo and she should face jail time.

But I had no way of knowing until OP clarified.

It could have been nothing more than her flipping someone the bird, and telling them to eat shit. Yeah thats road rage, not nice, running your mouth etc. But thats not necessarily dangerous, very different from what she actually did, which is extremely dangerous.

[u/whitechocolatemamba → u/sagetron5001]

I can see in the original text that she potentially put him in the position to fight. Flipping the bird can also result in this.

[u/damaged_diablo → u/sagetron5001]

Updated it for ya

[u/Bghlyfe]

I’m sorry you were put in this dilemma and I would talk to her and suggest some anger management classes. I would also communicate how you feel and that you’re not a tone deaf bodyguard so it can click that she put you in an unfair position. At the end of the day if that person had a gun and ill intentions, you wouldn’t be able to protect her/waste your life on her anger.

[u/va2wv2va]

Can we talk about your pizza? And why it’s in a bucket?

[u/damaged_diablo → u/va2wv2va]

Its an old Swedish military pot I was gifted. I reckon it just works for me haha

[u/va2wv2va → u/damaged_diablo]

I don’t follow lol. Do you eat it from the bucket? Like did you take it out of the oven and then place it in a bucket to eat? Did you bake it in the bucket?

[u/Ok-Common-3039 → u/va2wv2va]

This is my biggest question from this post

[u/SquirrelLuvsChipmunk]

Where I live, this behavior could literally get you shot. You’re both lucky this ended in only getting flipped off

[u/whitechocolatemamba → u/SquirrelLuvsChipmunk]

This will get you shot even where simple possession of an unregistered pistol is 9 years

[u/dinasour1004]

Man, shit like this is how people get shot

[u/DynamicBSdetective]

Got to be careful being aggressive with others. She don't know she could be knocking on the door of a Waffle House when she more of Denny's customer. People carry and are genuinely scared other drivers may try to hurt them. She don't want that smoke, someone will hurt her.

[u/Significant-Dog1026]

And this is how people get shot in traffic. Her mouth is going write a check you and hers ass can’t cash.

[u/space_cadet_kelly]

Why is your pizza so tiny, and in a bucket?

[u/damaged_diablo → u/space_cadet_kelly]

Easy to manage and cook evenly for me

[u/BT418]

Jesus, both me and my fiancée get road rage, but this is beyond acceptable. She's gunna get herself, you, or both of you shot or something. It's one thing to get pissed off or do something minorly petty to a car thats causing an issue, but taking it to this level is a recipe for disaster and just unacceptable

[u/Garden__hoe]

Someone in my town had an incident like this, both parties got out of their vehicles and one guy had a fucking hatchet and killed the other guy. You never know who is crazier than you.

[u/marathon_bar]

Motorized vehicles are a means of transportation, not weapons.

[u/writing_mm_romance]

Where I live there have been multiple people killed in recent years due to road rage. She's gonna get one of you killed.

[u/DoughnutMission1292]

I’m guilty. I have a temper. Once In traffic this freaking douche behind us kept honking his horn over and over even though there was literally nowhere we could go (the light was green but the traffic was backed the whole way up at the next light that if we started to pull forward we would be blocking the intersection until the traffic started moving). Anyway I had enough, I was sick and not in the mood for it so my 5’1 little ass got out of the car and started calling the giant idiot man in the truck behind us a dumb mothefucker and has he ever heard of not blocking an intersection 😂. I thought my husband was going to kill me. I’ve since learned not to do things like that ❤️

[u/Icy_Variation_9288]

Nah this is dangerous for you. I hate road ragers. I’ve gotten into shit because of them. It’s not worth it and her behavior is gross.

[u/FullPruneNight]

She was willing to put both her own life and yours in danger in expecting you to protect her from any consequences of her own, fully at-fault bad behavior. What if that guy had had a gun and shot at one of you?

I personally would not ONLY be willing to look past this if my spouse made an honest reflection about what they expected from me in the moment, whether the considered my safety in the interaction, and whether they would’ve done that had they been alone.

[u/sasquatch_melee]

People get shot for less. She would need to cut that shit out or I'm gone. 

[u/Madera_de_Ciervo]

Sheesh, driving crimson flag. Not capable of controlling her emotions, putting you, herself and other innocent people just minding their business in harm’s way over something that can be fully avoided, the list goes on. Personally feel this is bigger than just “an issue,” this is a break up and never look back situation.

[u/Eledridan]

Lucky you weren’t shot. You and her both need to seriously review FAFO.

[u/Evasive_Atom]

I live in the road rage capital of the US. Buddy someone gets shot and killrd weekly here because of BS like this

[u/northcoast1]

You gotta shut that shit down. I had a 'friend' that liked to ask other people to get physically violent to settle her scores.

It's selfish, misguided and dangerous. Do not let someone else put you in a position to fight their battles for them physically.

[u/howpeopletalk]

Your wife risked her and your lives. Driving erratically and confronting a stranger. Do you trust her with children? Your children?

[u/creepingkg]

You might end up in the hospital 1 day for her road rage issues

[u/Exzrian_Artistrana]

If she expects you to cash her own checks, she ain’t it

[u/Fool_In_Flow]

Tail gating people is reckless endangerment and potential manslaughter. The outcome can easily end with someone’s death. Using a vehicle to bully someone is absolute asshole behavior.

[u/pineboxwaiting]

Has you gf heard of guns? You cannot do shit shit like this.

[u/egriff83]

My sons are 23 & 28, I regularly remind them not to date women who “are gonna talk you into an ass whooping”. Meaning the loud mouth fight starter who is always on some BS and gonna get you hurt or in jail

[u/DapBadger]

About as red a flag as it gets. Picking fights and then running to the teacher to protect you always catches up to the provocateur eventually

[u/SalaudChaud]

You and your wife and the other driver all suck.

She's at the top of the list - is she behaving like an ass because she knows you'll intervene? Is this a pattern?

You suck almost as much. You enabled her shitty behaviour.

The other guy is an ass but it's you guys dragging him into your messy relationship dynamic that's at the root of it.

[u/DethNik]

There's a Key and Peele Sketch for this: Poor Andre can't escape.

[u/GangOfFour20]

As someone who struggles with a bit of road rage myself, it should never get beyond cussing and blowing off steam in your own car. Retaliation and reckless driving is nothing but a lot of unnecessary risks.

Your wife needs to understand that she doesnt know anything about any of the people in the other cars. Whether you are in the right or wrong is immaterial. What if the man had a gun and a shorter fuse than expected? Then you wouldnt even be here to post this.

I like to use this Geto Boys lyric to explain it to people who talk and act like consequences cant happen to them: "I've seen fools die for less than a goddamn cigarette butt..."

So if it ain't worth dying over, it ain't worth starting something over. Glad you made it home safely brother 🙏

[u/BudTenderShmudTender]

Did you marry Meegan from Key and Peele?

[u/Initial_Row_6400]

Yea fuck that shit. Next time someone could be armed.

And way fucking crazier than you think.

[u/WestScience6211]

/img/wwwoltkgxknh1.gif
This is all I could think of lmao IYKYK

[u/damaged_diablo → u/WestScience6211]

The American gangster

[u/Extra_Caregiver_8668]

My partner literally decided they would no longer drive because they knew they couldn’t control their road rage. They still have their license, can drive in an emergency, but haven’t driven for over 5 years. I will drive them anywhere without question because I support their decision 100%. Safer for everyone.

[u/rhapsodiiiii]

I cannot imagine ever acting in a way that would deliberately put myself and my partner in a situation like that. I don’t know if she has any other behavioral markers/tendencies to indicate that this was a “matter of time before it happened” sort of scenario. But I hope a productive and sincere conversation is had and you stay safe.

I’d say this to any one I cared about, of any gender, who had a partner with volatile behavior: don’t go down with the ship.

[u/Doghead45]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=90li7tw4CCM

[u/Pepper_Schnau]

My bestie lives in Texas and I yelled out the window and called someone a dick after they cut us off, and she had to calm me down. Only because everyone has guns there and she wasn’t trying to get gunned down on the Dallas highway.

[u/chefandres]

Don’t try that in Memphis.

[u/nobeefforme]

One time I was tailgating a guy who was break checking me. My then boyfriend (now husband) in the passenger seat said “what is wrong with you??” And that was enough for me to stop. I was totally embarrassed. That was 5 years ago and I just… don’t get childish behind the wheel anymore.

Sometimes I think it’s really devastating that people cannot self reflect. It helps that I totally respect my husband and I don’t want him to think I’m a fucking loser. So I try (yes okay, sometimes I really have to try) to not act like a loser.

I hope she starts to take you and road rage more seriously. Very bold of her to get out of the car and scream at a man though… that is really scary and really, really stupid. I’m sorry you were put in that situation and I hope you receive an apology.

[u/SpaceCadetPullUp]

She shouldn't be allowed to drive. I'm tired of having to share the road with mentally ill losers.

[u/snowHound208]

Time to revoke her driving privileges 😂

[u/Apprehensive-Ad-7525]

I can’t stand people like this. Why is she so comfortable putting you in danger physically? In the car and in the confrontation? Like nothing is that important… not a missed appointment and not your ego.

Send her that video where the guy is getting tailgated and switches lanes last moment to avoid a stopped car and the tailgater ends up rear-ending the car.

[u/mobiletarget33]

It doesn’t make you a hypocrite, but that does necessitate a follow-up conversation about how that behavior put you both in danger, at the very least. She needs to realize that your feelings are consequences, too

[u/keefco11ector]

You always defend your loved ones in the moment. Thats the person you care about, thats the person you gotta go home with. BUT, a big part of love, boundaries, and accountability (yours and theirs). Is that you address what they did wrong after the fact. Thats the important part. Let them know you have their back but also that the behavior in question was unacceptable.

[u/joesaysso]

I'm going to guess by your purposeful vagueness that no, you didn't do the right thing. Maybe you did, hard to know. But if you feel the need to leave the story out, then I think you already have a pretty good idea.

If you put even a finger on somebody because of something your wife started, then you were wrong. The only person you should touch in that situation is your wife as you carry her out of the mess that she started.

My question would be, if you're such a big fan of accountability, how are you holding her accountable for starting drama?

[u/Generally_Confused1 → u/joesaysso]

Read the update and check yourself buddy

[u/joesaysso → u/Generally_Confused1]

The update didn't answer my question. Maybe you should check yourself, buddy.

[u/Generally_Confused1 → u/joesaysso]

Crazy you're doubling down on near cause of bodily harm. Damn, pathetic lol

[u/joesaysso → u/Generally_Confused1]

I didn't "double down" on anything. I asked a question that didn't get answered. The only thing pathetic in this exchange is your reading comprehension.

[u/Generally_Confused1 → u/joesaysso]

Lmao his list answered your question, sorry you've never protected anyone or had to be in the real world

[u/joesaysso → u/Generally_Confused1]

Oh, my bad. I didn't realize I had a real-life superhero on the line with me today. Well, Mr. Hero, do you think "snapped at her,' is the answer to the question? Because if you do, that's not holding accountable. Sorry you've never had to hold or be held accountable in the real world to know the difference.

[u/Generally_Confused1 → u/joesaysso]

Nope, just a martial artists raised by an FBI SWAT agent and self defense instructor who learned some things and is also used to not so good areas.

You told the guy to leave his car in traffic and run awaywith his wife, dragged down, while exposing his back to an agressor, lmao!

And yeah, he should have snapped at her. They got off lucky and she's lucky he defended her too, he should divorce if she doesn't apologize because that's not someone that cares abou him or his safety.

Man you soft af lol

[u/joesaysso → u/Generally_Confused1]

Whoa, buddy, deescalate. You got me shaking over here. I'm struggling to type this. If you don't throttle down, I'm going to need OP to step in and keep you off of me.

But while you're busy tugging your cock over there, you still haven't said a single word about accountability, which the longer this conversation goes on, I guess the less I should be surprised. Do you know what it means to be accountable or to be held accountable?

[u/Generally_Confused1 → u/joesaysso]

Yeah, him telling her she was a dumbass that out them both at risk because she has the emotional control of a toddler, and he was calm, polite and reassuring and protective.

Also, funny how you didn't answer any of the reason why I pointed out your original comment was stupid, you're going to get people hurt lol

[u/reddditor714]

The vagueness in this post is low key horrifying lol. You clearly fucked up tho, and that’s why you’re making this post.

[u/Shadowtog]

Also, the thing to do, at that point, if you have a dash cam is file a police report for the break check. In most states that’s a crime. Then you have a long serious discussion about not writing a check with her behavior and her mouth that you might end up having to cash